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Forum -> Parenting our children -> School age children
Do your older kids wake you up?
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amother
Antiquewhite


 

Post Mon, May 29 2023, 1:29 pm
amother Honey wrote:
Right.
I thought you meant that they shouldn’t wake you till noon.

If I would have meant that, I would have said that.
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amother
Daphne


 

Post Mon, May 29 2023, 1:37 pm
amother Blonde wrote:
This is outside of my comfort zone. I’d want my baby’s diaper changed (which is full from
Overnight) before he eats and it fills up further. I only am not comfortable with my 8 year old supervising my 2 year old. I don’t feel he is her responsibility and don’t choose to parentify her by having her give breakfast to her sibling. BH I also work full time and am up at 6am every day but leaving young kids unsupervised isn’t ok with me


I nurse my baby, change diapers, and then try to sleep another hour or so. Her DH could change the diaper. And, my 8 yr old begging me to change 1yr old diaper. So gasp, I let from time to time (of course, with no poop.)
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amother
Honey


 

Post Mon, May 29 2023, 1:38 pm
amother Daphne wrote:
who said till midday? reread my post, and OP's post please.


I was responding to a different poster.
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amother
Daphne


 

Post Mon, May 29 2023, 2:11 pm
amother Honey wrote:
I was responding to a different poster.


sorry, you quoted me. but I reread the thread and saw that post you were referring to.
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amother
Diamond


 

Post Mon, May 29 2023, 2:29 pm
amother Blonde wrote:
This is outside of my comfort zone. I’d want my baby’s diaper changed (which is full from
Overnight) before he eats and it fills up further. I only am not comfortable with my 8 year old supervising my 2 year old. I don’t feel he is her responsibility and don’t choose to parentify her by having her give breakfast to her sibling. BH I also work full time and am up at 6am every day but leaving young kids unsupervised isn’t ok with me


If it's outside your comfort zone then don't do it. But you're not a better mom then me just because you run your house differently.

I don't think my kid is "parentified" because he pours milk for his younger siblings. Sheesh. Do your kids never do anything for each other? Would you allow your child to pour the milk when you are awake or is that parentifying?

And my 8.5 year old is not "supervising" or "responsible" for anyone. They play very very nicely BH. They know they can wake me for anything if they need to (which is rare). I live in an apartment so I'm sleeping about 10 feet away from them and would hear anything unusual (I'm a light sleeper)

Kids don't need to have their parents eyes trained on them 100% of the time. That is helicopter parenting.
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amother
Antiquewhite


 

Post Mon, May 29 2023, 2:36 pm
amother Honey wrote:
I was responding to a different poster.

That was me, who said we are not leaving the house until noon and apparently not leaving the house = out cold sleeping.
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amother
Honey


 

Post Mon, May 29 2023, 2:39 pm
amother Antiquewhite wrote:
That was me, who said we are not leaving the house until noon and apparently not leaving the house = out cold sleeping.


From the way you worded that post, it seemed like you were saying that kids shouldn't wake mom till noon. You clarified already, it's all good. No reason for rudeness.
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chocolate moose




 
 
    
 

Post Mon, May 29 2023, 2:41 pm
absolutely not. huge aveirah.
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amother
Cappuccino


 

Post Mon, May 29 2023, 4:09 pm
Sometimes, but I don't get out of bed and they know I won't get out of bed
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amother
Olive


 

Post Mon, May 29 2023, 4:38 pm
amother Antiquewhite wrote:
Set boundaries at night.

This is what you can take by yourself for breakfast.
These are activities you can do.

I am not taking anyone anywhere before noon/whatever designated time. If you wake me and ask to go earlier, you will not go at all. Make plans with your friends now, in advance, so plans can be made accordingly.

Please wake me if there is blood or vomit, do not wake me otherwise. If you do, I will be grumpy and the answer to everything question will be no. You want a happier, well rested Mommy. Trust me.


Finally a mother who isn't afraid to set boundaries.
This post deserves to be pinned.
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amother
Daylily


 

Post Mon, May 29 2023, 4:42 pm
Nope. My 5 and 8 year olds wake me up. My other kids want them not to disturb them and I get woken up instead.
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amother
Firethorn


 

Post Mon, May 29 2023, 6:15 pm
Nope. My kids 6-14 would never wake me intentionally. My 2 yo, on the other hand.....
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ShishKabob




 
 
    
 

Post Mon, May 29 2023, 9:00 pm
iluvy wrote:
My kids are not allowed to wake me up. This is basic kibbud eim. Even my 3yo understands this. Of course she forgets / can't resist and comes to tell me something, but then she feels guilty and says "Did I wake you up?" like she's hoping I'll say no 😂

Of course I don't get upset at a 3yo who can't resist...but I would not put up with an older child waking me and I definitely would not take them anywhere or give them any special privileges that day.

Why can't a mother sleep in if she has the chance for once? My kids are perfectly well taken care of. They are in a warm/air conditioned house full of food, drinks, toys and art supplies. Why do I have to wake up for their entertainment?

OP, just validating that your older kids should NOT be waking you up, it is perfectly reasonable for you to grab a chance to sleep in if your kids are safe, and I would think if you consistently don't answer or do the thing they're waking you up for, they'll probably stop
this
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amother
Hunter


 

Post Tue, May 30 2023, 7:09 am
amother Blonde wrote:
This is outside of my comfort zone. I’d want my baby’s diaper changed (which is full from
Overnight) before he eats and it fills up further. I only am not comfortable with my 8 year old supervising my 2 year old. I don’t feel he is her responsibility and don’t choose to parentify her by having her give breakfast to her sibling. BH I also work full time and am up at 6am every day but leaving young kids unsupervised isn’t ok with me


The OP was talking about a 10 year old. The 10 year old is not watching a 2 or 4 year old. He is taking care of himself. A 10 year old can pour cereal, milk, find a milchik spoon, take a yogurt, wash a peach. He can grab a comic book from the bookshelf. He (I hope ) can use the bathroom by himself. He can let his DM sleep a little later on Sunday.
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singsong




 
 
    
 

Post Tue, May 30 2023, 7:20 am
amother Honey wrote:
Sorry, but I don't think it's ok for mom to sleep till noon and leave the kids to fend for themselves.


I don't think that's what she meant. Say she wakes up at 9, and knows there's no rush to get out to work. Until she showers, gets dressed, eats something, drinks a coffee, maybe straightens the house a little, it's noon and she's finally ready to start thinking about getting out of the house.
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