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Forum
-> Parenting our children
-> School age children
amother
OP
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Mon, Jun 05 2023, 12:15 am
Dh wants to move. He has some valid reasons to, but I feel so guilty about changing my kids school. They are really happy where they are.
One ds will be going into 6th grade and the other into 4th.
How bad is it to switch them at this point? If you or your child changed schools at those ages, how was it?
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amother
Babyblue
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Mon, Jun 05 2023, 1:46 am
My ds switched for 5th grade. He was extremely nervous but BH adjusted very easily. He is a very social type though.
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amother
Forestgreen
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Mon, Jun 05 2023, 2:13 am
Dd switched going into 2nd. It was the best decision. She bh graduated school already and never regretted it. For reference, it was in the same town we live in.
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amother
Blue
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Mon, Jun 05 2023, 2:58 am
We made aliyah with kids around those ages. People move all the time.
Some kids - and adults - are more flexible than others. That's just human nature.
Are you worried only about your kids? Could it be that you are placing some of your anxiety on them?
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Reality
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Mon, Jun 05 2023, 3:01 am
My kids moved at that age and older and all adjusted quickly and made friends within the year.
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amother
Snapdragon
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Mon, Jun 05 2023, 4:46 am
Depends upon the reasons for switching and the child.
Barring something compelling if my kids are happy in schools that match our hashkafa then I would think long and hard before making a change.
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ChalieB
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Mon, Jun 05 2023, 7:59 am
I made aliya before 7th grade, adjusted and made friends quickly. My younger siblings also adapted nicely, most even better than me.
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amother
Lotus
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Mon, Jun 05 2023, 8:46 am
I think kids change because they are having issues at the school. Academic, social, etc. not because their dad has changed his mind about schools, though I'm sure it happens sometimes.
Did some information just come to light?
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amother
Leaf
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Mon, Jun 05 2023, 8:53 am
We moved with DDs going into 5th and 7th. I was nervous as h#ll especially since they loved their friends in the old school and the old school had a lot of positives. BH we found a new school that also has a lot of positives, albeit different ones, and both DDs made new friends quickly even though one is shy. It's not the same as having been with the same friends for years but with time I think they'll catch up on that.
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amother
Snapdragon
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Mon, Jun 05 2023, 8:59 am
Really depends upon the risk benefit calculation - no guarantees
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amother
OP
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Mon, Jun 05 2023, 9:01 am
Thanks for all the responses above. I appreciate it.
amother Lotus wrote: | I think kids change because they are having issues at the school. Academic, social, etc. not because their dad has changed his mind about schools, though I'm sure it happens sometimes.
Did some information just come to light? |
It's not the schools he changed his mind about, dh wants to move to another community for various reasons.... (Such as housing being much more affordable there, less crime, more of a community and etc....). That move would require the kids to change schools (unless they do about about an hour and 45 minutes communite which isn't realistic...)
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amother
Tan
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Mon, Jun 05 2023, 10:11 am
We moved states mid school year. My oldest was in 5th grade. He is an introvert and hates sports. He is the only kid that really struggled. When all the boys played sports he sat on the side reading a book. It took him a really long time to make friends. But I have no regrets. He did struggle, but the move was better for him and the rest of our family in the long run. He's now in beis medresh. He has his small circle of friends, but doing very well.
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Ema of 5
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Mon, Jun 05 2023, 10:13 am
amother OP wrote: | Dh wants to move. He has some valid reasons to, but I feel so guilty about changing my kids school. They are really happy where they are.
One ds will be going into 6th grade and the other into 4th.
How bad is it to switch them at this point? If you or your child changed schools at those ages, how was it? |
We changed two of our kids. One we changed to a special ed school, and one we just switched to a different school. The first one was going into 4th when switched, the second was going into 7th. BH they both transitioned VERY nicely.
The only difference is that we didn’t switch because of a move, so even though school friends changed, their neighborhood friends remained the same.
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NotInNJMommy
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Mon, Jun 05 2023, 10:16 am
I went to 5 different schools K-8 due to moving. BH I was at 1 HS.
It was always fine.
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