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Forum
-> Relationships
-> Simcha Section
e1234
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 Thu, Sep 11 2008, 1:27 am
I missed my sisters wedding. It was just too hard to make it with nowhere for the kids and all...
It's kind of hard as she has a 10th month old now and I never even met her husband or saw her married... very strange
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drumjj
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Thu, Sep 11 2008, 2:36 am
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I missed my bro in laws wedding this summer it was too far away for me to go with my kids and I wasnt feeling up to the journey. im still upset bc we as a family are very close to him. only my husband went.
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maidale
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Thu, Sep 11 2008, 3:38 am
I live far from my family, so sibs weddings are very important to me. My parents really try to schedule it so we can all attend, as they want to have all the children by the simcha. I've never missed from il's either as they tried to accomodate us as well especially this year when I was due, so they made the wedding a few weeks later. I would be very sad to miss a family wedding...
Last edited by maidale on Wed, Oct 29 2008, 5:22 am; edited 1 time in total
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Raisin
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Thu, Sep 11 2008, 6:15 am
| amother wrote: | | I have to ask this, but why would your parents make 2 weddings when they knew you couldn't come? Couldn't 1 have been a month or two earlier, & 1 could be a month or 2 later? |
lots of times chassanim and kallahs don't care, they just want to get married asap. Or it would mean waiting a few more months. or another sibling would miss the wedding if they made it later.
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mumoo
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Sun, Sep 14 2008, 4:14 am
| amother wrote: | | We weren't invited when a bil married a non-jew. So we didn't go. |
would you have gone if you were invited? 
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amother
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Tue, Sep 16 2008, 2:10 pm
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Not being at sib wedding would be really hard for me or dh. When bil was getting married out of town, they wanted it before yomim tovim but I was due. Everyone knew it was hard & it was very much appreciated that they waited 4 weeks. But my inlaws wanted all their children there. People plan weddings around all kinds of things.
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amother
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Tue, Nov 18 2008, 8:08 pm
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being the youngest stinks. you are at all their weddings and most of simchas but when its your turn you have to either schedual around all of them or miss them since its not always possible when its a big family, esp both sides
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Fabulous
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Tue, Nov 18 2008, 8:09 pm
| mumoo wrote: | | amother wrote: | | We weren't invited when a bil married a non-jew. So we didn't go. |
would you have gone if you were invited? |
My cousin married a non-jew and my father was invited. His rav told him not to go.
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BeershevaBubby
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Tue, Nov 18 2008, 11:03 pm
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I almost missed my brother's wedding. He got married in the US, 4 days after I was in a Beit Din getting my Get here in Israel.
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Mama Bear
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Tue, Nov 18 2008, 11:05 pm
my husband's sister, 2 years older than him, missed our wedding. she had a four day old baby. My IL's made a sheva brachos for us the same night as the einikel's vachnacht, so they were able to accommodate both simchos at once. My SIL was so depressed to miss her brother's wedding. We visited her 2 days later to say hi.
R' Chaim Lax a"H married off his youngest daughter this Elul. He was very weak from cancer and could not attend. The chupah was held on a rooftop patio in NY Presbyterian Hospital. A ton of doctors & nurses came to see this amazing sight, of a Chasidishe chupah held in a hospital. R' Chaim was able to be unterfierer to his daughter and dance a mitzvah tanz with her right after the chupah, before returning to his hospital room. How sad and beautiful. R' Chaim passed away 2 weeks ago.
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Rivky
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Wed, Nov 19 2008, 3:44 am
I
Last edited by Rivky on Sun, Nov 15 2009, 10:56 pm; edited 1 time in total
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shosh
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Wed, Nov 19 2008, 3:50 am
| Mama Bear wrote: | | R' Chaim Lax a"H married off his youngest daughter this Elul. He was very weak from cancer and could not attend. The chupah was held on a rooftop patio in NY Presbyterian Hospital. A ton of doctors & nurses came to see this amazing sight, of a Chasidishe chupah held in a hospital. R' Chaim was able to be unterfierer to his daughter and dance a mitzvah tanz with her right after the chupah, before returning to his hospital room. How sad and beautiful. R' Chaim passed away 2 weeks ago. |
What a beautiful story! That brought a tear to my eye ...
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chanchy123
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Wed, Nov 19 2008, 3:54 am
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My SIL (DH's brother's wife) missed our wedding. She was on pregnant and on bed rest and couldn't come. Unfortunetly, a few weeks later she lost the baby.
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drumjj
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Wed, Nov 19 2008, 3:59 am
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I missed my bro in laws wedding in australia this summer I was so upset but I was early pregnant and so sick there was no way I was travelling that far.
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amother
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Wed, Nov 19 2008, 7:02 am
(anon b/c I know one of my SILs has an imamother account)
Missed my SIL's wedding because I was 39 weeksd pregnant. I ended up having my baby the very next day. (we were living too far away for me to travel) Was extremely upset about the situation, because they easily could have made the wedding a week or 2 later and we couldve come, it wasnt made when it was made to accomidate my SIL who was getting married, but rather another sibling, for extremely selfish reasons. I honestly didnt care all that much, its not MY family, not MY sister, and I saved a thousand bucks on a custom made maternity dress that had to be the same color and same style as all my SILs , but my DH was not so happy about missing his sisters wedding. I went into labor the next morning...
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drumjj
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Wed, Nov 19 2008, 7:04 am
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amother who just posted those situations are really hard. my bro in law is getting married in a few weeks in new york and he purposefully made the wedding a few weeks early than he would have bc he knows I really would like to be there and he would like me to be there too.
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Ruchel
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Wed, Nov 19 2008, 9:24 am
We're two onlies, but I know people who missed siblings/sib ils weddings. On purpose or not.
My cousin refused to go to his sis wedding because it was on his bday and he felt she was wanting to get attention. Sad.
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yo'ma
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Wed, Nov 19 2008, 9:49 am
| Ruchel wrote: | | My cousin refused to go to his sis wedding because it was on his bday and he felt she was wanting to get attention. Sad. |
That is very sad. My brother got married the same day as another brothers birthday. My sister got married on my mothers birthday and now also my ds birthday  . I got married the day before my sisters birthday. What's the big deal? The singer wished the birthday boy/girl a special happy birthday.
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Ruchel
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Wed, Nov 19 2008, 9:52 am
| yo'ma wrote: | | Ruchel wrote: | | My cousin refused to go to his sis wedding because it was on his bday and he felt she was wanting to get attention. Sad. |
That is very sad. My brother got married the same day as another brothers birthday. My sister got married on my mothers birthday and now also my ds birthday . I got married the day before my sisters birthday. What's the big deal? The singer wished the birthday boy/girl a special happy birthday. |
they've always been in competition for attention, because the son is sick and the girl (younger) was jealous of the attention he got... and it never ended...
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amother
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Wed, Nov 19 2008, 11:45 am
| drumjj wrote: | | amother who just posted those situations are really hard. my bro in law is getting married in a few weeks in new york and he purposefully made the wedding a few weeks early than he would have bc he knows I really would like to be there and he would like me to be there too. |
oh trust me it was really hard! and my FIL was disgusting about it. he kept yelling at DH and was like "why cant she just have the baby here, why does she have to be so particular about where she has it," (uh, cuz I want MY doctor to deliver the baby? not someone who met me a week before? and because I was in school and couldnt just leave 3 weeks before to go live with my in laws so I would be able to safely be there before the wedding?) and that Im selfish because I dont care about shalom bayis and I think school is more important than family (?!?)
The wedding was made 4 weeks later than the original date my SIL and her Chosson proposed, because one of my husbands other sisters was due a few weeks before that original date, and she cried to her mother about not wanting to look fat at the wedding!! those two sisters are extremely close, so she changed the date for her!! Thats wonderful and all, and Im glad her sister the kallah was so selfless and spent one more month being engaged so her sister could fit into a size 2 rather than 4 gown, but then to yell at me about being "selfish?" for not wanting to move in with my in laws for 3 weeks/not wanting to endanger my life/not wanting to change doctors?? and in the end I gave birth the next day, so I wasnt worrying for nothing. Im glad I made that choice, and once we had the baby the next day, so was my DH. I was SOO happy(I know this is mean), that my FIL wasnt at the hospital when I had the baby, I dont think he deserved to be there.
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