Home
Log in / Sign Up
    Private Messages   Advanced Search   Rules   New User Guide   FAQ   Advertise   Contact Us  
Forum -> Parenting our children
Sacrificing staying @home?



Post new topic   Reply to topic View latest: 24h 48h 72h

amother


 

Post Thu, Dec 29 2005, 12:08 pm
If u had 2 or 3 kinderlach and rented an apartment for years that was expensive but u had a chance to purchase a home but u would have to work probably for years 2 afford the morgage, would u? Would u tie urself down to working and not being home, but at least know u would have enuf space 4 ur family and a place u could call urr own??
Back to top

Motek




 
 
    
 

Post Thu, Dec 29 2005, 9:53 pm
how old are the children?

would they prefer more space or you?

who would care for them if not you?
Back to top

Rivka




 
 
    
 

Post Sun, Jan 01 2006, 8:21 am
Wow if you could afford to buy a home just by working for two years I would do it. I work now and I couldn't afford more than what I rent.
Also I would take it that if you had 3 kids at home at least one or two would be able to go to school already.
Truth is would it be worth it, paying for someone to care for your children and working, would you still be able to afford a morgage after just two years of working??
I would say go for it. If you find it's too hard to work when you have two or three kids then you can quit.
Back to top

happyone




 
 
    
 

Post Sun, Jan 01 2006, 8:38 am
I would go for it if it meant just two years. It's not the quantity time your spend with your kids but the quality. Owning a home, the way I look at it, is a future for your children. It's an asset you could leave behind for them after 120. You're offering them more space, etc.. If it meant being tied down, and responsible for the mortgage indefinatly, is a different story and needs more thinking about on your part - if you're up to having the financial pressure on your head.
good luck
Back to top

happymom




 
 
    
 

Post Sun, Jan 01 2006, 9:12 am
Quote:
I would go for it if it meant just two years. It's not the quantity time your spend with your kids but the quality


so if a mother only spends twenty minutes or so a day that wouldn't matter, as long as it was quality time? I disagree. I believe quantity makes a BIG difference.
Back to top

Rochel Leah




 
 
    
 

Post Sun, Jan 01 2006, 9:59 am
For some people less space is more condusive to a tense environement. In the long run having more space will enable a family to be more calm as there is place for everyone.
Back to top

TzenaRena




 
 
    
 

Post Sun, Jan 01 2006, 12:00 pm
How about doing something at home to bring in the money? That worked for me for a while, and many choose this route. It could be the best of both worlds. There is a thread on it in the working mothers section, I think.
Back to top

Motek




 
 
    
 

Post Sun, Jan 01 2006, 9:43 pm
Quote:
u would have to work probably for years 2 afford the morgage


I will translate this part of amother's post and then look back at what you wrote:

"You would have to work probably for years to afford the mortgage"
Back to top

BrachaVHatzlocha




 
 
    
 

Post Mon, Jan 02 2006, 9:54 am
I work out of the home and am not even dreaming of purchasing a home. I guess you don't live in NY.... LOL.
good luck with your decison. It's something you need to discuss with your husband. Keep in mind that owning a home isn't everything, though it's nice.
Back to top

happy




 
 
    
 

Post Mon, Jan 02 2006, 8:59 pm
I rent and it has been and still is a horrible experience for me. I've moved 4 times already! the first was tiny , my next was nice until I was forced to move out because the house was sold, third was nice until I was forced to move out because the house was sold and the new owner wanted a 300 $ per month increase. Now where I'm living the neighbors complain that my kids run. Did you ever meet kids that don't??
Consider the situation you are living with now, Are you comfortable and do you feel relativly secure that the house is not about to switch hands rapidly?

My personal opinion would be GO FOR IT! You can always sell (hopefully at a profit!!!).
Back to top

Rivka




 
 
    
 

Post Wed, Jan 04 2006, 7:18 pm
Yes quality time is better than quantitiy time you spend with your kids.
Imagine, 20 minutes every day spent with your children where you give them all your energy and complete attention, playing and reading to them, hearing what they have to say and getting cuddles.
Now look at the other scenario, mother at home all day with kid, kid runs around, mother fed up, spends most time yelling at child, feeling exasperated and run down. Constantly tired.
That is 12 hours spent with child, they might get a bed time book if they are lucky. Which child is happier????

Anyway, amother seriously do what you feel you want to do. I would go for it, if you don't you will always be wondering "what if?"
Back to top

Motek




 
 
    
 

Post Thu, Jan 05 2006, 2:22 pm
Rivka wrote:
Yes quality time is better than quantitiy time you spend with your kids.


don't tell me you believe that!?

Quote:
Anyway, amother seriously do what you feel you want to do.


no matter what the consequences? feelings are where it's at?

Quote:
I would go for it, if you don't you will always be wondering "what if?"


that works both ways you know ... she won't know what would have been if she had stayed home ...
Back to top

DefyGravity




 
 
    
 

Post Thu, Jan 05 2006, 2:39 pm
It's very very smart to be a homeowner, and it's also practical for any family to have dual income. And you might want to buy asap, b/c real estate is only going up. We bought our house a year ago, and it's already nearly doubled in price.

Your kids aren't going to suffer if you work. Me and most of the people I know were raised by two working parents and all of us turned out great. (I only know one person that had a stay at home mom, and I don't think she turned out better for it). My mother was there when I needed her. I went to pre-school during the day, had fun w/ other kids my age, went to a friend's house after school, and then my mother picked me up a few hours later.

If mothers can afford to stay home fine, but don't lose out on things that could be beneficial for you if you would go out and work. Remember, there are professions where you can make a great salary and work part time. Nurses can work 3 twelve hour shifts which is full-time salary.

There ARE professions that are available for women that want to put in part-time hours and make decent salaries, unfortunately, too many women choose to get married young rather than wait a few years and get a degree that could enable them to earn decent $$$.

Furthermore, many mothers NEED to work for their sanity. Not everyone can stay home with kids all day without some type of outlet.


Last edited by DefyGravity on Thu, Jan 05 2006, 3:32 pm; edited 1 time in total
Back to top

Motek




 
 
    
 

Post Thu, Jan 05 2006, 3:00 pm
repeat post:

Motek wrote:
Quote:
u would have to work probably for years 2 afford the morgage


I will translate this part of amother's post and then look back at what you wrote:

"You would have to work probably for years to afford the mortgage"


NOT 2 YEARS, BUT YEARS!
Back to top

DefyGravity




 
 
    
 

Post Thu, Jan 05 2006, 3:16 pm
Amother probably means that she would have to work for two years so they could have the necessary money to put down on the house. Maybe once they put the down payment on the house, her husband can afford $1200 (or so) to make the monthly payments on the mortgage.
Back to top

Motek




 
 
    
 

Post Thu, Jan 05 2006, 3:21 pm
DefyGravity wrote:
Amother probably means that she would have to work for two years


that's not what she wrote!

try reading it out loud and you'll see your mistake
Back to top

DefyGravity




 
 
    
 

Post Thu, Jan 05 2006, 3:31 pm
I see my mistake, but my initial sentiment still stands.
Back to top
Page 1 of 1 Recent Topics




Post new topic   Reply to topic    Forum -> Parenting our children

Related Topics Replies Last Post
How to make Purim fun when staying home
by amother
6 Wed, Mar 06 2024, 4:10 pm View last post
Staying in Louisiana where can I stay walking distance to ch
by amother
3 Mon, Feb 19 2024, 7:15 am View last post
Winter vacation- staying home
by amother
45 Fri, Jan 19 2024, 8:22 am View last post
by DVOM
Staying in bed
by amother
5 Sun, Jan 07 2024, 4:22 pm View last post
Staying in a hotel over shabbos, what to do?
by amother
13 Thu, Dec 28 2023, 10:37 am View last post