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Forum -> Relationships -> Manners & Etiquette
How to turn someone down



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Falafel




 
 
    
 

Post Mon, Jan 05 2009, 6:11 pm
DHs friend asked us for help to find a wife.
I gave a suggestion, he was excited - they went out a few years ago but it never went anywhere and he really wanted a second chance. He even said he was going to halt whatever shidduch was about to happen until he had an answer.
I called her up today, and well, she isn't interested to go out again. I asked her if she wants to share her reasons? She said no!
Now what do I tell him?
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chocolate moose




 
 
    
 

Post Mon, Jan 05 2009, 6:29 pm
Just that. And move on.
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greenfire




 
 
    
 

Post Mon, Jan 05 2009, 7:43 pm
I guess it's hard to be a middleman - but you have to be upfront and tell him that it didn't work out and he should pursue the other shidduch ... what else can you do ... maybe it was just a chemistry thing ...
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queen




 
 
    
 

Post Mon, Jan 05 2009, 9:38 pm
"She thought you were a lovely person but not what she was looking for in a husband"
(add a nice comment to soften the blow)
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mama-star




 
 
    
 

Post Tue, Jan 06 2009, 5:13 am
I agree with what choc moose said. I think to say "you're not what she's looking for in a husband" is self-evident (and potentially hurtful).
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