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How am I gonna manage Vent



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amother


 

Post Wed, Mar 11 2009, 3:44 pm
I am a pregnant mother of 2 (ages 2.9 and 1.4) and currently have a cousin's child by my house (age 4.5) because she had a baby. I was barely managing with the 3 of them as is, and my husband just broke his hand yesterday...meaning no help from him, and he obviously needs my help to do the basics.
I don't know how I am gonna manage...especially with Pesach coming along!
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Raisin




 
 
    
 

Post Wed, Mar 11 2009, 3:55 pm
amother wrote:
I am a pregnant mother of 2 (ages 2.9 and 1.4) and currently have a cousin's child by my house (age 4.5) because she had a baby. I was barely managing with the 3 of them as is, and my husband just broke his hand yesterday...meaning no help from him, and he obviously needs my help to do the basics.
I don't know how I am gonna manage...especially with Pesach coming along!


will it make you feel better to know that people manage with far more on their plate? how long is this child staying?
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amother


 

Post Wed, Mar 11 2009, 3:59 pm
I am trying to calm myself by thinking of others, and it helps but....btw he is staying for 2 weeks
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amother


 

Post Wed, Mar 11 2009, 4:01 pm
You're already off to a good start cuz you're doing better than me (is that really any consolation? Confused )
I have 2 young kids at home and my husband helps out (with B"H both working hands) as much as your husband could now. I was going to offer to watch a friends kid while she's going through some tough times right now but I'm not sure if I could handle even that.

Pesach cleaning? ha! I'm not sure how that'll happen. But try starting now - baby steps. Do a drawer for 10-20 minutes, Make some plans on paper - menus, things to do, shop for, etc...

Good luck!
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challi




 
 
    
 

Post Wed, Mar 11 2009, 4:08 pm
amother don't think about what will be just think about what you have at hand (sorry about your dh's btw) right now.

Write a list of everything that needs to be done in the next month with a do by date next to it. Then take that list and make daily goals (start now) but make them small and put it on a calendar ( I make my own so I have it just how I want) At the end of the week or day give yourself a reward, you deserve it ( write that down too.)

It'll be ok. It all has to happen and it will. It all seems so overwhelming sometimes, but when we get to look back we are all amazed at what we have actually accomplished. Just keep reminding yourself.
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chocolate moose




 
 
    
 

Post Wed, Mar 11 2009, 4:13 pm
How long is that child staying, and are your kids going there when you give birth ?
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flowerpower




 
 
    
 

Post Wed, Mar 11 2009, 4:14 pm
Try to do the least you need to and if you can get a cleaning lady to help with pesach. Hang in there!
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Raisin




 
 
    
 

Post Wed, Mar 11 2009, 4:52 pm
do easy suppers - even if you have the same thing twice or more a week - so you can concentrate on pesach cleaning.

find out the halachos of what really needs to be cleaned for pesach.
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amother


 

Post Wed, Mar 11 2009, 5:47 pm
chocolate moose wrote:
How long is that child staying, and are your kids going there when you give birth ?


As mentioned he is staying for 2 weeks, and my kids will probably not go to her when I give birth, but I know that I can rely on her when I do need babysitting at any other time.

Anyway, I wrote the first post right after coming from the doc with my hubby, and now that some time passed, (and with all your advice) I am convincing myself that somehow we all get there....
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pacifier




 
 
    
 

Post Wed, Mar 11 2009, 7:47 pm
take it one day at a time. if it gets too hard just send him back to his mother.
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Stayci




 
 
    
 

Post Wed, Mar 11 2009, 7:51 pm
The fact that you're pregnant is a real advantage to both you and your husband. He knew to break his hand when you'll be able to help him.
My tip: push off your spring cleaning and do the basic Pesach Preparations.
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imasinger




 
 
    
 

Post Wed, Mar 11 2009, 8:20 pm
Stayci wrote:
The fact that you're pregnant is a real advantage to both you and your husband. He knew to break his hand when you'll be able to help him.
My tip: push off your spring cleaning and do the basic Pesach Preparations.


Wise advice. And if you know any middle sized kids who could come and be a mother's helper in your house, and entertain the kids while you clean, that might work.
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raizy




 
 
    
 

Post Sun, Mar 15 2009, 12:31 am
use your dh for a mother or father helper and u clean he should watch the kids or take them out for a walk so u can clean in peace.

and I feel for u its like having 4 kids to watch when the dh is out of commission.
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ValleyMom




 
 
    
 

Post Sun, Mar 15 2009, 12:35 am
Just focus on what's in front of you and try not to worry about tomorrow or next week or pesach.
You may not have your home as cleaned for Pesach as you normally do--just remember you really need to do the kitchen. I used to make myself crazy and my entire home insane for pesach. Then I focused strictly on the kitchen. The rest of the house gets Pesach cleaning in July and August when I have time off. I know Hashem completely understands and is happy that my family is relearning to enjoy and appreciate the beauty of Pesach without a mother who is raging out of control.
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greenfire




 
 
    
 

Post Sun, Mar 15 2009, 12:48 am
I hardly think you can clean any more or less while watching 2, 3 or even 4 kids ... so I wouldn't make that the worry ... they all can eat at the same time ... bath at the same time ... sleep at the same time ...

also I would presume the dh still has another hand with which he can do his share with ...

people go overboard with pesach ... you need to eat it - lock it up - sell it ... have a clean kitchen and dining room since that is where you eat ...
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goodheart




 
 
    
 

Post Sun, Mar 15 2009, 1:04 am
ValleyMom wrote:
Just focus on what's in front of you and try not to worry about tomorrow or next week or pesach.
You may not have your home as cleaned for Pesach as you normally do--just remember you really need to do the kitchen. I used to make myself crazy and my entire home insane for pesach. Then I focused strictly on the kitchen. The rest of the house gets Pesach cleaning in July and August when I have time off. I know Hashem completely understands and is happy that my family is relearning to enjoy and appreciate the beauty of Pesach without a mother who is raging out of control.

I agree Thumbs Up
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