Upsetting sight! kid sleeping in parked van

613

Thu, Feb 03 2005, 4:51 pm

I didn't know exactly where to post this, but I think it can fit into children's health.
I was at our local kosher grocery store yesterday. As I was getting into my car to leave, I saw into the van that was parked facing me. And inside was a kid in a carseat fast asleep.

I couldn't believe it! Do you find this as terrible as I do? Now, there was a car next to that one with a man sitting inside, so I could be Dan Lkaf Zechus and say that the mother (or father, or babysitter?) of the sleeping kid asked this man to sit there till (s)he came out (maybe she knows the man well, or is related). I was sort of upset at myself as I was driving away- maybe I should have stayed, or at least investigated a little more.

Tefila

Thu, Feb 03 2005, 5:07 pm

Also was the car on? You see if the kid is older then going in to get some quick fruit and car is parked right in front so is visible to the inside and the car is locked but NOT on. Then it's not a major deal maybe not recommended but not worst case.
I think it all depends. You see we've done that with a bank machine, and with my then one yr old, who was sleeping!

613

Thu, Feb 03 2005, 5:16 pm

Couldn't tell how old the kid was- maybe 2 - still in a carseat. It's a big store (with a pretty big parking lot) and it was park in a regular spot (not the first one- at least the third or fourth in on the row). I was already inside my car, so I couldn't hear if the car was on or not. but, I heard it's dangerous to stay in a car that's on if it's not moving. my husband was once driving from another state and got tired. he pulled over at one of these scenic overlooks, left the car on, and closed his eyes for a few minutes. well, all of the sudden, there was a knock on his window. it was a cop telling him to either turn off the engine, or open a window, cuz if the car is on and not moving then you can start breathing in the fumes (or something like that).

Pearl

Tue, Feb 08 2005, 4:40 am

Shocking!

Never leave a (young) child alone in the car! Horrible tragedies happen like that....plenty of stories proving that in Israel that I know off....

But thank you for posting it, as it also addresses a different point - What can you say, how can you interfer (if at all!!) when you see somebody doing wrong by a/their child?
I was in the supermarket last week, and a mother before me in line, looking totally neglecting herself, was very nasty to her +/- 7 yr old boy, who was very pale, and talked very quiet, and did absolutely nothing wrong. There was also a little girl, probably 18 months. Both children looked absolutely patrified of their mom....Everyone standing there felt very uncomfortable, but nobody said anything....Well, CAN one say something? I had tears in my eyes leaving the super, I mean, I wish I could have given that boy a feeling that somebody cares.......

zuncompany

Tue, Feb 08 2005, 9:08 am

just an fyi- you just need to crack the windows to deal with the fume issue.

I don't agree with leaving my kids in the car, but the truth is we can not judge these people cause we don't know the situation at all.

sara

Rivka

Tue, Feb 08 2005, 11:22 am

It is dangerous leaving a child in a car alone. I think it even is a criminal offense and you could get taken to jail for it. Too many cases of kids left in cars that actually wern't on and died.

shayna

Wed, Feb 09 2005, 12:17 am

In my opinion it is never ok to leave a child in a car by themselves for whatever the reason. What if someone decided to steal the car not knowing there was a kid in it, or the child waking up to find out he or she is alone. It is not about judging its plain and simple WRONG to leave a child in a car alone.

gryp

Wed, Feb 09 2005, 9:25 am

I agree shayna. and if you open the windows for air how much easier is it to steal the car? Confused

I have heard and seen too many tragedies r"l or almost-tragedies ch"v that it is obvious that it is plain wrong and nothing to do with judging.

I dont know how many heard about this past summer a 9 month old of a frum family was left in the car and suffocated. the father was just running an errand. that morning it was on the news here and the talk show hosts decided he did it on purpose because he didnt want his baby anymore! one of the fathers friends called up and screamed at them, how dare you say that? dont you think he is suffering enough? they answered him, then why did he do something like this, obviously he didnt want the baby. since then I stopped listening to those talk show hosts, who kows what other meshugasim they come up with...

Yael

Thu, Feb 10 2005, 9:47 pm

so what would you do in this situation?
you have 2 babies in carseats. its snowing like crazy and freezing and icy. every time you open or close the carseats straps your fingers hurt from cold. and you just need to drop something off by the dry cleaners. just go in, put it on the table, get a receipt and walk out. takes less than 90 seconds. theres noone else in the store so you dont have to wait in line. would you spend 10 min getting the kids out and into a stroller, which you have to take out from the trunk and set up. and then another 10 getting them back in? or just run in, looking over your shoulder at the car where you can see your kids?

Pearl

Fri, Feb 11 2005, 6:28 am

I would run in, do what I have to do and run out, but I'd have to be absolutely sure I could do in 90 seconds! I think we have all done that once or twice.....
but caution, caution, triple caution! also in israel I have heard some AWFUL stories......

ForeverYoung
Guest

Fri, Feb 11 2005, 10:16 am

even in warm weather cars heat up to dangeous (especially for babies & children) temeratures VRY quickly, so we have to be VERY careful, even id it's for 30 sec

Once my hubby needed to get me rom a store. it was cold, so he left the car runnung, our son was buckled & couldn't umbuckle. My husband, assuming I had keys, locked the car & ran to call me (hr parked in front of the store.

Well, my purse, with the keys, was in the car too.
B'H, locksmith came really fast & opened thge car Smile

BasHashem

Sun, Feb 13 2005, 12:21 am

613, as a descent human being you should have done something about it, either call the cops, or wait there till the parents got back. You said you didnt know if the guy in the next car was watching, but didnt you feel an obligation as a person to see that the child was ok.

It could have been that the parent did even remember that the childe was there.

Once many years ago, I went shopping with my girl freind, she picked me up and it was very dark out, The drive was over 1/2 hour away, and we shmoozed. while walking up and down the aisle she gave a gasp and starting screaming, that she left the baby in the car. When she got back, I told her I didnt even know the baby was with us, she said the baby fell asleep right when the drove off, so we didn't hear her at all, and she forgot.

She is a good person who simply forgot.

Bashashem

ForeverYoung
Guest

Sun, Feb 13 2005, 12:35 am

calling cops could get the mother into a big trouble.

If it was obvious where the parents are, one can ask mamnagement to page lis # & ask owner to come up to the front or something

Confused

amother

Sun, Feb 13 2005, 12:58 am

when I was going through ppd I forgot my baby in the car.
It was only for a few minutes but someone asked me where she was and I panicked and raced back to the car. She was fine, wasn't crying and it was only a few minutes but I was almost in pieces. I was amongst people so I had to fight really hard not to burst into tears.

BasHashem

Sun, Feb 13 2005, 1:18 am

Fy, some mothers dessrve to get into big trouble, and if the mom made a human error and forgot, and the cops will see there are no other complaints on this family, then she will not get in trouble. BUT if she simply didnt want to wake the baby up, and ran to get milk, or what ever it may be, she deserve a consequense, and a new additude.

and you are right there are other ways to deal with this situation, but If 613, or anyother person who saw this, did nothing then that's bad! Sad

BaHashem

shayna

Sun, Feb 13 2005, 1:32 am

Yael wrote:

I think your wrong, if you can't do it with out leaving the kids in the car then have you or your husband watch the kids or a friend and bring it in another time. I have 7 kids and I find ways to do my shopping and dry cleaning...now adays they have heimeshe dry cleaners who will pick up the stuff. There is never a reason my first 3 children are 11 mos apart that was 3 kids under the age of 2 I never left them in a car. There is no rationalizing when it comes to the saftey of a child.

ForeverYoung
Guest

Sun, Feb 13 2005, 1:03 pm

Quote:

if the mom made a human error and forgot, and the cops will see

not where I live.

Here, there is such greate persentage of accidents in other families, that when something happends in a frum family, they're out to get you, at least to even out the statistics.

When my son needed stitches, I was told to go to a privite doc if I can find one that is still opened (after 6 pm), as apposed to an emergency room!!!
B'H, we were able to find one.