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In this week's Jewish Press...what do you think?

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Forum -> Parenting our children

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Estee2

Fri, Jun 30 2006, 7:20 pm

Yes, I do teach Part -Time (and, B"H, I have been able to have a
schedule that works around my children and husband's hours)

I twice had students pick flowers from the schoolyard and
say, "Here, I picked two baches of flowers, one batch is for you and the
other one for my babysitter !" shock

shock

shock

Yes, they are truly cared for, (Their mothers are FT workers),
by me, their teacher, and their babysitter. That's great !!
BUT, how about their MOTHER !!??!!

amother

Fri, Jun 30 2006, 7:23 pm

Crayon210 wrote:

I can't imagine that the women on this site don't check out the baby-sitters and make sure everything is okay. I think people are more responsible than you're giving them credit for. I also think you're needlessly scaring a lot of women and making them feel bad.

I think you should stop picking on happymom. do you have some personal issue going on here???
she brought up very valid points. and if you think that the woman on this site are so fragile that what she says can so damage them, than they should step out of the kitchen.
getting too hot for you here?
crayon, did you stay home with your kids?

amother

Fri, Jun 30 2006, 7:25 pm

Mindy wrote:

well.... I just came from the park... a black nanny showed up with a little boy and a little girl in a stroller. Mother at work? mother at the gym? Nope... this mother has 2 year old triplets and an 8 month old baby as well, and she is home with them, but need help to survive! You all wouldve judged her without knowing the facts!

we are clearly not talking about those situations here...

amother

Fri, Jun 30 2006, 7:26 pm

[quote="Crayon210"]

Quote:

This rant is appalling for many reasons:

4. JUDGE? We don't judge people, not in my religion.

shock

come again?????
and what religion would that be???????????

amother

Fri, Jun 30 2006, 7:29 pm

[quote="Mindy"]

Quote:

she is coming off way too strong. THe majority of working mothers are home by 3 p.m. or 5 p.m.

are these mothers of babies your talking about here? or school age children? big difference.

amother

Fri, Jun 30 2006, 7:30 pm

baby's mom wrote:

I completely agree with the letter!
Today in most societies, we are not taught to appreciate the fact that we will be mothers, how to cope with children...We are not encouraged to stay home with our little ones..the value system is changing and mother's are willing to leave their children for long hours...

you are ABSOLUTELY right. could not have said it better.

amother

Fri, Jun 30 2006, 7:36 pm

Crayon210 wrote:

momof3 wrote:

I think she's right about non-Jewish babysitters taking care of kids. I hate seeing these ladies at the park, or shopping, or taking them to & from school or even for pizza. I don't even believe that all these women work. (I know of 1 specifically who doesn't). But if they have to work, there are plenty of competent Jewish women in our neighborhood who babysit in their home.

I don't understand why the community gets to have an opinion about who takes care of other people's children.

kol yisroel araivim zelaze. we are responsible and should have an opinion when we see something that may not coincide with jewish values. who takes care of jewish children is of utmost importance and should be taken very seriously. none of us wants to think that maybe we just carried the baby for 9 months and thats all. we all want to feel, (those of us that care), that we have an everlasting influence on our child and what direction he/she chooses to take in life. if they got the majority of their love and security from a babysitter, than you have lost that power. plain and simple.
Lets call a spade a spade.

amother

Fri, Jun 30 2006, 7:49 pm

I actually lived next to the 18th avenue park in BP. I am of the party that would do everything so that I can stay home and RAISE and BE MECHANECH my kids. I used to leave the park depressed/bewildered as to what I saw there. Im not here to stereotype but there were non-frum/non j babysitters there yakking away while the kids ran around alone and they used to curse in Russian if the kids didnt want to eat or drink what they were offering. Of course there are exceptions to the rule but I saw this happening way too much. Little babies with their heads hanging down, sleeping and the nanny is busy in her own little world while the kid is there . I actually saw one nanny slap a approx. 2 yr old for not being calm enough. This is justifiable? no it is not no matter which way you color it! These kids had the most expensive designer clothing and most up to date carriages! Had I called one mother I wouldve gotten the response that Oh! thanks for calling but I have her working for me for 3 yrs. shes VERY trustworthy! ( of course shes on her best behavior around you). I actually have a family member with a CAREER. Her oldest children are very emotionally stable and I attribute it to the fact that she did not work while they were growing up. Her youngest is a nervous hyperactive sometimes violent 6 yr old. He had no mother there for him although she would claim "I sit on the floor and play legos with him" . I heard that line so many times its worthless. When she comes home she has no patience for him or her other kids. After all , she must wind down from her day! When he wants some time, she is frustrated. Im talking about a woman that has a million dollar home and has several mortgages. Im NOT judging pple that are supporting kollel (or sit-arounds) yingerman ...thats a story in itself . MY point is that even if a mother has a bad day, htere is nothing comparable to having a mom greet you when you come home and nothing compares to having a child smile to you as he comes home from cheder/school. Mishpacha mag had some articles abt this. It pissed me off to see that they were consoling me and telling me to look at the bright side of staying home with my kids . HUH? IN my opinion , OUR world has gone crazy!

amother

Fri, Jun 30 2006, 7:53 pm

amother above, you said it best.
Yasher koach!

amother

Fri, Jun 30 2006, 7:57 pm

thanks above mother but I truly am very passionate abt this subject as I see the consequences black on white . a gut shabbos!

amother

Fri, Jun 30 2006, 8:06 pm

yup, if mother's don't have time or money to raise children then maybe they should think twice, or three times before have anymore.

happymom

Fri, Jun 30 2006, 8:10 pm

Quote:

I think you should stop picking on happymom. do you have some personal issue going on here???

thank u! thats what I was wondering.

amother

Fri, Jun 30 2006, 8:18 pm

happymom wrote:

Quote:

I think you should stop picking on happymom. do you have some personal issue going on here???

thank u! thats what I was wondering.

probably feeling guilty...happymom your posts are right on target!

mali

Sat, Jul 01 2006, 3:57 pm

I think the bottom line is, that every mother has to think what will make HER a better mother, and stop looking at what everyone else is doing.

shalhevet

Sat, Jul 01 2006, 6:22 pm

I'm amazed at this thread, because in EY, a frum woman would never dream of leaving her child with a non-Jewish or non-frum babysitter.

Ruchel

Sat, Jul 01 2006, 8:00 pm

mummyof6 wrote:

I'm amazed at this thread, because in EY, a frum woman would never dream of leaving her child with a non-Jewish or non-frum babysitter.

Being the majority is different from being like 1%.... In Israel she would probably have to look for a non Jewish babysitter. In other countries, she would have to look for a Jewish one very hard, not to mention a frum one!

mali

Sat, Jul 01 2006, 8:04 pm

mummyof6 wrote:

I'm amazed at this thread, because in EY, a frum woman would never dream of leaving her child with a non-Jewish or non-frum babysitter.

if you want you can start a thread about daycare centers - ma'on. is that a better option for a baby? Confused

Confused

happymom

Sat, Jul 01 2006, 9:31 pm

Quote:

I think the bottom line is, that every mother has to think what will make HER a better mother, and stop looking at what everyone else is doing

I think a very importnat point is missing here. The bottom line is, everyone needs to think what will make her a better mother, and her baby a HAPPY CHILD!!

mali

Sat, Jul 01 2006, 9:35 pm

happymom, u really make me laugh! you posted last thing b4 shabbos, and first thing when shabbos was over. were you sitting by the computer, thinking about this thread all day long? LOL

LOL

happymom

Sat, Jul 01 2006, 9:39 pm

no, lol. I am waiting for my husband to come home and dont want to start cleaning yet... Trust me I have many other things to think about Wink

Wink

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Forum -> Parenting our children

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