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Forum
-> The Social Scene
-> Chit Chat
Is happiness a choice ?
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| Yes |
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76% |
[ 38 ] |
| No |
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10% |
[ 5 ] |
| Other, elucidate below ... |
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14% |
[ 7 ] |
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| Total Votes : 50 |
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chocolate moose
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 Tue, Jun 08 2010, 4:20 pm
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mirror
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Tue, Jun 08 2010, 4:23 pm
Deleted.
Last edited by mirror on Wed, Jan 13 2016, 6:27 pm; edited 1 time in total
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yo'ma
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Tue, Jun 08 2010, 4:53 pm
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In a way! There are pessimists and optimists, so it really depends on how you look at things.
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ora_43
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Tue, Jun 08 2010, 5:00 pm
Sometimes.
There are many situations where people can make a choice to be happy, but that doesn't mean one can always be happy no matter what. (And sometimes it's davka better to be sad or angry (a time to laugh, a time to mourn... etc).)
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yiddishe vayb
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Tue, Jun 08 2010, 6:03 pm
| OPINIONATED wrote: | I used to cry and cry when I was married to my first husband.
I can't begin to describe it. |
I'm sorry you used to cry and cry I hope that is behind you. I feel for you...
just to clarify how does that answer the post? Are you saying that you chose to cry?
I'm confused... tell me more,
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lovemywig
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Tue, Jun 08 2010, 6:57 pm
| ora_43 wrote: | Sometimes.
There are many situations where people can make a choice to be happy, but that doesn't mean one can always be happy no matter what. (And sometimes it's davka better to be sad or angry (a time to laugh, a time to mourn... etc).) |
It all depends in the situation. Optimistic people can't always make a sad situation happy.
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yiddishe vayb
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Tue, Jun 08 2010, 7:06 pm
it's a choice but still not always possible.
Someone who R"L looses their entire family in a fire... they
can be happy they are alive... but it's not so simple.
So yes, it depends...
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challi
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Tue, Jun 08 2010, 7:16 pm
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I think its a choice for otherwise mentally healthy individuals. Sometimes its a hard choice, but a choice none the less.
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louche
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Tue, Jun 08 2010, 7:36 pm
| ora_43 wrote: | Sometimes.
There are many situations where people can make a choice to be happy, but that doesn't mean one can always be happy no matter what. (And sometimes it's davka better to be sad or angry (a time to laugh, a time to mourn... etc).) |
You have to differentiate between being happy right this second about whatever is going on right now, which is obviously neither possible nor appropriate (it would be most inappropriate to be happy at your parent's levaya, even if you had a choice, which under normal circumstances you don't) and between being a happy person in general. You can choose to be a happy person, meaning you look on the bright side, accentuate the positive, appreciate what you have, don't envy others, and refuse to wallow in negativity; or you can choose to be unhappy by doing the reverse.
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tzatza
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Tue, Jun 08 2010, 8:00 pm
| louche wrote: | | ora_43 wrote: | Sometimes.
There are many situations where people can make a choice to be happy, but that doesn't mean one can always be happy no matter what. (And sometimes it's davka better to be sad or angry (a time to laugh, a time to mourn... etc).) |
You have to differentiate between being happy right this second about whatever is going on right now, which is obviously neither possible nor appropriate (it would be most inappropriate to be happy at your parent's levaya, even if you had a choice, which under normal circumstances you don't) and between being a happy person in general. You can choose to be a happy person, meaning you look on the bright side, accentuate the positive, appreciate what you have, don't envy others, and refuse to wallow in negativity; or you can choose to be unhappy by doing the reverse. |
Couldn't say it better.
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Blue jay
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Tue, Jun 08 2010, 8:11 pm
Happiness is an illusion... We tend to label both ourselves and other people as being happy but really we are always changing and no one can really be truly a happy person all the time. If your chasing the euphoric feeling of "happiness" then you will become depressed over the littlest down turns in your life.
Its best to have emunah in Ha-shem and accept his good graces he bestows on us everyday.
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soulful music
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Wed, Jun 09 2010, 8:33 am
I thought this thread was discussing this book:
http://www.amazon.com/Happines.....07996
I loved the book, by the way, he has some good strategies in his chapter, "shortcuts".
I actually read it about 15 years ago so I cant elaborate.....
I would love to reread it, gotta go look for it.
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helena
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Wed, Jun 09 2010, 9:02 am
of course!
you can take every situation in life, and decide what you want to be!
Happy or sad
( I am not reffering to real sad thing. like someone died...)
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prettyone
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Wed, Jun 09 2010, 9:06 am
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to some extent yes it is but sometimes there can be something hormonal that is wrong and the person is depressed not by choice
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c.c.cookie
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Wed, Jun 09 2010, 2:01 pm
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Definitely yes. Otherwise, how can you explain the commandment "vesamachta bechagecha"? How can the Torah command us to be happy during a chag, if it's not a choice? Obviously it is a choice, though not always an easy one.
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Ruchel
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Wed, Jun 09 2010, 2:06 pm
CCookie that's what my dh says, that you can choose to be happy or not and to think of something (good/bad) or not. The shabbes after his dad died he decided he had to be happy for shabbes and not think of it and he did a normal regular shabbes.
I'm nowhere near that level though though some readings have helped me tremendously (Rbzin Jungreis books, I say everyone should read them! and Sarah Yoheved Rigler's book about the Rbzin Kramer).
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Basimcha
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Wed, Jun 09 2010, 2:48 pm
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Life is a test. We have lots of choices--and I think happiness is one of them!
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