DH going grey | Imamother

amother

Thu, Jul 15 2010, 4:10 am

My husband will be 26 soon and already has a lot of grey hairs. He is so self concious about it and all of his friends comment on it. It is allowed/normal for him to dye it??

How should he pick a dye that will be most natural. he is embarassed to buy it alone so I have to come with him!

Ruchel

Thu, Jul 15 2010, 4:17 am

Let him change his friends not his hair!!

He should ask a rav about dying. Some allow it for shidduchim so girls aren't turned off. Maybe for shalom bayit?

raspberry tea

Thu, Jul 15 2010, 4:22 am

amother wrote:

I think it's actually against halachah. At least from what I remember coming across. Better ask your rav.

smilethere

Thu, Jul 15 2010, 4:46 am

My husband is 25 and half bald in the front. Not much I can do about it as it is genetic. It doesn't look so bad because the back of his head is full, and so when wearing a hat (as he usually does out of the home) it is not noticeable.

My brother was half white at 27. At least his beard is still black because then people think you are so much older...

manhattanmom

Thu, Jul 15 2010, 5:21 am

When I first met dh--and he was 25 he was very noticeably grey/white. And now, 4 years later he's even more grey--like really really grey...
I think its charming!

But also, when we got married he did not have a beard. Now he does---mostly because his beard is ALL black so it makes him look younger--and people tend to not notice how grey he is because they look at the beard--But if/when the beard starts to turn....maybe he'll reconsider....

Last edited by manhattanmom on Thu, Jul 15 2010, 7:21 am; edited 1 time in total

amother

Thu, Jul 15 2010, 5:36 am

OP

I also dont mind the grey. My dh was actually just looking at dyes once at a pharmacy and this old israeli lady who worked there told him not to dye his hair. she said it made him look more manly!

freidasima

Thu, Jul 15 2010, 5:39 am

My dh is almost totally grey as is his beard and I think he is the most gorgeous and attractive (substitute s*%y) man in the whole world! (but he's almost 60..)

Ruchel

Thu, Jul 15 2010, 5:40 am

Ok, I remember my dad told me, at least in his times (he worked in fashion) hairdyes for men were VERY unhealthy and could cause various troubles. I don't know if it has changed, but worth looking into it.

raspberry tea

Thu, Jul 15 2010, 6:03 am

Oh yeah and I'm with those who think the grey can be handsome. My DH is salt and pepper now and I think it's lovely!

OheivYisrael

Thu, Jul 15 2010, 6:40 am

DH had grey when we dated too... at 21! Not much, though, but now he's 24 and it's spreading.

I like it, though, because it does make him look more, um, mature? Basically, it makes him look older than me and I'm self-concious about being 3 (2 in the Jewish calendar!) days older. :-)

jewels

Thu, Jul 15 2010, 6:52 am

My husband's also going gray and has been since he was about 30. Honestly I couldn't care less, in fact I like it and I agree with all of you that it makes a man look more distinguished. His friends do tease him about it- especially because he's more gray on the right side. They say because thats the side I talk to when he's driving LOL

Chana Miriam S

Thu, Jul 15 2010, 6:56 am

I have no idea what colour my husband's hair is. he has none to speak of!

yOungM0mmy

Thu, Jul 15 2010, 7:00 am

I think grey looks dignified...but DH (age 29) is balding and blonde, so it looks even thinner.

life'sgreat

Thu, Jul 15 2010, 7:14 am

Joining the grey (white really) hair club. My husband's been turning white for a few years and is not even 35 years old. I kinda like it.

kitov

Thu, Jul 15 2010, 7:19 am

No, I don't like it. I usually give my dh a haircut, so I keep on picking out the whits from his payos that are so far like, say, one white hair in 2 months. I daven to live together till 120 yrs plus, but I sooo want him to keep his color.

Is dye against halachs? Why?

raspberry tea

Thu, Jul 15 2010, 7:26 am

kitov wrote:

I'm pretty sure I came across that in the Shulchan Aruch before.

sunny90

Thu, Jul 15 2010, 7:32 am

My DH has a patch or two on the sides of his head where he has white hairs...and he's 21!
Apparently people in his mom's family go grey early, guess he got those genes! He likes it because it makes him look older, and I like it because it will make me look younger! (in the future) Plus, I think it's kind of cute.

PinkFridge

Thu, Jul 15 2010, 7:35 am

freidasima wrote:

My dh is almost totally grey as is his beard and I think he is the most gorgeous and attractive (substitute s*%y) man in the whole world! (but he's almost 60..)

Yeah, but we're at a different age. When I see the magazine covers I don't appreciate the under 40s, as a rule.

It's a pity it bothers him, but it's never helpful to negate or berate feelings, just helpful to help one deal with and get over them. He may want to talk to a sympathetic rav for a psak and chizuk. (Maybe steer him to a bald rav to help him count his blessings ;-)

good wifey

Thu, Jul 15 2010, 10:28 pm

My brother grew white / grey hair at the age of 17! He took a vitamin called Antioxidents. After 2 months he had no more of that growing. He did lots of research on this topic and bottom line was that young people, under 30, that grow white/grey hair it is some sort of nutrient deficiency. The antioxident filled it. Ask a nutritionist or health food shop if you are interested. Might be a help.