______ ______-alleged molestor

amother

Tue, Dec 07 2010, 10:15 am

re: "Rabbi ______ ______-alleged molestor" (title of thread)

Never before on Imamother, have I seen any scandals discussed with names of frum people. I've seen many posts angrily criticizing anything that can even somehow by chance connect a specific person to a negative story. Recently someone was outraged when a poster asked whose wedding it was with a 50 piece band that had thousands of views on Youtube....An anonymous poster couldnt tolerate that. They were outraged. How dare anyone ask the name despite thousands of people being at the wedding and thousands more viewing it on Youtube...If the Baalei Simcha wanted it a secret, they'd have removed the Youtube clip.

Why this publicity in this situation? Why is name-dropping ok here? Why the change? Why is this case different? I dont get it. Can someone clue me in. I cant believe that the names were allowed to be posted to "protect society"....

grace413

Tue, Dec 07 2010, 10:22 am

And the reason you are amother is......?

Personally, I think it's a shame we can't get together an Imamother Israel group together to find this person and make sure he goes back to America to face these charges. We have enough of our own problems here without people coming to E"Y to evade prosecution in other countries.

amother

Tue, Dec 07 2010, 10:36 am

grace413 wrote:

And the reason you are amother is......? .

Because it's an available lawful option. If it causes you pain, I'm sorry.

grace413 wrote:

Personally, I think it's a shame we can't get together an Imamother Israel group together to find this person and make sure he goes back to America to face these charges. We have enough of our own problems here without people coming to E"Y to evade prosecution in other countries.

You're right!

amother

Tue, Dec 07 2010, 11:03 am

saw50st8 wrote:

I'll tell you what - you err on the side of possibly not speaking or reading lashon hara.

I'll err on the side of protecting my children.

For G-d's sake, the guy is in hiding now. Hes nowhere near anyone's kids, except for possibly someone who is knowingly hiding him. If anything, photos should be distributed in Israel to locate him. Knowing his name wont help anyone other than blabbers.

groisamomma

Tue, Dec 07 2010, 11:07 am

amother wrote:

saw50st8 wrote:

I'll tell you what - you err on the side of possibly not speaking or reading lashon hara.

I'll err on the side of protecting my children.

How do you expect he'll be found if not by publicizing his name on his photo flier?

mom4life

Tue, Dec 07 2010, 11:10 am

saw50st8 wrote:

I'll tell you what - you err on the side of possibly not speaking or reading lashon hara.

I'll err on the side of protecting my children.

amother

Tue, Dec 07 2010, 11:14 am

How will knowing his NAME protect your children? You wont allow your chilren to go to that house? The children under 18 were removed, only the mother and children over 18 remain. They havent been accused of anything. They arent the age for playing with your kids.

amother

Tue, Dec 07 2010, 11:29 am

groisamomma wrote:

amother wrote:

saw50st8 wrote:

I'll tell you what - you err on the side of possibly not speaking or reading lashon hara.

I'll err on the side of protecting my children.

How do you expect he'll be found if not by publicizing his name on his photo flier?

If he's walking around in Israel, he is NOT wearing a name tag! Idea

HindaRochel

Tue, Dec 07 2010, 11:37 am

groisamomma wrote:

amother wrote:

saw50st8 wrote:

I'll tell you what - you err on the side of possibly not speaking or reading lashon hara.

I'll err on the side of protecting my children.

How do you expect he'll be found if not by publicizing his name on his photo flier?

His photo is more important than his name, but his name is important if we are to relay the information to the police. Also there is a possibility that someone in Israel knows him by name.

I have no problem with publishing either as long as we don't assume guilt. We should assume nothing aside from the fact that he is wanted, his son is wanted, and we should do nothing except if we see him /know whereabouts to call the police and tell them where he is.

Sweet Valley Gal

Tue, Dec 07 2010, 12:33 pm

amother wrote:

he still has 2 others sons here that didnt flee. so if we know the name we can be aware of them

Merrymom

Tue, Dec 07 2010, 2:00 pm

amother wrote:

saw50st8 wrote:

I'll tell you what - you err on the side of possibly not speaking or reading lashon hara.

I'll err on the side of protecting my children.

How can you possibly know that? Not to mention, do you think that the family or neigbors of the people protecting him don't have a right to know what he's accused of?

ora_43

Tue, Dec 07 2010, 2:07 pm

I know I said this in the other thread, but I think OP that you have it backwards. The right way is not to erase the name and have a long thread about

____ alleged molester.

Instead we should have

NAME alleged _____

the name and face which is l'toelet, the general sense of what he's wanted for which is l'toelet, but the details and the conversation, no.

HindaRochel

Tue, Dec 07 2010, 2:10 pm

ora_43 wrote:

Agree. Keeping in mind he and sons may be innocent of the charges.

RachelB

Wed, Dec 08 2010, 3:06 am

grace413 wrote:

I'll help! And in cases of convicted! or proved molesters (and I don't mean by just a a US court), we should post pictures and names and addresses in every yeshiva in the world so it's harder for them to find victims.

amother

Wed, Dec 08 2010, 10:20 am

The only reason I wouldn't want the names publicized, as a victim from my own father, I wouldn't want my name out there. Some newspapers did not name the accused for this reason. However, this low life does not care about his kids and ran off and since he is wanted his name is all over. My father was never put behind bars, if he landed there you would never be meshadech with our family. Its all you people that are in denial, claim mesira, cry loshon hora, blame the victim, and protect the molesters cause abuse to continue to happen to our children. Sorry, I am venting, but we victims have had more than enough.

sarahd

Wed, Dec 08 2010, 10:30 am

I don't think anyone here claimed mesira, blamed any victims, denied that something horrible may have gone on here or tried to protect any accused molesters. However, I didn't see (maybe I missed it) anything on any of these threads that would be helpful to either the victims or anyone trying to apprehend the perpetrator.

Merrymom

Wed, Dec 08 2010, 12:59 pm

sarahd wrote:

You're talking about the past, how about future victims cv"?

ora_43

Wed, Dec 08 2010, 1:12 pm

Merrymom wrote:

sarahd wrote:

You're talking about the past, how about future victims cv"?

I don't think it would be helpful to future victims to know that if they complain, their names will be publicly revealed and their tragedy will be discussed online by random strangers.