What is your background?

Crayon210

Thu, Feb 02 2006, 12:34 pm

But I imagine there are some shuls where your husband would feel completely uncomfortable, or poskim that your family would not feel comfortable using. That's a subtle definition as well.

I do have connections with BP and know that people go from shul to shul. I was talking about a different community setup than BP. But there also, I'm sure there are some shuls that would not be considered at all...

red sea

Thu, Feb 02 2006, 12:48 pm

Just adding to crayons line of thought here.

I think there is no need to "label", - as a jew who lives life according to the torah is a frum jew

but -

I don't think it is un-pc to inquire -

each "type" actually is a whole jewish sub-culture with (sometimes very) different customs and such.

It doesn't deem anyone more or less jewish.

It does not even imply a level of observance.

I think it is just a curiosity of differences within the jewish realm at large.

timeout

Thu, Feb 02 2006, 12:49 pm

In BP my husband personally would feel comfortable everywhere since B'H we have many Kiddashim to go to on Shabbos my husband hops around and there's always at least one person who knows him or his family Very Happy

Even when we went to CH for Shabbos when my husband went to 770 to daven there were quite a few people who knew his grandfather since he taught in Oholei Torah.

In Philadelphia where my husband sticks out since he wears a Bekeshe he still feels comfortable and everybody else does too! He doesn't tell anyone what to do or how to do it and became very good friends with my parents congregation in the shul.

shira

Thu, Feb 02 2006, 1:31 pm

I guess I'm a little confused.........These "labels" are names for communities/lifestyles that people identify themselves with. No one is saying that one is better than the other. I think that diversity is so beautiful when we with our differences can live in harmony. I live in Beitar which is predominantly chassidish though there are many "flavors". There's Yerushalmi, every chassidus under the sun, litvish, sefardi, etc. etc. In my building alone there are 4 litvishe families, 2 chassidish, 1 yerushalmi, and 1 sefardi- and its a GREAT building!!!!! The nicest thing about Beitar is that desipite the tremendous diversity here, there is little to no politics. Its hard to run an accurate pole because these categories are very fluid and obviously subject to how each person defines the categories but all in all, I think that diversity makes us yiddin interesting. I've learned SO MUCH from my different neighbors and am absolutely fascinated by the different minhagim/hanhagos that are so diffent from mine but just as beloved by haShem.
Just my $.02.

amother

Thu, Feb 02 2006, 4:45 pm

Quote:

Crayon210 wrote:
But it does mean we need to look at ourselves and say, why do I do what I do? Where am I holding? What are my values and beliefs? And based on that, a spiritual community can be chosen.

That is easy for you to say! Judaism is not black and white. Not everyone fits into a category. There are many types of "streams" and not fitting into one particular one does not mean there is something "wrong"!
On the contrary, IMHO, the fact that people are categorized to a certain extent is a chisaron! Some think they are "the best" "the only derech"..and forget to focus on Ahavas Yisrael!

timeout

Thu, Feb 02 2006, 5:04 pm

Adding to the thread which has now turned into "Where do u belong"?

Maybe it's an out of towner thing but where I grew up there were 3 shuls. The rich shul lawyers doctors etc...beautiful building, than a small shul like shteeble and mine regular people young couples and older concentration camp survivors, my mother blending in nicely since she is a DP camp survivor.

The shul my parents went to had a proper Rabbi who was from Europe and was amazing and could relate everyone, there were all types some were shomer shabbos and some were not our Rebbe would have never defined any person other than saying "they have a yiddishe Neshoma" "what else do u need to know"? (Rabbi Leizerowski zt"l who was a talmid and lived with the Chofetz Chaim).

amother

Thu, Feb 02 2006, 5:18 pm

Motek wrote:

Quote:

That is easy for you to say!

what do you mean? shouldn't each of us be asking ourselves those questions: why do I do what I do? where am I holding? what are my values and beliefs? Scratching Head

I was referring to belonging to a community.

Crayon210

Thu, Feb 02 2006, 5:55 pm

amother wrote:

That is easy for you to say!

If only you knew the irony of your statement. It has not been an easy thing for me. I struggled with identity for a long time. But I guess it's easy for someone to anonymously post something presumptuous like that.

amother wrote:

not fitting into one particular one does not mean there is something "wrong"!

It's not wrong, but I suppose that being "stam a Jew" feels good until you have a shaila, or have to answer your kids' questions...

amother wrote:

On the contrary, IMHO, the fact that people are categorized to a certain extent is a chisaron! Some think they are "the best" "the only derech"..and forget to focus on Ahavas Yisrael!

I know all the cutesy phrases about categorizing being a chisaron. I disagree. This has always been the Jewish reality. We were from twelve tribes who each had their own derech (according to some, even their own nuschaos tefila!), and no one was like, Hey, Reuven, let's forget about this and just become ReuvenShimon. That's silly. Why sacrifice your special identity to become part of an unrecognizable mass?

I already addressed your issue about superiority and lack of Ahavas Yisroel:

Crayon210 wrote:

I think that it's good to define oneself as long as it doesn't lead to negativity.

gryp

Thu, Feb 02 2006, 11:04 pm

Quote:

what a post!!! Smile

amother

Thu, Feb 02 2006, 11:23 pm

Crayon210 wrote:

amother wrote:

That is easy for you to say!

amother wrote:

not fitting into one particular one does not mean there is something "wrong"!

It's not wrong, but I suppose that being "stam a Jew" feels good until you have a shaila, or have to answer your kids' questions...

amother wrote:

On the contrary, IMHO, the fact that people are categorized to a certain extent is a chisaron! Some think they are "the best" "the only derech"..and forget to focus on Ahavas Yisrael!

Crayon210 wrote:

I think that it's good to define oneself as long as it doesn't lead to negativity.

good points crayon210, I see what you're saying. I never thought of it in that light.

Blossom

Fri, Feb 03 2006, 12:37 am

Hey Ya!! You left out the Heimish and the Modern chassidish. That ain't fair, I'm not voting Sad

. LOL
I probably belong to many. What makes you belong to a certain group. Going to a certain shul? sending your kids to their schools? following a certain rebbe or derech or minhagim? ones Levush?
Once I know that I'll can decide where to cast my vote LOL.

Ruchel

Tue, Oct 31 2006, 6:01 pm

Marion wrote:

I'm still confused. My lineage? What we do now? How I was raised? I could fall into ALL those categories...

Same.

Lineage: 3 grandparents raised chassidic (Poland). 1 raised Orthodox Sephardic (Greece).

Raised: Mo Ashkenazic, with little bits of Salonician traditions from my grandmother (mainly food & culture)

What I do: Mo Ashkenazic machmir

Go to: plain Orthodox shul, would go to any Orthodox shul but a preference for Ashk. rite

School: went to public school because the Jewish schools my parents tried to send me to were too full (1 plain Orthodox and 1 MO Ashkenazic). Will send kids to any frum school, but Ashk. would be a great thing.

So, not voting...