Leaving your cart in line when grocery (vent)

amother

Wed, Jan 25 2012, 10:34 pm

I live in NY and I see this trend happening more and more. When grocery shopping, people will leave their cart in line, and then go get "one more item", while their cart holds their place for them. I understand if you legitimately forgot something and want to run and get it, but Inevitably people end up going around the store getting a bunch of items, and holding up the line. Then if someone pushes the cart to the side and goes ahead, since why should the whole store have to wait for you to finish your shopping, the person gets annoyed that you went ahead of them and they were supposed to be first. I find this so frustrating. Why do people go on line if they still have a bunch more items to get? Do they not value anyone else's time? Just venting because I am getting annoyed from waiting behind loaded ownerless carts. Any thoughts or suggestions?

groisamomma

Wed, Jan 25 2012, 10:41 pm

To run and get ONE item that a person reminded themselves about is fine, but to "reserve" your space and keep shopping is selfish and disrespectful to other shoppers. I deliberately move the cart aside FAR away and get in line, usually with people continuing the line behind me. If the person comes back with one thing I'll explain and let them get in ahead but if they come back laden with stuff and ready to turn around and keep shopping, I leave the cart where I pushed it and make it clear loudly that they lost their spot for good, or at least until I'm done checking out.

Someone tried to call me on it once and I asked her if she wanted me to help her shop as well. Another time two teenagers did it and I asked them if nobody taught them basic kavod haberiyos.

BTW, it's these same people that will send one child to wait in line at the rides on Chol Hamoed and then, two minutes before their turn, will send eight more kids to join that one child already in line. Same idea.

Fabulous

Wed, Jan 25 2012, 10:42 pm

All I can say is that I totally agree! I had this a month or so back that the girl in front of me had unloaded most of her cart and filled the conveyer and then "forgot" something. She took such a long time that the cashier rung up all the items on the belt and we had to wait for her to come back and finish unloading her cart and her "extra" stuff. I expressed to her that it wasn't fair. She didn't even say sorry, just that she had to get something. Ridiculous!! (BTW, this was in a big Jewish supermarket and she was about 18 and frum)

chavamom

Wed, Jan 25 2012, 10:50 pm

Don't get me started on what goes on in Walmart in the mountains in the summer. There are long lines, so people show up with a group, one gets in line with one item. The rest go shopping, they show up (4, 5, more) of them and tell you "I'm with her" and drag all their carts in front of you! I told some woman last summer (with 3 teenagers with her - all checking out separately) "no, I"m sorry, you were not here..." and she just ignored me. It's such a chutzpah.

supermama2

Wed, Jan 25 2012, 10:55 pm

I understand how totally frustrating this is...ah but we just need to overcome these 'tests' so we can move along to focus on higher things and closness to HKBH. A little mussar for myself!!

groisamomma

Wed, Jan 25 2012, 10:57 pm

SarahO. wrote:

I understand how totally frustrating this is...ah but we just need to overcome these 'tests' so we can move along to focus on higher things and closness to HKBH. A little mussar for myself!!

Such as?

chavamom

Wed, Jan 25 2012, 11:09 pm

Just an observation. I don't have this experience with non jews. When was the last time "Sally Shiksa" got in line and then had 5 friends that came and said "I'm with her" and pushed 5 carts in front of you? So why do [some] Jews think this is OK?????

Mommastuff

Wed, Jan 25 2012, 11:11 pm

OP, I totally hear ya! I usually go shopping with a kid so I can't go run and get "one more thing". I can't leave my kid in the cart, and the store is usually too crowded to hold the kid in one hand and grab the item(s) in my other hand and still squeeze through the winding long waiting lines.

I have once moved in front of an empty cart because the "owner" of the cart wasn't there when the line was moving. It wasn't malicious though. I asked as few people if it was theirs and no one knew to whom it belonged. I was already putting my stuff on the belt when she returned.

If you need a few more things, check out first then go back and get into the quick check out lane!!

Mommastuff

Wed, Jan 25 2012, 11:14 pm

chavamom wrote:

Actually, I have and I wasn't about to start up with the non jews (whom were bigger than I anyway). But it definately few and far between (except Xmas season)

peppermint

Wed, Jan 25 2012, 11:22 pm

chavamom wrote:

It happened to me with non-Jews!
I once got on line in a non jewish store and the man in front of me had an empty cart. His wife and daughter went shopping and kept filling his cart.

September June

Wed, Jan 25 2012, 11:28 pm

chavamom wrote:

I've had non Jews cut me in line before.

Nicole

Thu, Jan 26 2012, 12:10 am

positive story: I was checking out and forgot one thing. I asked the girl behind me if she minds if I run to get one more thing. She said sure and then she offered to keep loading my things onto the belt while I was gone.
I thought this was so kind of her.

chavamom

Thu, Jan 26 2012, 12:13 am

I knew people were going to say "A [gentile] cut in front of me once!" OK, I'm sure that has happened to me to on occasion. I'm talking about there are segments of Jewish society where they think this is normal. Get the difference? Is this some New York thing I don't know about?

de_goldy

Thu, Jan 26 2012, 12:15 am

I see this often too and I just go right ahead of the cart (or push it out of the line).

The "I'm with her" really gets to me too.

Not to mention people who ask someone if they can go in front without asking all the other ppl in the line!

September June

Thu, Jan 26 2012, 12:21 am

chavamom wrote:

Disclaimer: I don't usually shop in Heimish stores. I also have never been to Walmart in the Catskills.

I never had a Jew or non-Jew cut me in the grocery. I did have people (both Jews and non-Jews) offer to let me go in front of them if they saw I only had a few items.

I've had a lot of line cutting experiences in amusement parks. Usually by non-Jews (only once by a group of Jewish girls). Only in the NY area.

Marion

Thu, Jan 26 2012, 12:57 am

So Israeli...I'm sorry to see it's made its way to the other side of the ocean as well. Here they do it at the post office, the bank, and the kupah as well as the supermarket.

There was a "funny" YouTube on the matter a couple of weeks ago.

imaima

Thu, Jan 26 2012, 8:51 am

amother wrote:

I fit happened to me, I would let the cart hold the place, but it was time to pay and the owner is not there, the cart would have to go out of the line.

amother

Thu, Jan 26 2012, 8:54 am

chavamom wrote:

I had this experience with representatives of other ethnical minorities that are as "cliquey" as Jews are. Unfortunately, they were not brought up with the fear of hillul Hashem.

moonstone

Thu, Jan 26 2012, 2:41 pm

mizle10 wrote:

I was gonna say the same thing... ISRAELI!! Irks me every time... You try telling them you were here first and they look at you like you fell off the moon.

Yeah, I was sure this thread was going to be about shopping in Israel. I had no idea that this happens in chul too!