Seminary for dd | Imamother

amother

Sun, Nov 11 2012, 5:11 pm

Hi my dd is in 12th grade in a BY school. DH and I want her to go to Israel really badly-we want her to have the experience, and she agreed to go (but very very scared which is why she only agreed and isn't dying to go) She's looking for something not too academic and not too yeshivish. Dd spoke to her principal and teachers who suggested Nachlas, Binas and Seminar. Anyone can help us out over here? She is regular BY girl, maybe a drop more left-wing. After researching a little, she says binas is too yeshivish. Anyone have children there who can tell me? And she also is worried that Nachlas is too jappy. and that seminar is too out-of-towny...anybody can suggest other ideas or give some practical information about these seminaries? I went to a few open-houses and to be quite honest, they all sounded exactly the same but dd said they're so not. So now we're really lost. TIA

PinkFridge

Sun, Nov 11 2012, 7:25 pm

Interesting, I haven't heard Seminar's out of towny. Though maybe it's by comparisons. There are proportionally so many in towners that most sems would have a lot of NYers, I'd think.
Talk to her principals. In many, many schools, the principals and teachers have a handle on which sems are appropriate to apply to.
One quick note: I'm grateful to have been able to send girls to sem in E"Y. Please don't get me wrong. But you say she's apprehensive. Are there any chutz la'aretz programs that get her excited? It might really be worth exploring with her.

amother

Sun, Nov 11 2012, 7:48 pm

OP here. She would rather stay here and do college and seminary half day but I think its just her fears that are preventing her from wanting to go. She says that's why she doesn't want to go. She agreed because I told her there will be family that is taking care of her there and we will visit her at some point. She's scared of the culture and things because she hasn't been there when she was older. I think the local seminaries don't provide the students with an experience like E"Y does and dh and I feel its important for her to have the real experience

PinkFridge

Mon, Nov 12 2012, 8:22 am

Thanks for clarifying.
As incredible as E"Y is, I don't think we should minimize the opportunities for growth in chu"l combined with a solid Israel experience mid year, summer, for Tishrei, etc. Of course it's not the same as a full year program but it's still powerful.
It sounds like money's not an issue because you say that she hasn't been there yet. Most kids haven't unless the family has the means. So why not find other ways for her to go?
It also sounds like this is your first. Lesson for life with all your kids: chanoch l'naar. Just because one does what's good for him/her doesn't mean everyone will do exactly the same. It might be that local will work for her. Or maybe not. Just make sure she's totally on board with where she ends up. Encourage her to talk to girls currently in the several seminaries she's most likely to apply to. Encourage her to go to seminary open houses, even if she might not be so sure about certain sems to give her a feel for what she'll encounter in general. Remind her that none of this represents commitment. In the next few weeks till the applications have to go in, she might thaw and actually get excited.

rachel91

Mon, Nov 12 2012, 8:41 am

Chochmas lev, bnos chava, I don't know if bya would be too yeshivish...as far as I know the first 2 I mentioned are a bit less yeshivish. And chochmas lev is not too academic. Pninim could be suitable, but I once heard bad things about it.

amother

Mon, Nov 12 2012, 9:08 am

theres a new seminary that opened this past year which is kind of in btw binas and pninim called keser chaya sounsd sort of what your daughter might be looking for,its run by the same ppl and has dif principal
heard great stuff about it

amother

Mon, Nov 12 2012, 9:38 am

I only went to sem a couple of years back, and it seems that the less yeshivish less academic sems were peninim, chochmas lev.

Nachlas, Bnos Sara, Bnos Chava, BYA, Seminar, Machon Raaya, Mesores Rochel (and of course BJJ) were the more right wing and or/academic.

PinkFridge

Mon, Nov 12 2012, 11:30 am

Is Chochmas Lev still around? Very positive vibes but I thought it was history.
Re Peninim: I don't want to open up a can of worms but I'll say this - it's always been known to have had the best teachers and wonderful program. I've heard that they're being careful with admissions this year, so they may have a different image than some are left with. If anyone has real info, and OP makes it clear she needs to know, maybe you could ask her to PM you.

oohlala

Mon, Nov 12 2012, 11:38 am

I'm so suprised that you're pushing to spend so much money to send her to Israel when she really isn't that psyched to go. There are many more quality seminaries around the NY area (Reb. Assaf, Reb. Finer, etc.) than when I was sem age (about 15 years ago). Had there been, I'd probably would have stayed home, and many more of my friends would have too.

abby1776

Mon, Nov 12 2012, 2:54 pm

Its very scary to go away from home for an extended period of time ify ou have never done it before - has your daughter been to sleepaway camp?

Maybe the best thing for her would be to go on a summer program and see if she likes it - it is short, you have all sorts of great expereiences, and maybe she will get a taste of EY and want to go to seminary.

amother

Mon, Nov 12 2012, 3:07 pm

I went to Pninim, its sister schools with Seminar but much less academic wise (I went for a Seminar interview and struggled interpreting a 5000 word ramban so Mrs Flam suggested Pninim...I was insulted but I am so happy she did). I am sure Pninim has changed in the last 5 years but in my year they had girls from all over the world. They were not BY per say but I think thats the crowd Rabbi Meisels was aiming for. I was the only bklyn girl my year and I loved loved that!!!! it was frum out of town perfect! I made a lot of friends, some I even still keep in touch with Smile

. I heard the price has gone up a lot since my year. I made a kesher with the teachers and still in touch with one of them. I recommend Pninim for anyone who doesnt want to be in the cookie cutter bais yaakov seminary but still wants a frum school that will teach hashkafa and halacha and of course have trips and great staff etc.

wife2

Mon, Nov 12 2012, 10:34 pm

chochmas lev is closed.
nachlas is more yeshivish than seminar. seminar has more open-minded girls. it is not too out of towny. girls from out of town and girls that are with it as well. not too stressful, fun ppl. is your daughter looking for a more chilled environment that is more relaxed about rules? peninim gives more hashkafa and is not as text based as some of these frummer seminaries

cityofgold

Wed, Nov 21 2012, 4:07 pm

I am laughing at the "out-of-towny" line. From what I've seen, that isn't possible unless it is a very small school. Most schools are either more NY/in-town, or a mix. But the mixes are usually still more in favor of the tri-state area.

Almost all seminaries seem to have a lot of homework & tests unless explicitly stated otherwise.

Have you considered the half-year programs? I think there are 2 of them--they are for about 4.5 months and are the regular seminary experience, just half as long.

amother

Thu, Nov 22 2012, 2:37 am

city of gold: the half year program is the biggest rip off of your money! they make it seem like its half the money but in reality its not! their is curretnly one that iknow of lahav the other one closed down. so anyone who sends there daughter shud think twice b/c generally the girls finish the half year and want more so then what.... speaking as someone who works in the seminary world

amother

Thu, Nov 22 2012, 5:43 am

Firstly, It sounds like an out-of-towny, BY seminary would be perfect for what she is looking for.

Secondly I agree with everyone else that you shouldnt discount more local programs for her. It sounds like she is different to you and DH in mindset, and what might be 'the real experience' for you...may be scary and uncomfortable for her. The goal should be that she, 'goes, grows, and has a great time', wherever that may be.

Thirdly, if you do want a suggestion of a seminary in Israel... try Afikei Torah (which is sister schools with Darchai Bina and what was, CHOCHMAS LEV) are are changing next year to be opening as Lev Bais Yaakov. I imagine it will in part fill the gap of chochmas lev, and may fit the bill.