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Forum -> Relationships -> Manners & Etiquette
Why would a man have a different surname from his mother?
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HindaRochel




 
 
    
 

Post Sun, Feb 03 2013, 8:18 am
How in the world would anyone on this board know and why do you care?
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amother


 

Post Sun, Feb 03 2013, 8:49 am
My dad's mother who also was 92 when she passed away last week, had a different surname to my dad. She was widowed when my dad was in his 20s and remarried when he was in his 40s. There was no question of him taking his stepfather's surname, but she wanted to use her new married name. Despite marrying in her early 70s with a husband in his 80s they were married for 17 happy years!
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Isramom8




 
 
    
 

Post Sun, Feb 03 2013, 8:53 am
I know a man who, toghether with his wife, took on a completely new family name when they got married. You have that option in Israel, and many couples take it. Upon marriage registration, you are asked to provide a "family name" of your choice.
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zaq




 
 
    
 

Post Sun, Feb 03 2013, 8:57 am
amother wrote:


t I am only wondering and just don't want to ask my friend himself that's all


I should hope not, because it's NONE of your business. But as the posters above have shown, there are more perfectly respectable reasons for the discrepancy than questionable ones. How old are you and what sort of community do you come from? I'm curious because you sound as if you either have amazingly little life experience or come from a majorly non-Western society. I think most Westerners, unless they come from a country where married women retain their birth names, would assume the mother had been widowed and remarried and think nothing of it.
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zaq




 
 
    
 

Post Sun, Feb 03 2013, 8:58 am
amother wrote:
My dad's mother who also was 92 when she passed away last week, had a different surname to my dad. She was widowed when my dad was in his 20s and remarried when he was in his 40s. There was no question of him taking his stepfather's surname, but she wanted to use her new married name. Despite marrying in her early 70s with a husband in his 80s they were married for 17 happy years!



AWWWW....
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Sherri




 
 
    
 

Post Sun, Feb 03 2013, 9:59 am
Isramom8 wrote:
I know a man who, toghether with his wife, took on a completely new family name when they got married. You have that option in Israel, and many couples take it. Upon marriage registration, you are asked to provide a "family name" of your choice.
Why do so many people do that?
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amother


 

Post Sun, Feb 03 2013, 10:27 am
Cuz it's a hername
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amother


 

Post Sun, Feb 03 2013, 10:28 am
Not a sirname
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33055




 
 
    
 

Post Sun, Feb 03 2013, 10:38 am
Isramom8 wrote:
I know a man who, toghether with his wife, took on a completely new family name when they got married. You have that option in Israel, and many couples take it. Upon marriage registration, you are asked to provide a "family name" of your choice.


You can do this in NY also. You can change your first and middle names also upon marriage.Spouses can take on different surnames. The rules are libral and private. There is no publication requirement.
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rachel91




 
 
    
 

Post Sun, Feb 03 2013, 11:24 am
amother wrote:
NotInNJMommy wrote:
She is from Quebec? I understand that ones legal name doesn't change for marriage as a rule. Even if she goes by the married name socially, legally she keeps her maiden name, no?


well she was born in Germany but I am only wondering and just don't want to ask my friend himself that's all


well you got a few answers here (possible answers), but noone will be able to tell you better than your friend, so if you don't want to ask him you'll have to speculate further.
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zaq




 
 
    
 

Post Sun, Feb 03 2013, 11:42 am
amother wrote:
Cuz it's a hername


Love it!
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roika




 
 
    
 

Post Sun, Feb 03 2013, 2:23 pm
winter_rose wrote:
My nieces have a different surname from my brother and their mother. They decided to give them my mom's maiden name because her only brother had no children.


how would that help matters - won't they change it once they marry - and their kids will have their father's name....
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Isramom8




 
 
    
 

Post Sun, Feb 03 2013, 2:36 pm
Sherri wrote:
Isramom8 wrote:
I know a man who, toghether with his wife, took on a completely new family name when they got married. You have that option in Israel, and many couples take it. Upon marriage registration, you are asked to provide a "family name" of your choice.
Why do so many people do that?


Since the establishment of the State, a lot of people wanted more Israeli sounding names, rather than Yiddish/European sounding, for one thing. Most Prime Ministers changed their last names. I think even the families of Harav Shach and Harav Elyashiv took on these more Ivrit sounding names than the names the families had beforehand.

On the flip side, I know families that have switched from modern Hebrew last names back to the original Yiddish family names.
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