Maris ayin? | Imamother

elisecohen

Wed, May 11 2005, 6:56 pm

For reasons I won't get into here, I'm not allowed medically to eat grain-based foods right now including bread, so when I have to go to a lunch meeting and want to take a sandwich, I use rice bread with no ingredients except rice flours and water. Just to look at the sandwich, you wouldn't know what it's made from. Now, I can't wash on rice bread, but in this setting it wouldn't be appropriate for me to stop and say to others that this bread is in no way halachically "bread." There are other Jewish women at these meetings, and I'm not sure if it's maris ayin for me to do this or what I should do. I don't want them to think it's okay to eat real bread without washing (and there are women who are Jewish but only somewhat observant in this particular setting). Any opinions or suggestions?

Pickle Lady

Wed, May 11 2005, 7:28 pm

Sometimes some breads are mezonos so you don't have to wash for them.

I don't think it mari ayin. Also maybe you had a small piece of bread before you meal that you washed for. Nobody watches you every second. I say eat your sandwich adn say the proper brachos and don't worry.

lucy

Wed, May 11 2005, 10:27 pm

I don't want to sound too technical, but really if you are eating a certain ammount of mezonote bread then you do have to wash. For example: 1 slice of pizza no, but 2 slice you have to wash! Though I don't know if this would apply for rice bread, probably not, so I just wasted you reading time embarrassed

I'de kind of pretend!

queenie

Thu, May 12 2005, 5:53 pm

Do you really think people pay that much attention to what others do? How nosey are these people? I'd let them wonder if they are such yentas. Don't they think you are a frum enough woman to know whether or not you should wash?

I wouldn't fake it. Then they definitely will be talking about you when they find out the truth. It will mean that you didn't tell them the truth and basically lied to them by pretending. You don't need to explain yourself but faking it is immature and dishonest.

amother

Thu, May 12 2005, 7:05 pm

If it looks like bread, it is bread, so ask your Rav.

Or even better, get something that does not look like bread & announce loud & clear that you developed grain intolerance.

Nobody needs to know exactly why you do not tolerate bread.

elisecohen

Fri, May 13 2005, 7:16 am

If it looks like bread, it is bread, so ask your Rav.

Quote:

I have been told by halachic sources that this is true only when it contains wheat, oats, barley, spelt or rye. While we do say a brocho of mezonos on rice itself, rice flour and products made from it only receives a brocho of shahakol, and one may not wash on it. In fact, On Shabbos and Yom Tov I must make sure to begin my meals with either whole rice or with pear (the only fruit I may eat) so that my meals will count as Shabbos seudahs of which we must halachically partake--using rice bread does not count for this for I may only say a brocho of shehakol on it.

indianamom4

Mon, May 16 2005, 1:47 am

Elise-
My 5 year old daughter is gluten-intolderant and she always is asking me about whether or not she can wash, and she always comes home from school telling me about who washed for lunch that day. We asked our rabbi about washing on rice bread or not for chinuch purposes and he said not to. it isnt one of the grains that needs to be washed on. she does sometimes say that she wants to wash, but when she cheats she gets huge stomachaches!

elisecohen

Mon, May 16 2005, 7:33 am

I can definitely relate to that--my youngest two boys have eosinophilic enteropathy. When the 6 year old gets accidentally exposed to food we definitely know it! Fortunately he never cheats deliberately, but I'm told many children do at around age 7...So I'm afraid he may start soon.
Thanks so much for the confirmation of what your Rav said. It's always good to hear about different rabbeim thinking along the same lines in these unusual shailohs.