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-> Chinuch, Education & Schooling
Barbara
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 Tue, Dec 31 2013, 6:29 pm
Straightforward question.
Why do you care what the parents of other kids in the schools your children attend wear?
I'm sitting her, sick to my stomach at the nasty, derogatory terms that women here use to describe other women. "Don't send your kids to that school. The mothers dress like sluts." "I'm not considering another school, the parents are bums."
Do you honestly think that there are women turning tricks at night, and sending their little Moishele off to yeshiva the next morning?
Don't you think that the SCHOOL -- you know, the quality of the teachers, the curriculum, the physical plant -- is more important than whether some woman with kids at the school, whom your kids will probably never see, covers her knees? Not to mention more influential.
And how do you feel knowing that if your kids weren't accepted at a school, it may be because there's some woman here thinking that you dress like a slut and a bum?
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Maya
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Tue, Dec 31 2013, 6:35 pm
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It's part of the insularity. If a mother dresses like a bum, chances are that she will dress her daughters like bums, and then my daughter will also want to dress like those bummy daughters in her class, and then my daughter is exposed to people who dress differently than she does. How can I let that happen? We're all supposed to be clones of one another.
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bamamama
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Tue, Dec 31 2013, 6:42 pm
| Barbara wrote: |
Do you honestly think that there are women turning tricks at night, and sending their little Moishele off to yeshiva the next morning?
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And even in the unlikely event that's the case, rachmanus, rachmanus, rachmanus. There but for the grace of God and all that...
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sequoia
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Tue, Dec 31 2013, 6:44 pm
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I dress like a bum. D@mn moths!
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bamamama
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Tue, Dec 31 2013, 6:46 pm
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What exactly does it mean to "dress like a bum" anyway? Leaving aside the derogatory term "bum" meaning homeless person...
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amother
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Tue, Dec 31 2013, 6:46 pm
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I am that amother that wrote up the post ur talking about and those schools that I said are bummy I mean that my friends 8 yr old came home dropping f bombs and knowing songs that had inappropriate words and trying so hard to show the world that they're "cool" bikinis on the beach type. And btw yes I was in Miami an saw a family from that school there but mom was wearing a bandana go figure..... I don't want my kids to get confused about what is and isn't ok
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bamamama
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Tue, Dec 31 2013, 6:50 pm
| amother wrote: | | I am that amother that wrote up the post ur talking about and those schools that I said are bummy I mean that my friends 8 yr old came home dropping f bombs and knowing songs that had inappropriate words and trying so hard to show the world that they're "cool" bikinis on the beach type. And btw yes I was in Miami an saw a family from that school there but mom was wearing a bandana go figure..... I don't want my kids to get confused about what is and isn't ok |
OMG a bandana!!!!!!!!!! No wonder.
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Cookie Monster
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Tue, Dec 31 2013, 6:54 pm
| amother wrote: | | I am that amother that wrote up the post ur talking about and those schools that I said are bummy I mean that my friends 8 yr old came home dropping f bombs and knowing songs that had inappropriate words and trying so hard to show the world that they're "cool" bikinis on the beach type. And btw yes I was in Miami an saw a family from that school there but mom was wearing a bandana go figure..... I don't want my kids to get confused about what is and isn't ok |
I wouldn't send my kid to the school you went to. They obviously do not teach how not to use run-on sentences.
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vintagebknyc
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Tue, Dec 31 2013, 7:09 pm
| sequoia wrote: | | I dress like a bum. D@mn moths! |
gah, don't get me started. in BK we have these special ones that specifically eat cashmere! the horror! I try to look chic and I end up looking like a bum.
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amother
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Tue, Dec 31 2013, 7:19 pm
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Lol u misunderstood me she was wearing a bikini while wearing a bandana. Yes I went to a school that was terrible hence my Rubin sentences. Yes I'm sure ppl may think I'm a slut but the school didn't except me because of he yeshiva my hub went ro
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amother
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Tue, Dec 31 2013, 7:19 pm
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Lol u misunderstood me she was wearing a bikini while wearing a bandana. Yes I went to a school that was terrible hence my Rubin sentences. Yes I'm sure ppl may think I'm a slut but the school didn't except me because of he yeshiva my hub went ro
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zaq
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Tue, Dec 31 2013, 7:20 pm
| bamamama wrote: | | What exactly does it mean to "dress like a bum" anyway? Leaving aside the derogatory term "bum" meaning homeless person... |
Nah. That's old slang.
According to the imamother dictionary, "bum" has several meanings:
1. A person lacking in class or culture
2. A person whose sense of fashion is less finely developed than one's own
3. A person who owns not one single "designer" garment or accessory
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33055
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Tue, Dec 31 2013, 7:21 pm
| Barbara wrote: | Straightforward question.
Why do you care what the parents of other kids in the schools your children attend wear?
I'm sitting her, sick to my stomach at the nasty, derogatory terms that women here use to describe other women. "Don't send your kids to that school. The mothers dress like sluts." "I'm not considering another school, the parents are bums."
Do you honestly think that there are women turning tricks at night, and sending their little Moishele off to yeshiva the next morning?
Don't you think that the SCHOOL -- you know, the quality of the teachers, the curriculum, the physical plant -- is more important than whether some woman with kids at the school, whom your kids will probably never see, covers her knees? Not to mention more influential.
And how do you feel knowing that if your kids weren't accepted at a school, it may be because there's some woman here thinking that you dress like a slut and a bum? |
A straight forward answer: often the status of the family and the child is dependent on the school the family sends to. This status is important for shiduchim. It important when getting to know someone if the kashrus of the kitchen for instance is acceptable. Being the schools vet families the fact that a certain school accepted a certain families means this is family might be one wants to associate with.
Yes Barbara, the midos of the families as evidenced by outward manifestations is often more important than the physical plant, the quality of the teachers and the curriculum.
I send my children to two schools. One school has a better curriculum, a lovely building and is said to have better teachers as they hire only experienced teachers away from other schools. Many of the moms can be dressed in a manner designed to attract attention. The other school I send to has a building falling down, underpaid teachers and a weaker English curriculum. The moms are universally dressed modestly. Guess which one I am admired for sending my children to?
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PinkFridge
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Tue, Dec 31 2013, 7:30 pm
Who said I do?
OP, I do get the bikini and bandana oxymoron.
And for the sake of the children, or the members from Yurp, or at least the UK, the three letter "b" word has other connotations. Just saying.
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amother
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Tue, Dec 31 2013, 7:41 pm
| amother wrote: | | I am that amother that wrote up the post ur talking about and those schools that I said are bummy I mean that my friends 8 yr old came home dropping f bombs and knowing songs that had inappropriate words and trying so hard to show the world that they're "cool" bikinis on the beach type. And btw yes I was in Miami an saw a family from that school there but mom was wearing a bandana go figure..... I don't want my kids to get confused about what is and isn't ok |
How did you know this mother?
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PinkFridge
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Tue, Dec 31 2013, 7:45 pm
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I just want to add though that if the school has some basic tznius guidelines, it is nice if the parent body covers their bodies accordingly. But I've been around the block enough times not to make judgments.
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bamamama
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Tue, Dec 31 2013, 7:55 pm
| zaq wrote: | Nah. That's old slang.
According to the imamother dictionary, "bum" has several meanings:
1. A person lacking in class or culture
2. A person whose sense of fashion is less finely developed than one's own
3. A person who owns not one single "designer" garment or accessory |
Check. Check.Check.
OMG. I'M A BUM!!!!!!!!!!!
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Frumdoc
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Tue, Dec 31 2013, 8:10 pm
| zaq wrote: | Nah. That's old slang.
According to the imamother dictionary, "bum" has several meanings:
1. A person lacking in class or culture
2. A person whose sense of fashion is less finely developed than one's own
3. A person who owns not one single "designer" garment or accessory |
I fulfill both 2 & 3, and probably 1 as well, so watch out, don't let your kids anywhere near me or mine 
And I wear a bandana, although not a bikini (euw, don't go there), so I must be a sl*t too 
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seer
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Tue, Dec 31 2013, 8:19 pm
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I think what people are trying to say when they say "bum" which is not a word I would use is that when the person's standards are lower than the majority of the institution to which they send their child so it would be a relative definition obviously. Hence, all the indignation when someone tries to place an exact definition. For example, if you send your child to YOB in brooklyn in which the accepted mode of dress is yeshiveshe showing up on the beach in a bikini and bandana would definitely make you a bum. Not so in a more modern school where it is acceptable to wear bikinis. when an entire school's standards are lower than your own it would be labeled "bummy" by some people when the standards are higher than your own it would be labeled "frummer or more yeshivishe".....
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