Fast and easy way to toilet train

Motek

Wed, May 25 2005, 2:05 pm

roza wrote:

we provide such opportunity at 2 and it worked with all the children. you should know that in Russia they used to start putting a child on the potty as soon as they learn to sit which at 6 mon. (that's how I was trained) and by 1 year the child is trained. yes, right there were no dipers then. this whole start train-when-the - child- is ready business is a diper business shtik.

could you please give more details about how this is done (responding to comments in previous posts?)

Quote:

No one (without physical disabilities) goes to the chuppah in diapers.

but 7 year olds, even 12 year olds, go to sleepaway camp with pull-ups

yehudis

Wed, May 25 2005, 2:10 pm

freilich wrote:

Maybe
A) they believed in use of force in Russia

Definitely! In Russia, nobody cared about the child's feelings, ever. Don't start me on that.

Anyway, I don't see a point in toilet training a baby -- it's so much easier to change diapers than have to run around looking for a bathroom everywhere you go.

So here's my experience: with my first, we tried putting her on the potty before she turned 2. Big mistake -- one day she made in it and was absolutely terrified. She refused to sit on the thing for over a year. At three, we decided she was ready, because she could tell us when she need to go (in the diaper) and ask us to change the diaper right away. The big challenge was getting her to sit on the toilet (we decided to skip the potty to make things easier). It took lots of encouragement, bribes, etc. until she was finally comfortable not only sitting on it, but letting go and making in it.

With my second who is now 23 months, we didn't say a word to her about toilet training. But she always sees her older sister going on the toilet. So one day, a couple of weeks ago, she just took off her diaper and refused to put it back on. I thought, OK, let's see what happens. For a day or so she went on the floor, then she figured it out and is now going on the toilet (most of the time). That is, if she's not wearing anything. I do put a diaper on her when we go out, or at night, and then she goes in the diaper. So that's been working great so far. I just let her do it at her own pace. The only drawback of this method is that you have to be willing to clean up for the first couple of days Smile

chavamom

Wed, May 25 2005, 4:24 pm

Motek wrote:

but 7 year olds, even 12 year olds, go to sleepaway camp with pull-ups

One thing had nothing to do with the other. Bedwetting is not a choice and most often has a physiological basis. All the incentives in the world will rarely lead to a dry bed. The most common causes are small bladder or deep sleep and failure to awaken to a full bladder.

You are comparing apples and oranges.

roza

Wed, May 25 2005, 4:58 pm

Quote:

could you please give more details about how this is done (responding to comments in previous posts?)

if u are asking how we trained at 2, then it was stated above- go without anything completly, make sure the potty is near by and the child knows where to find it. We had sit on the potty- and- "read"- books periods. Positive reinforcment and so on.

About a potty- it does not have to be someting big and fancy but light and simple like the one from Baby Bjorn.

BTW in the same site that someone here recommended, there is an article on INFANT potty training and how it's done. (forcing and hitting are not the only ways to potty train the infant): http://www.kellymom.com/parent......html

lucy

Sat, May 28 2005, 8:57 pm

Proudmom: I'm a big believer if the're ready it will be done in a week. Don't push it. I remeber parents would be pushing their kids ( when I was working in garderie) and they were totally not ready it was pointless. If he's not ready take a break & you have the whole summer to work with him. Boy usually take longer than girls. Pull Ups = diapers! The only time I ever used them was when I went to NY trips & I was afraid that I'de be in the car with an accident, so their easier when you make a bathroom stop then taking off the diaper!

roza

Sun, May 29 2005, 4:34 pm

I don't train so early as infant, but at 2, defenitly did not wait for kids to 'be ready'
with my kids- it worked fine with girls and boys. yes they did make at night. we tried to wake them up in the middle of the night and take them to the bathroom, which helped so after awhile they learned. my 3 year still makes at night sometimes - not a big deal - it will pass.

I brought a link about infant potty training to demonstrate that it's not a russian training only.

curlyhead

Mon, May 30 2005, 4:01 am

I disscussed this topic with my russian babysitter. She said that they did not have normal diapers so that is why they toilet trained young. It was more that they knew the child's schedule and would make the child sit on the potty for long periods of time. it is not really that the child was so aware of its own body.

IndyMom

Mon, May 30 2005, 11:10 am

I filled out the under one week poll last week - buti was wrong. My oldest has been trained since we got back after pesach, but suddenly yesterday he refused to go to the toilet. We were bribing him, threatening him, begging him, yelling at him, anything we could think of to make him go, but he wouldn't. It became a battle. So, today we put him in diapers and decided to not make an issue. I think he will come around on his own, otehrwise I don't know what to do. Iwonder if it's due to the impending birth of a new sibling since he keeps talking about being a "baby". Any ideas? He got all the great toys already since he was potty trained for a month. He got his legos, his trains, his bicycle. He even stayed trained two weeks beyond that, and now back to diapers. I hope he chooses to go back to the toilet on his own, ijust can't fight with him about it. Oh, and when I try to talk with him about hte baby to see if he has issues with it, he doesn't say anything so lately I have just tried to avoid baby talk around him. Anyone have any ideas? He is 3 by the way.

IndyMom

Mon, May 30 2005, 12:27 pm

it started on shabbos. My husband decided to take him to shul for mincha and maariv. He didn't want to go to the bathroom before he left and my husband was in a rush so he told him that he would have to go as soon as they got to shul. Well, my husband got to the tallis box and the boy started making (without saying he had to go ahead of time) and then he looked up and he said "uh oh, I;m making pee pee!" so my husband carried him tot he bathroom and had to change his pants and underwear adn clean up the trail from the tallis box to the bathroom, and then he came home becuase he couldnt handle the boy there anymore.

So Sunday we kept reminding him to go, but he refused. We didn't want him to leave the house without going to the bathroom first, so we ended up not leaving the house. We didn't want to even put underwear on him in the morning until he went, but he wouldn't go. Also, before his bath I told him to go, he refused. Actually, he is normally a pretty good kid - but lately he is refusing everything, including the bath. I tried reverse psychology on him "you don't have to make in the toilet, it's easier for me if you go in a diaper" - didn't work either. NOTHING IS WORKING! grrrrr

IndyMom

Mon, May 30 2005, 12:47 pm

I sit down in front of him and look at him eye to eye and gently say

"why don't you want to go on the toilet anymore?"
"because I don't"
"but why?"
"becuase"
"did something make you not want to go on the toilet?"
"huh?"
"is there somethign going on that makes you not want to go on the toilet?"
"huh?"
"Would you rather go in a diaper?"
"no"
"what do you want to do"
"I don't want to go to the bathroom"

gets pretty circular after a while. Just by being in tune, I am pretty sure it has to do with the new baby coming. I have been REALLY busy preparing since I know I won't get much done afterwards. I keep going to the store and leaving him with the babysitter. I did take him with me a few times, but I can't get as much done so I have to leave him sometimes too. I know that that is the reason, I just wish there was something I could do about it. And ifhe is feeling neglected now, how much more so when he does have a new baby sibling I"YH?

yehudis

Mon, May 30 2005, 3:37 pm

Sounds hard. I heard that all children regress when a new baby is about to be born, and a few months afterwards, but the stories I heard from my friends were usually about the oldest and the second child. I definitely heard stories about potty trained children refusing to use the bathroom after a sibling was born. At least one I can think of.

Not that I have any idea what to do about it. Maybe if you just try to relax in your preparations and try to spend some more time with him, it would help.

motheroftwo

Mon, May 30 2005, 6:14 pm

To me "toilet trained" means, the child knows when she has to make and will go on her own. She is able to pull off her underpants get on the toilet herself, wipe herself, and flush.
Kids who are trained before 2 will generally not be able to do all that. Which basically means the mother has to do it for them. They probably keep asking every few minutes if the child needs to make or just put them on the toilet every couple of hours (like the russian method). They need to help them get undressed and put them on the toilet.
To me that's not toilet trained. You're busier that way than if the kid was wearing diapers. It's much easier to change a diaper than to constantly have to worry if the child has to make. Especially outside the house.
I started when my daughter was a few months shy of 3. I did it in 3 days and she was able to perform all the tasks above on her own. After 3 days she was back in school and rarely had an accident.

What worked for me was spending 1 day all day with her near the potty, giving her a lot to drink and rewarding her everytime she made. I would ask her every few minutes whether she had to make and if she did she would sit on the potty and I would read her books until she made. When she made I made a huge deal out of it, gave her a sticker and chocolate or candy. The second day I asked her less and she was pretty good about it already. When she did wet her pants I made her take them off put them in the hamper and get a fresh pair. No spanking or scolding! Just no reward.
Then we graduated to the toilet with a children's seat. After the 3rd day she was trained. I think the most important thing is to stay home with them for 3 days and really focus on the training. I had my husband take care of the baby so I was really able to focus on her without distractions.

raizy

Mon, May 30 2005, 7:31 pm

motheroftwo sounds good to me. but it does not happen in 3 days. also what do u do with the other 3 kids while you trained your darling.

I right away when they are ready and they tell me that they want underwear I put them on underpants. it takes about 3 days for them to get the concepts that they should go to the bathroom . after a couple of accidents. they get the message. it like something clickes in their little brains and then they jsut go.

for me a toilet trained kid is a kid who can go on their own to the toilet and then flush and pull up afterwards. the small they do themselves but the bigs I wipe them.

at what age can a child wipe themselves?