Why Do They Enjoy Making Us Mad?

Post new topic   Reply to topic    Forum -> Parenting our children

View latest: 24h 48h 72h



Post Sun, May 27 2007, 2:53 pm
Okay, so I know a parent should not get mad in the first place. But I was just wondering about some child psychology.
If children hate getting yelled at, being put in time out etc... why do they intentionally drive their parents over the edge.
And I know my son is doing it intentionally because he smiles before he "crosses the line." to see what I will do. And he does it..making sure I notice.
Usually I control my temper, and this doesn't happen, but on days like today when I had a complete meltdown, he does whatever he did (I.e. the thing he got punished for) again to press my buttons.
Why do kids like to do this? Especially since they got punished the first time? Any amateur (or even professional) psychologists here with this kid experience?
It would help me understand him better.
Back to top



Post Sun, May 27 2007, 3:30 pm
Your talking like you were never a kid yourself.
Back to top



Post Sun, May 27 2007, 3:40 pm
I believe they want to see if you the parent are really in control ... so they test over and over and over ... in hope that they one day will get control ... or in hope you can continue to safeguard them with your control ... whoever said it was easy ... Twisted Evil Shooting Arrow
Back to top



Post Sun, May 27 2007, 4:33 pm
If you aren't usually getting angry, maybe he is testing the waters to see if you are back to "normal"
Like one Shabbos, I had a horrible migrane and was in a rotten mood. I try to avoid getting upset with my kids over issues concerning Yiddishkeit. but I was weak and yelled at my son for intentionally playing with something muktze.
Throughout the day, he went back to touch the object. It was only when I calmly said, "honey, that's muktze, we don't play with that on Shabbos" and I was back to my calmer self that he stopped.

It's like they are testing the water and maybe Hashem gives them this capacity to give us practice working on our middos until we get it right Wink My guess is your son will stop doing what he is doing when you are less angry. It might not be immediate, but you should see some improvement...just my guess.
Back to top



Post Sun, May 27 2007, 5:14 pm
they want to test ure love and see if ull love them no matter what. I think deep down thats what thye are thinking.Also, its importnat to give kids alot of positive attention, cuz if they get lots of negatie attention, at least they are getting ure attention so theyll just do the thing u dont like over and over.
Back to top



Post Mon, May 28 2007, 1:11 am
Like happymom said- lots of kids misbehave because that's the only way they know to get attention. By giving them attention in other ways, they don't always need to act out to get attention.
Back to top
Recent Topics

Page 1 of 1 View latest: 24h 48h 72h

Post new topic   Reply to topic    Forum -> Parenting our children

Related Topics Replies Last Post
Making meals for Kimpeturin 17 Yesterday at 10:16 am View last post
Making a Simcha....Relative refuses to get haircut!
by amother
50 Tue, Jun 15 2021, 12:26 pm View last post
by zaq
Making protein bars
by amother
2 Mon, Jun 07 2021, 7:06 pm View last post
Making a sheitel cap smaller- QUEENS
by amother
4 Thu, Jun 03 2021, 8:25 pm View last post
Making a sheitl lighter?
by Sunsong
8 Wed, Jun 02 2021, 5:24 pm View last post