Any ideas how to get him toilet trained?

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Post  Sun, Jul 01 2007, 1:25 pm
My son is almost 2 - I know it's early but the question remains. He is very stubborn, wants things his way, puts up big fights.. he is a real die-hard. He knows when he makes (especially #2). He for months has gone off to his bed room, makes, and comes back when he is done. Lately he comes back and says "diaper change". We read potty books, he has sat on the potty, he discusses that pishy etc belongs on the potty, I showed him underwear he will get etc. He tells me he should make on the potty and not in his diaper. For a few days in a row he pished in the bath and told me pishy goes in the bath. I fixed that... he knows it goes in the potty.

He will sit on the potty most of the time with no prob but he never makes. Then he gets off and on like 3 times in 10 min. He'll tell me the "pishy is coming" but does nothing. Then later he'll go running off to his room to make. Sometimes I cant catch him bc of the other kids. If I do, he will throw a fit and wont sit on the potty. He said he wants to go to his bed to make. For months he doesnt like having anyone around when he makes. If we come near his room when he makes he motions for us not to come.

Any ideas what to do from here?
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chocolate moose


Post  Sun, Jul 01 2007, 2:47 pm
He has to want it. What about an incentive?
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Post  Sun, Jul 01 2007, 2:51 pm
This kid will never want it. I have had to force any changes up till now. I told him he will get a prize after he goes, and we'll call sabba and savta etc. If I tell him what he will get, knowing him he'll start tantruming for it on the spot so I am not doing that.
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Post  Sun, Jul 01 2007, 3:05 pm
I also just tried training my 23 mth old. after 2 days I realized he understands but isn't ready. apparently there is a big difference. my son could sit on the toilet for over an hour straight, with nothing doing, and then 3 minutes after getting off the toilet, pish on the floor. I think unless there is a compelling reason to try now, you might as well save yourself the admas nefesh and just wait for a later time.
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Post  Sun, Jul 01 2007, 3:31 pm
Stop all attempts to train him for the next few weeks. Then when he is a bit more ready, pick a couple of days when you will stay home and do nothing for those days except for feed and take him to the toilet and remind him of all the big people he knows that use the "sheirutim". Find some friends or relatives with some already trained little kids who will not mind letting him in when they go. Personally, I have no problem bringing a 2yr old into the bathroom when the parent has to go. Also do not expect a child to tell you he has to go if he is wearing a diaper. The diaper man didn't bring any and you don't have any! He has to wear his big boy pants.
Of course any success means that you sing "siman tov v mazel tov", call sabba and safta, and give him a big kiss.
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chocolate moose


Post  Sun, Jul 01 2007, 3:36 pm
Neither of my kids were at all interested in training. They were well over three before they were trained and off to school on the bus they went!

It was a bunch of things together that did it:

    a big toy when they did go - does your son want tzitsis like tatty's?
    a comfortable potty seat (DS wanted the kind that goes over the toilet, not a baby one on the floor)
    and last but not least, the morahs in playgroup

I have also heard it said to make the diapering process uncomfortable/boring for the child....you could also try using plain diapers if you can get them, not the decorated ones.
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Post  Sun, Jul 01 2007, 4:28 pm
could be he is not ready yet - boys do tend to be a bit later than girls ... um I would wait a bit longer too - although the summer is the ideal time to take advantage of training because diapers are hot and leaving him run around in undies is fine ... give him the undies and just forget the diapers when you are ready - when they get wet he will want to pee in the toilet ...
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Post  Sun, Jul 01 2007, 6:09 pm
I just trained my 3rd kid - she's 27 mos. Summer is THE BEST time to do this b/c you don't worry about the child being really cold or uncomfortable if he has an accident. he sounds potty ready. Can you put a little potty in his bedroom and let him try to make that way?

Take away all diapers - except bedtime. Put him in underwear. (Save pull ups for when you go out and won't be near a bathroom - like a park.) Be totally matter of fact about him making in the potty like all the big people do. We gave choc chips and danced and sang for every success. I DID NOT make a big deal about any accidents. Do this consistently for a week and do not back down - just be positive the whole time. I'll bet this will work.

Just keep a ton of shmattas ready to clean up. Buy yourself rubber gloves and 409 spray and make cleaning up accidents as painless as possible.

Good luck! Very Happy
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Post  Sun, Jul 01 2007, 6:12 pm

We gave choc chips and danced and sang for every success.

That's so sweet! Yes, prizes are important.

Just remember if this fails (it did in my case because my 3 year old regressed when the baby was born), you can always take all of his clothes off for a few days as a last resort. It definitely works. It's okay in terms of tznius, at least according to my rabbi...
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