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The insanity of cooking suppers for someone who had a baby
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southernbubby




 
 
 


Post  Fri, Mar 15 2019, 10:15 am
ectomorph wrote:
If you don't like it you don't need to participate but you don't need a make up things that don't happen.

I've never seen such a bunch of Debbie downers trying to stop people from doing something that really helps postpartum women prevent postpartum depression and brings communities together


I believe that l have read it on other threads here but if you say that it doesn't happen, you may (or may not) be right.
It is a beautiful mitzvah but if everyone enjoyed doing it we obviously wouldn't have a 27 page thread that was started in 2015. I am sure that it's not a big deal for most people because they either want to do it or have no problem saying "no".
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Iymnok




 
 
 


Post  Fri, Mar 15 2019, 10:18 am
Wow, I started at the beginning of this thread before I realized it was old, then skipped to the present. Nothing has changed! This is very fascinating that the same thing can be rehashed or repeated for 27 pages!

I applaud you for staying on topic!
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southernbubby




 
 
 


Post  Fri, Mar 15 2019, 10:22 am
ra_mom wrote:
That doesn't sound accurate. Nobody who has stricter kashrus requirements than the community would ask for a meal train.


Probably not. It could be that neighbors who are not part of the train simply bring or send things, much like what happens on Purim where people toss anything homemade because it is a possible re-gift from someone who they don't know.
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southernbubby




 
 
 


Post  Fri, Mar 15 2019, 11:31 am
If you read the first few pages of the thread, there is mention of frozen food being tossed and on page 5, there is a post about tzedukah recipients who refuse frozen food and therefore get less.

I do know some finicky types IRL who don't want food from people who have frequent rodent issues.

I personally have had the unpleasant experience of dealing with chessed coordinators (not regarding PP meals) who did NOT respect me when I had to turn down a request so even though I had done chessed with those groups numerous times, if I wasn't "allowed" to refuse, I had to stop volunteering for them. Luckily I have found organizations that respect the volunteers so it's a pleasure to volunteer for them.
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amother




Yellow


Post  Fri, Mar 15 2019, 11:35 am
southernbubby wrote:
If you read the first few pages of the thread, there is mention of frozen food being tossed and on page 5, there is a post about tzedukah recipients who refuse frozen food and therefore get less.

I do know some finicky types IRL who don't want food from people who have frequent rodent issues.

I personally have had the unpleasant experience of dealing with chessed coordinators (not regarding PP meals) who did NOT respect me when I had to turn down a request so even though I had done chessed with those groups numerous times, if I wasn't "allowed" to refuse, I had to stop volunteering for them. Luckily I have found organizations that respect the volunteers so it's a pleasure to volunteer for them.


I volunteer to cook for Hilf. The nicest people run it. They never pressure me, thank me ten times for doing it, and give me positive feedback from the recipients. It’s a pleasure dealing with them. Same goes for the kimpeturin lunch coordinators in BP.
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pause




 
 
 


Post  Fri, Mar 15 2019, 11:38 am
Iymnok wrote:
Wow, I started at the beginning of this thread before I realized it was old, then skipped to the present. Nothing has changed! This is very fascinating that the same thing can be rehashed or repeated for 27 pages!

I applaud you for staying on topic!

On page 17 or something, I posted the same thing as you did here! No, nothing's changed...!
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amother




Burgundy


Post  Fri, Mar 15 2019, 3:06 pm
I read MOST of the posts but still have not figured out what everyone is getting at.
For those RECEIVING the meals, are you more appreciative if someone sends you a ten course meal, complete with bread, drinks, a variety of side dishes, soup, dessert and a main course, than you are if someone sends you only the main course, and maybe dessert and a salad????
And if you are the one SENDING the meal, would you eagerly send only the main course with maybe a salad and dessert than not to send anything at all because you cannot compete with the Joneses???
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ectomorph




 
 
 


Post  Fri, Mar 15 2019, 5:10 pm
amother wrote:
I read MOST of the posts but still have not figured out what everyone is getting at.
For those RECEIVING the meals, are you more appreciative if someone sends you a ten course meal, complete with bread, drinks, a variety of side dishes, soup, dessert and a main course, than you are if someone sends you only the main course, and maybe dessert and a salad????
And if you are the one SENDING the meal, would you eagerly send only the main course with maybe a salad and dessert than not to send anything at all because you cannot compete with the Joneses???

I have never recieved or given a 10 course meal. Starch protein veg. Sometimes ppl do dessert too.
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amother




Maroon


Post  Fri, Mar 15 2019, 5:10 pm
amother wrote:
I read MOST of the posts but still have not figured out what everyone is getting at.
For those RECEIVING the meals, are you more appreciative if someone sends you a ten course meal, complete with bread, drinks, a variety of side dishes, soup, dessert and a main course, than you are if someone sends you only the main course, and maybe dessert and a salad????
And if you are the one SENDING the meal, would you eagerly send only the main course with maybe a salad and dessert than not to send anything at all because you cannot compete with the Joneses???


Honestly, the advantage of those massive meals is it leaves food for lunch the next day too. It's 2 meals, not just one. But I by no means expect that from anyone, they signed up for a meal, not a day.

When I was running the house where my mom was sitting Shiva, I asked for meals to be sent only every other night because I knew there would be too much food otherwise.
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amother




Pearl


Post  Mon, Mar 18 2019, 4:38 pm
In my building we created a group for those that want to make Shabbos meals for others pp, and it will be reciprocated when they have a baby. Instead of supper, we make the first 2 weeks Shabbos meals. A menu is posted of what the family eats and then you can choose one item from the menu.
Being that there are more women than items needed you don’t have to do it both weeks but many do.
This way there’s no pressure and only those who want to join do.
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