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Forum -> Parenting our children -> School age children
Awful playdate



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amother
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Post Fri, Apr 07 2017, 11:00 am
I arranged a playdate for my oldest yesterday as everyone was off from school. The child goes to a different school, but my son is friendly with him from shul. The child was a holy terror. He was causing physical damage to things around the house, threw a tantrum when he didn't like what I served for lunch, and, the straw that broke the camel's back and made me call his mother to come get him earlier than planned was that he hit one of my younger kids. I know this boy has special needs; my oldest son does too, that's probably why they get along so well. But my son is not at all violent or destructive, he's challenging in other ways. I feel very bad for the mother, she obviously has her hands full and she was very embarrassed that her son was too much of a handful for me, but yeah, I don't ever want to have him over again. But I want to be nice about it. I know what it's like to be excluded because we have a special needs kid, I don't want to do that to another family. And I don't want to deprive my son of one of his few friends, he really doesn't make friends easily at all.
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esuss




 
 
    
 

Post Fri, Apr 07 2017, 11:26 am
I think you should have the kid for a shorter play date only when his mother can come as well. He may have been stressed out of being somewhere new. have his mother stay with him for a few shorter play dates until he gets used to your house. He may also do better if they play outdoors.
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seeker




 
 
    
 

Post Fri, Apr 07 2017, 12:25 pm
Yes maybe have another playdate...after a while, with both kids' parents in attendance. Consider doing it at the other kid's home.
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challahchallah




 
 
    
 

Post Fri, Apr 07 2017, 2:36 pm
Could both families meet at a park to play? There's more room and you don't have to worry about him causing damage.
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behappy2




 
 
    
 

Post Sat, Apr 08 2017, 10:34 pm
Can you make rules. I had a similar issue and I told my son and his friend that if they don't follow rules he needs to go home. It worked bec the kid is hyperactive and he was able to control himself. I don't know if this would work in your situation.
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