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flowerpower









  


Post  Thu, Feb 08 2018, 9:05 am
When you go to a simcha and there's a table of souvenirs to take home like personalized chocolate with the simcha boys face on it, do you take home just one or one per kid?



I am asking because I made a simcha recently and I heard from a good few kids that their mom brought home one per kid and I am livid! I ordered the same amount as ladies I was expecting. So that means that like half didn't get to take any at all. Wasn't it supposed to be common sense?
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Blessing1









  


Post  Thu, Feb 08 2018, 9:07 am
One per guest! That's it! Most people know these souvenirs are expensive & not meant to treat the family.
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Mayflower









  


Post  Thu, Feb 08 2018, 9:08 am
I would think every guest can take home one. So if you invited kids, those kids get to take one. If you invited only the mother, she can take just one. Seems like common sense to me as well, but from recent threads here I learned a lot of people seem to take home all sorts of stuff from simchas.
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Bnei Berak 10









  


Post  Thu, Feb 08 2018, 9:26 am
OP, its should be one per invited guest. Not one per each child you have at home.

However, as we have all seen from the Sweet Table thread as well as the Napkin Etiquette thread there are many things which should be common sense and very different in reality.

I admire you people who put in so much thought, effort, logistics, hard work not to mention the money to make it a special and happy simcha and then a part of attending guests who are supposed to be family, relative and friends kind behave the way they behave. I would have given up loooooong time ago.
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MiracleMama









  


Post  Thu, Feb 08 2018, 9:30 am
One per guest. But unfortunately it's so expected that people take advantage that I think it's better to place one at each seat than to have a table to pick up on the way out.
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seeker









  


Post  Thu, Feb 08 2018, 9:33 am
One per guest. It's different than a sweet table, though. (I'm not disagreeing that it's rude to bring home the sweet table. I just think a general buffet of cookies or something is different than custom-ordered per-piece items.)

You could ask, though. Most things are ordered in incremental quantities and there's likely to be enough extra for the baal simcha to offer a few to someone special. I've received things like personalized chocolates from simchas of close relatives that I wasn't able to attend due to location or other hardships. Like a "thinking of you" gesture.
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seeker









  


Post  Thu, Feb 08 2018, 9:38 am
MiracleMama wrote:
One per guest. But unfortunately it's so expected that people take advantage that I think it's better to place one at each seat than to have a table to pick up on the way out.

Placing one at each seat is a great idea!
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MiracleMama









  


Post  Thu, Feb 08 2018, 9:39 am
Mayflower wrote:
I would think every guest can take home one. So if you invited kids, those kids get to take one. If you invited only the mother, she can take just one. Seems like common sense to me as well, but from recent threads here I learned a lot of people seem to take home all sorts of stuff from simchas.


True. I remember people walking off with the centerpieces from my bas mitzvah. People tried again at my wedding and my mother had to stop them since the non-flower portion (vases and candelabras) belonged to the florist or party planner. I rented special bonzai trees as centerpieces for my son's upsherin and felt ridiculous having to ask people to please not take the trees at the end of the party but I had to do it or I'd have to pay out hundreds of dollars for them. People walked off with full bottles of booze and sparkling water as well. Oh, and bentchers.... it's expected that people will take one as a memento but I constantly see people collecting 10+ -- I guess they decided their supply at home needs updating. Rolling Eyes
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cbg









  


Post  Thu, Feb 08 2018, 9:48 am
seeker wrote:
Placing one at each seat is a great idea!


I’ve seen a person personally give them out as the person leaves
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Bnei Berak 10









  


Post  Thu, Feb 08 2018, 9:50 am
Mayflower wrote:
I would think every guest can take home one. So if you invited kids, those kids get to take one. If you invited only the mother, she can take just one. Seems like common sense to me as well, but from recent threads here I learned a lot of people seem to take home all sorts of stuff from simchas.


And even then I'm sure there are mothers who get invited and choose to bring at least one or more of their offspring and expect a treat for each attendee, regardless if invited or not. One will need a uniformed guard at the door with a guest list to give out one treat per invited guest and only against signature and ID.
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Blessing1









  


Post  Thu, Feb 08 2018, 9:52 am
If you place one at each place setting, I shall hope no one will go collecting for their kids.
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flowerpower









  


Post  Thu, Feb 08 2018, 10:08 am
I was thinking of putting one by everyones place. It just looked nicer in the hallway where you walk in. I really thought it common sense. Next time I will definitely put at everyones place. I ordered miniatures for the sweet table and was okay with people bringing home sweets for their kids.

One person wanted to take home a vase with flowers. I told her the vases have to be returned but she can take home flowers. Some people overheard and took some home as well. I was totally fine with it.
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FranticFrummie









  


Post  Thu, Feb 08 2018, 10:14 am
Blessing1 wrote:
If you place one at each place setting, I shall hope no one will go collecting for their kids.


"Are you going to eat that? I want one to take home for Dovi."

*stuffs cookies in the cloth napkin, and takes the napkin home too.*

Rolling Eyes I swear, some people must have been raised by wolves!
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Blessing1









  


Post  Thu, Feb 08 2018, 10:35 am
Rolling Laughter Rolling Laughter Thumbs Up
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amother




Pumpkin


Post  Thu, Feb 08 2018, 12:19 pm
MiracleMama wrote:
True. I remember people walking off with the centerpieces from my bas mitzvah. People tried again at my wedding and my mother had to stop them since the non-flower portion (vases and candelabras) belonged to the florist or party planner. I rented special bonzai trees as centerpieces for my son's upsherin and felt ridiculous having to ask people to please not take the trees at the end of the party but I had to do it or I'd have to pay out hundreds of dollars for them. People walked off with full bottles of booze and sparkling water as well. Oh, and bentchers.... it's expected that people will take one as a memento but I constantly see people collecting 10+ -- I guess they decided their supply at home needs updating. Rolling Eyes


What is wrong with people? Ladies, don't even ask if you can take home things from the simcha; it puts the baal simcha in an uncomfortable position if they want it. Be considerate
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amother




Scarlet


Post  Thu, Feb 08 2018, 9:24 pm
I very don't always take home the souvenir and I gladly give it to someone that wants to take home an extra.
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shanie5









  


Post  Mon, Feb 12 2018, 10:03 pm
With benchers, I know people that will collect them at the end of a simcha because the waiters will toss them in the garbage. These people are preventing shamos from being put in the garbage.
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amother




Gold


Post  Mon, Feb 12 2018, 10:16 pm
Ladies I think it's time we bring things down a notch. We're so hooked on these expensive beautiful miniatures etc we loose sight of whats real and important in life. I wish I could just have tons of cookies and rugalach in baskets w a simple menu and pack up for anyone I know that would enjoy...so much warmth and love instead of this unnecessary disgust and anger.
Oh well...can't cry over spilt milk I guess... It's just those beautiful memories as a kid going to a simcha where the hostess looked at ease and encouraged the mommys to bring home for the kiddies that didn't come...miss those peaceful days
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amother




Oak


Post  Mon, Feb 12 2018, 10:23 pm
I remember after my Tenoyim, before I went into the side room to talk with my Chuson, I remarked to my mother that I'm happy we have lots of extra goodies that we can freeze for my Sheva Brochos less than 3 months later. My mother and I have spent the better part of the winter afternoons baking up a storm, and our sweet tables were really overflowing with cakes and miniatures. Knowing that I have a short engagement period I was glad to have one less worry.. When I came out of the room some time later, I was shocked to see bare tables!! Those last few guests took home so much food, and my parents were left with empty boxes.
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amother




Lavender


Post  Tue, Feb 13 2018, 1:13 am
I always give away my souvenir. Don’t need more junk at home sorry!
I give it to ladies who want to take Home for their children.

If I think it would be interesting for my kids, I try to see if anyone is uninterested in theirs.
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