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Forum
-> The Social Scene
-> Chit Chat
mommy9
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 Tue, Feb 27 2018, 12:30 am
How many women with PMS does it take to change a lightbulb?
432
Why so many?
It just does! Okay?
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Jewishfoodie
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Tue, Feb 27 2018, 9:13 am
Trigger Warning! One offensive word and one mention of Dr. Mengele, Yemach sh'mo, v'zichro.
Lekavod Purim..
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Jewishfoodie
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Tue, Feb 27 2018, 10:19 am
The first time I got a universal remote control I thought to myselfThe first time I got a universal remote control I thought to myself,
"This changes everything"
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Jewishfoodie
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Tue, Feb 27 2018, 10:21 am
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I recently decided to sell my vacuum cleaner as all it was doing was gathering dust.
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Optimystic
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Tue, Feb 27 2018, 1:32 pm
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I am right 97% of the time. Who cares about the other 4%?
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13
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Jewishfoodie
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Tue, Feb 27 2018, 1:40 pm
Don't you hate it when someone answers their own questions? I do.
As I watched the dog chasing his tail I thought "Dogs are easily amused", then I realized I was watching the dog chasing his tail.
PMS jokes are not funny or appropriate. Period!
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Jewishfoodie
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Tue, Feb 27 2018, 1:41 pm
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Gambling addiction hotlines would do so much better if every fifth caller was a winner...
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7
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Jewishfoodie
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Tue, Feb 27 2018, 1:42 pm
Just because nobody complains doesn't mean all parachutes are perfect...
To the man on crutches, dressed in camouflage, who stole my wallet - you can hide, but you can't run.
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Optimystic
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Tue, Feb 27 2018, 2:16 pm
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56% of statistics are just made up.
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Jewishfoodie
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Tue, Feb 27 2018, 2:19 pm
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My friend keeps trying to convince me that she's a compulsive liar but I don't believe her.. .
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Jewishfoodie
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Tue, Feb 27 2018, 2:20 pm
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It’s always hard to explain puns to kleptomaniacs because they’re always taking things literally.
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Jewishfoodie
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Tue, Feb 27 2018, 2:22 pm
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I had a neck-braced fitted years ago, and I never looked back since..
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Jewishfoodie
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Tue, Feb 27 2018, 2:22 pm
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My wife just found out I replaced our bed with a trampoline; she literally hit the roof.
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enneamom
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Tue, Feb 27 2018, 2:25 pm
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I was gonna do a one-liner about apathy, but then I figured, why bother?
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Jewishfoodie
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Tue, Feb 27 2018, 3:32 pm
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My boss told me I intimidate other coworkers, so I just stared at him, until he apologized...
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Jewishfoodie
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Tue, Feb 27 2018, 3:34 pm
Prisoner: "I’m sorry I tried to escape..."
Guard: "I’m not mad, just… disappointed.. '
Remember, kids, never let your guard down.
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Jewishfoodie
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Tue, Feb 27 2018, 3:36 pm
Police have arrested the world tongue-twister champion.
I imagine he’ll be given a tough sentence...
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Jewishfoodie
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Tue, Feb 27 2018, 6:44 pm
Thanks for explaining the word "many" to me.
It means a lot.
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Jewishfoodie
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Tue, Feb 27 2018, 6:45 pm
The mother who injected her 8 year-old child with Botox for the beauty pageant has lost custody.
The daughter didn't look surprised.
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Jewishfoodie
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Tue, Feb 27 2018, 7:04 pm
I tried to sue the airline for misplacing my luggage.
I lost my case
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