Home
Log in / Sign Up
    Private Messages   Advanced Search   Rules   New User Guide   FAQ   Advertise   Contact Us  
Forum -> Interesting Discussions
Hashem Made me be mechallel shabbos HATE MYSELF needCHIZIK
Previous  1  2  3



Post new topic   Reply to topic View latest: 24h 48h 72h

amother
Black


 

Post Sun, Mar 04 2018, 4:53 pm
OP you were not the only one, as others have stated. My cousin got stopped right before he was about to go over a bridge to drive home. The wind was making semi trucks tip over (!) and they closed the bridge. There was no where to go but to sit tight, he was stuck there for 3 hours before they re-opened the bridge. he got home waaaay after Shabbos had started. Please ignore ignorant posters who don't know what the weather was like here who said to walk and other nonsense. It was mamish a sakana to walk outside with falling trees and branches everywhere. Please also ignore the ignorant posters who say not to travel after chaztos on Friday. I myself have been vilified on this site for having a non-Jewish nanny by the holier-than-thou who don't understand that when you get home on Friday 30 minutes before Shabbos in the winter, a frum babysitter is not going to work for you. Pleeeeeeease remind yourself that you did the best you could under the circumstances.
Back to top

amother
Blue


 

Post Sun, Mar 04 2018, 10:11 pm
amother wrote:
OP you were not the only one, as others have stated. My cousin got stopped right before he was about to go over a bridge to drive home. The wind was making semi trucks tip over (!) and they closed the bridge. There was no where to go but to sit tight, he was stuck there for 3 hours before they re-opened the bridge. he got home waaaay after Shabbos had started. Please ignore ignorant posters who don't know what the weather was like here who said to walk and other nonsense. It was mamish a sakana to walk outside with falling trees and branches everywhere. Please also ignore the ignorant posters who say not to travel after chaztos on Friday. I myself have been vilified on this site for having a non-Jewish nanny by the holier-than-thou who don't understand that when you get home on Friday 30 minutes before Shabbos in the winter, a frum babysitter is not going to work for you. Pleeeeeeease remind yourself that you did the best you could under the circumstances.


Thanks for this post. You definitely understand the realities of working in an inflexible job such that you have to work on friday too.

To everyone, I was not asking for you to judge me if what I did was right or wrong. I know I left in enough time and I know it is not my fault that the rabbis I called could not be reached for a pesak (one rav said call a cab but none was available).

I was asking HOW I AM SUPPOSED TO ARRANGE MY THOUGHTS TO THINK "GAM ZU LTOVA" WHICH DOESNT SEEM TO MAKE SENSE. I dont know how I am supposed to think about this in terms of "hashem has a plan" and I trust Him that this is good, but how could it be good im mechallel shabbos???this was?my only question.
Back to top

amother
Black


 

Post Mon, Mar 05 2018, 10:52 am
amother wrote:
Thanks for this post. You definitely understand the realities of working in an inflexible job such that you have to work on friday too.

To everyone, I was not asking for you to judge me if what I did was right or wrong. I know I left in enough time and I know it is not my fault that the rabbis I called could not be reached for a pesak (one rav said call a cab but none was available).

I was asking HOW I AM SUPPOSED TO ARRANGE MY THOUGHTS TO THINK "GAM ZU LTOVA" WHICH DOESNT SEEM TO MAKE SENSE. I dont know how I am supposed to think about this in terms of "hashem has a plan" and I trust Him that this is good, but how could it be good im mechallel shabbos???this was?my only question.


You're welcome. I think what you are saying is, you want to understand why Hashem would have orchestrated things so that you, and so many other people, were mechalel Shabbos.
Obviously we have no clue why Hashem does what He does. The best you can do, as at least one other poster suggested, is to try to derive some meaning for you. Some people needed this jolt to review hilchos Shabbos. Some people needed to realize it didn't bother them enough that they were mechalel Shabbos. Some people needed a wake-up call for something else. Some people needed to stop and say Thank You Hashem that I am given Shabbos, that under regular circumstances I would be home enjoying my Shabbos right now. Your only consolation to process this experience is to figure out if you can learn anything from it and only you know what that might be.
Back to top

Chana Miriam S




 
 
    
 

Post Mon, Mar 05 2018, 11:28 am
amother wrote:


I was asking HOW I AM SUPPOSED TO ARRANGE MY THOUGHTS TO THINK "GAM ZU LTOVA" WHICH DOESNT SEEM TO MAKE SENSE. I dont know how I am supposed to think about this in terms of "hashem has a plan" and I trust Him that this is good, but how could it be good im mechallel shabbos???this was?my only question.


Dear Hashem,

Thank you so much for getting me home safely last Friday. I know there were so many who did not make it home safely that day, and I am praying for them to have either speedy recoveries or that their Nechama’s should have aliyot.

Thank you for showing me your will so clearly. You wanted me to make it home for Shabbat safely, even if I did not make it home in time for Shabbat. As you know, I did everything in my power to get home in time for Shabbat, and it was your will that I get home safely after shabbat started. I am so grateful to you for all your blessings and also that you reminded me that your will is more important than mine. Making it home after shabbat began reinforced to me just how important it is to me to be shabbat observant, and also that it is important for me to align my will with yours and not yours with mine.

I’ve learned so much from this experience! Now I can truly say gam zu Le tova.
Back to top

amother
Babyblue


 

Post Mon, Mar 05 2018, 12:46 pm
amother wrote:
Thanks for this post. You definitely understand the realities of working in an inflexible job such that you have to work on friday too.

To everyone, I was not asking for you to judge me if what I did was right or wrong. I know I left in enough time and I know it is not my fault that the rabbis I called could not be reached for a pesak (one rav said call a cab but none was available).

I was asking HOW I AM SUPPOSED TO ARRANGE MY THOUGHTS TO THINK "GAM ZU LTOVA" WHICH DOESNT SEEM TO MAKE SENSE. I dont know how I am supposed to think about this in terms of "hashem has a plan" and I trust Him that this is good, but how could it be good im mechallel shabbos???this was?my only question.


If I learned anything from your posts it's that our understanding is limited. Sometimes we don't know the reason something happened. We learn to accept things that don't make sense and events that don't have happy endings.
My dh and I had a very bad trip on what was supposed to be a sixty minute drive one Erev Yom Tov. The weather was fine but a terrible accident and road closure almost caused us to be mechallel Shabbos. A few years later dh gave up the chance at a great job as it involved a similar drive on Fridays.
I'm not saying you should have done things differently. It seems you did everything you could. There are probably others though who read your post and learned to be more careful traveling on Friday. I'm not saying that's why this happened to you since of course there's no way we can know, but maybe if you see a drop of good came out of it you'll feel a little better.
Back to top

amother
Blue


 

Post Mon, Mar 05 2018, 4:48 pm
amother wrote:
You're welcome. I think what you are saying is, you want to understand why Hashem would have orchestrated things so that you, and so many other people, were mechalel Shabbos.
Obviously we have no clue why Hashem does what He does. The best you can do, as at least one other poster suggested, is to try to derive some meaning for you. Some people needed this jolt to review hilchos Shabbos. Some people needed to realize it didn't bother them enough that they were mechalel Shabbos. Some people needed a wake-up call for something else. Some people needed to stop and say Thank You Hashem that I am given Shabbos, that under regular circumstances I would be home enjoying my Shabbos right now. Your only consolation to process this experience is to figure out if you can learn anything from it and only you know what that might be.


Thanks everyone for responding.

If it happened BC I needed a wake up call, then it means I didn't keep shabbos right or... But I've always kept shabbos as best as I could. I always have everything ready in time even though I work Fridays. Did I do something wrong and this a punishment?? If so, I dont know how to move on BC I try hard to bring shabbos in calmly with everything ready even though I'm forced to work Fridays.
Back to top

amother
Gold


 

Post Thu, Mar 15 2018, 5:20 am
b from nj wrote:
Hashem didnt force you to be mechallel shabbos & please don't hate yourself.

Things happen that are beyond our control sometimes and we just have to do the best we can to go on and continue trying to do the mitzvos properly but sometimes things just happen.

A few weeks ago I was dealing with a troubling situation and I forgot to light candles and only noticed it after it was already too late to light. I don't think Hashem hates me b/c of my oversight. I'm sure He understands that things happen and that is just life.

Please be kind to yourself and just keep on trying to do the best you can!

Hugs!


That happened to me once and our Rabbi told me that I have to light an extra candle.
Back to top
Page 3 of 3 Previous  1  2  3 Recent Topics




Post new topic   Reply to topic    Forum -> Interesting Discussions

Related Topics Replies Last Post
Why does everyone hate on Maaser so much?
by amother
8 Today at 6:41 am View last post
Shabbos pants for elementary boys
by amother
9 Today at 6:18 am View last post
Kids shabbos shoes affordable. Let's make a list!
by amother
63 Yesterday at 10:17 pm View last post
Last minute opportunity for a Shabbos getaway
by amother
5 Yesterday at 7:14 pm View last post
Amazon shabbos top
by amother
5 Yesterday at 5:04 pm View last post