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Forum
-> Parenting our children
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amother
White
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 Sun, Mar 11 2018, 3:19 pm
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So my dd is 5 and has a good friend who isn't religious. The mom and I are old friends and still live in the same place and we are thrilled that our daughters get along. But it's the little things, for example, like when they sit down to eat and dd has to wash and say brachot and her friend doesn't. How do I explain these kinds of things?
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causemommysaid
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Sun, Mar 11 2018, 3:27 pm
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Hmmm. Tough one. I guess just say we do things differently. In our house we are religious so we do certain mitzvahs that others don't do.
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amother
Black
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Mon, Mar 12 2018, 3:08 am
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Religious people aren't taught. We don"t comment and we do our thing. We can pray for them. We DONT comment.
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amother
Aubergine
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Mon, Mar 12 2018, 3:19 am
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Some people don't wash their hands after using the restroom. Do we really need to explain to our children why we do and they don't? You just do your thing. Every family has its own culture.
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amother
Burlywood
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Mon, Mar 12 2018, 1:50 pm
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"Some people don't know about mitzvas. But we don't want to embarrass them so we don't point it out."
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amother
Navy
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Mon, Mar 12 2018, 2:17 pm
| amother wrote: | | So my dd is 5 and has a good friend who isn't religious. The mom and I are old friends and still live in the same place and we are thrilled that our daughters get along. But it's the little things, for example, like when they sit down to eat and dd has to wash and say brachot and her friend doesn't. How do I explain these kinds of things? |
You have to figure out also what you want your dd attitude's towards non-religious Jews to be - and tailor communication accordingly. ( I would imagine this should mirror your own attitude).
what do you want to her to think?
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debsey
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Mon, Mar 12 2018, 4:57 pm
| amother wrote: | | So my dd is 5 and has a good friend who isn't religious. The mom and I are old friends and still live in the same place and we are thrilled that our daughters get along. But it's the little things, for example, like when they sit down to eat and dd has to wash and say brachot and her friend doesn't. How do I explain these kinds of things? |
Your daughter doesn't "have" to sit down and wash and say brachos.
She "gets" to sit down and wash and say brachos.
She's lucky - she knows what Hashem expects of her, and acts accordingly. One day, her friend will hopefully learn the same.
I think explaining it with that reframe, but explaining that it's not her place to say this to her friend and make her friend feel bad, will suffice.
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