Marrying cousins and genetic diseases

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amother

Ginger

Tue, Mar 13 2018, 10:49 pm

I highly doubt people who believe it's fine to do shidduchim with close cousins are going to believe in doing interventions to prevent passing on probelematic genes. So all the testing is worthless.

amother

Chocolate

Wed, Mar 14 2018, 12:23 am

A newlywed couple goes to open a bank account.
Bank Officer: Sir, your name please?
DH: Yankel Twersky
Bank Officer: And your mother's maiden name?
DH: Twersky
Bank Officer (scratches head): Mrs. Twersky, what is your maiden name?
DW: Twersky
Bank Officer: and your mother's maiden name?
DW: Twersky
Officer: Sir, Madam, it seems you don't understand what maiden name means.
DH and DW: No, sir, you don't understand what Twersky means.

/you can substitute Halberstam/Hager/Teitelbaum here/

amother

Brown

Wed, Mar 14 2018, 12:50 am

amother wrote:

Lol, this is a nice chasidish joke. Love it

chocolatecake

Wed, Mar 14 2018, 3:32 am

My mothers grandparents were first cousins, born and died in europe. Two of my mothers first cousins married each other. (One grew up in america, one in israel. They met when she was in sem and liked each other) When they wanted to get married some people were very nervous about genetics because they were first cousins and the grandchildren of first cousins and there is no way to know how inbred the family was back in europe. Its around 35 years later and they bh have 5 healthy kids.

imasoftov

Wed, Mar 14 2018, 10:40 am

amother wrote:

Happens by some very Rebbish ultra people

Before genetics, nobilities inbred themselves nearly to extinction out of ignorance. Nowadays there's no excuse.

amother

Lemon

Thu, Sep 12 2019, 3:28 pm

amother [ Royalblue ] wrote:

I was on vacation once with a Belzer and she said that cousins marrying is common in her circles.

Oh Really? I know the opposite to be true.
The Belzer Rebbe shlita is against cousins marrying cousins.

naomi2

Thu, Sep 12 2019, 3:40 pm

Speak to a geneticist. There may be things to take into consideration that we dont know about

whewpy

Thu, Sep 12 2019, 5:11 pm

Dor yeshorim is familiar with various strains associated with specific families. It its relatives, u need to tell them and they will do specific testing applicable to that family

polka dots

Thu, Sep 12 2019, 5:11 pm

amother [ Blonde ] wrote:

I'll break it down like this:
A and B are first cousins, they are married
Their child C is going to marry D, a second cousin.
One parent of D is a first cousin to both A and B.
So out of four parents, three are first cousinsand

You basically lost me somewhere in the middle. You should listen to “I am my own grandpa”

amother

Salmon

Thu, Sep 12 2019, 5:31 pm

Please don’t do it. I have a relative who married her first cousin. She definitely did dor yeshurim, I don’t know if she did any extra testing.

Bh her oldest child is healthy. But she had 2 more children who had rare genetic problems. They lived a few months in the hospital basically as a vegetable before they were niftar. They did lots of testing to find out what disease these children had, and after a few years were still not able to get a diagnosis.

No one knows if it was caused by her being married to her cousin. Maybe it was a fluke. But it’s so not the risk, it can cause so much suffering and heartache. And what your relative is doing is way worse, since they are related even more closely.

amother

Seagreen

Thu, Sep 12 2019, 5:47 pm

Whilst not life threatening or life limiting, I know that there are many many children born with severe deafness in the Muslim communities where marrying close relatives is very common.

amother

Purple

Thu, Sep 12 2019, 5:53 pm

I have a friend that married her first cousin. She has one healthy child and lost two children .

amother

Burgundy

Thu, Sep 12 2019, 6:58 pm

I am one who married a second cousin. I have one child with a hearing issue which no doctors were able to say a cause other than it might be genetic. We got in touch with dor yeshorim if we should do further genetic testing(we did basic dy screening before engagement) and after studying our case in depth we were advised not to mostly because ther really is nothing we can do at this point as his issue is relatively mild. What he did tell us though was that iyh by our kids shidduchim the hearing gene has already been found and we’ll be able to do additional testing before finalizing on a shidduch.
I totally didn’t know at the time I was of age that marrying cousins carries a greater risk of genetic diseases. I always wonder how my life would’ve turned out had I not married my dh for that reason....
We have a wonderful solid marriage and for that I am forever grateful!

amother

Oak

Thu, Sep 12 2019, 7:13 pm

My grandmother's parents were first cousins. They were very much in love. They lost 4 babies, and while we'll never know for sure, I do wonder if being cousins was a cause.

itsmeima

Thu, Sep 12 2019, 7:58 pm

amother [ Lavender ] wrote:

This is anecdotal but I have this. My in-laws and mother are all first cousins to each other so my kids are great grandchildren of three siblings. I have five healthy children. No miscarriages.

ahhhh, then OP you can definitely go ahead!

FranticFrummie

Thu, Sep 12 2019, 8:34 pm

Watch this documentaries, and then decide: I could cite studies, but actually looking at families gives the message over in a much clearer way.

amother

Green

Thu, Sep 12 2019, 11:14 pm

I know a couple who are first cousins. They did dor yeshorim. 2 of their 6 kids have a serious genetic disease.

amother

Gray

Thu, Sep 12 2019, 11:40 pm

It goes closer than cousins in some communities - uncles marrying nieces. I always wondered how you can look at your siblings' kids and see potential spouses.

My first cousin asked me to marry him. I was weirded out. Then my aunt tried to talk me into the marriage.

amother

Aubergine

Fri, Sep 13 2019, 3:01 am

amother [ Burgundy ] wrote:

My parents were NOT related b4 they got married- I have 2 siblings that are hearing impaired - turns out that its genetic - if 2 ppl with that same gene get married there are big chances that the kids will be hearing impaired.... Dor Yesharim does NOT test for it - there is a separate test for that - (forgot the name of it offhand) it used to take weeks to get results - therefore delaying a shidduch etc -however todays days it takes a day or two.... All my siblings are a carrier of this gene - however we all bh got married to non carriers and bh all of our kids have 100% hearing ability.

amother

Mauve

Fri, Sep 13 2019, 3:08 am

This thread is from 2018

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