Why cover your hair when wearing a mini skirt??

shiaeisen

Thu, May 03 2018, 5:46 pm

I’m very sad about the lowering of tznius standards in Brooklyn. But what shocks me most is, today for instance, I saw a woman wearing a mini skirt (yes, mini, not just an inch or two above knees), and short sleeves, and....covering her hair! I just wondered what this woman is thinking! Does she think it’s assur to not cover hair, but muttar to wear minis and short sleeves? Aside from the halachic implications, I think she just looks ridiculous, a walking lesson in hypocrisy. Anyone?

PurpleandGold

Thu, May 03 2018, 5:50 pm

I think you should look at life and mitzvos without an all or nothing attitude. Very unhealthy and actually not in accordance with Torah hashkafa.

Each mitzvah will illuminate the area of the body it impacts, and become the spiritual clothing we wear in the next world. If she won't have "perfect" spiritual garments for her knees, why shouldn't she have a spiritual crown for her head?

thunderstorm

Thu, May 03 2018, 5:54 pm

First of all it's not our business. But besides there are women who wear wigs because it looks better than their hair. I know people that wear pants and a wig and are frum. We don't all fit in the same box of "frum" and it's not our place to look and judge others.

enneamom

Thu, May 03 2018, 6:02 pm

She might be a BT who is taking on one thing at a time.

She might be slipping OTD but clinging to her head covering.

She might not know better.

Either way, at least she's doing something right.

SixOfWands

Thu, May 03 2018, 6:02 pm

shiaeisen wrote:

So, if you don't do everything absolutely perfectly -- as judged by shiaeisen -- you shouldn't do anything at all. If, for example you spoke lashon hara, everything else you've done is worthless. You might as well eat a ham and cheese sandwich on Yom Kippur.

Do you have a source for that?

leah233

Thu, May 03 2018, 6:03 pm

Just because she does one thing wrong doesn't mean she should do everything wrong.

I heard from older women that in the 1950s it was common for women who came from a certain country in Europe to be Makpid on covering their hair but they would wear short sleeves and pants. While the women coming from a certain other country in Europe were Makpid on other areas of Tznius but didn't all cover their hair.

Neither group claimed to be doing it with the approval of their respective Rabbonim.

watergirl

Thu, May 03 2018, 6:07 pm

Or...

Today I saw the most inspiring thing. I saw a woman who is holding on to the mitzvah of kisui rosh even though it may be hard for her. She had a short skirt on and short sleeves and yet there she was, with a head covering. And in this heat! I can only imagine the schar that she’ll be getting for this. I take it for granted that because I follow all of the rules, others will also. It’s a challange for some. I wish her all the best.

WhatFor

Thu, May 03 2018, 6:10 pm

Some people cover their hair as a fashion statement. Some people cover their hair because they're undergoing chemo.

Some people hold short sleeves are okay but that they need (or want) to cover their hair.

Some people hold that everything must be covered but for whatever reason, they're not in a place where they can but they still try to cover their hair.

Some people are totally not religious but are going to visit frum relatives so out of respect are covering their hair, but they didn't get the memo about the rest of it.

Some people cover everything even though they're being rude and obnoxious and not tzenuah in every other way.

Also, side note but a mini skirt is the kind of skirt that cheerleaders wear. Like the kind that the butt is visible if you're two steps below them and you look up. Was she actually wearing a mini skirt or did you mean a short skirt?

dancingqueen

Thu, May 03 2018, 6:26 pm

thunderstorm wrote:

ITA. I don’t cover but I can see getting a sheital in the future. As women get older those wearing sheitals often look better than those who don’t. Especially today’s sheitals that are so glamorous. Most women look better with them on.

Gerbera

Thu, May 03 2018, 6:50 pm

I think we should look at what people are doing rather than focusing on what they are not doing. Its absolutely no one's business why people choose to observe some things and not others. Are you aware that people wear wigs for medical reasons? Leave the woman be. We should focus on improving ourselves and not wondering about other people. Should we wonder why you choose to cover your hair and dress tzanua yet you would like to gossip about a woman? That's picking and choosing what to observe as well. Unfortunately our community is full of ppl who dress the dress but certainly don't act the part...just read a handful of threads on here

SixOfWands

Thu, May 03 2018, 7:20 pm

Cancer.

People cover their hair while wearing miniskirts and tank tops when they have cancer, and have lost their hair.

Feel better about judging?

leah233

Thu, May 03 2018, 7:30 pm

For a group that is so non-judgmental can't you accept that someone can really be bothered by a major breach in tznius? Or to paraphrase the OPs question are you all really so strict about never judging other Jews or are there certain type of behaviors that you can't tolerate people being judged for but otherwise judge away?

pesek zman

Thu, May 03 2018, 7:33 pm

watergirl wrote:

This is what I think. Covering your hair is a deliberate choice.

simba

Thu, May 03 2018, 7:35 pm

Thanks Leah, I was going to come to OP'a defense as well but don't have the time to explain myself now. It is bothersome to those of us who live in insular communities and pretty much know that these people do not have cancer and are not bt's on the way in. Sheitel's stay longer then the rest of Tznius for various reasons. I guess at least that but it doesn't it make it right or less of a breach.

thunderstorm

Thu, May 03 2018, 7:36 pm

leah233 wrote:

This is a BIG problem in our little world. Instead of focusing on our own shortfalls and judging ourselves we tend to throw judgment on others instead. I try very hard to give people the benefit of the doubt no matter what they are doing. I can't say I always succeed. But when I do find myself casting judgment on others I question myself " what is wrong with you? What failing do you have now that is causing you to judge others". I learned this chazal in highschool and carry it with me: "kol haposel bimumo posel" . Just speaking for myself here .

anon for this

Thu, May 03 2018, 7:38 pm

leah233 wrote:

If you're talking to me, then my answer is that yes, I do generally try to avoid judging other people. But I'm particularly averse to judging other women for how they dress, because I don't see how that affects other people. And because it seems to me that women are too often judged for their clothing.

jkl

Thu, May 03 2018, 7:38 pm

leah233 wrote:

Being bothered by something is one thing. Berating an anonymous woman, and calling her a hypocrite is another thing.

If she would have been only bothered by it, she would have only described her own feelings. I.e. how she gets saddened by it, and how it affects her when someone appears to not be following the Halacha and perhaps find a way to be Dan L'kaf Zchus. Instead, she chose to attack the woman, labeling her ridiculous, "a 'walking lesson in hypocrisy" and mocking her halachic knowledge. That is the epitome of judgmental and self-righteous behaviors.