Home
Log in / Sign Up
    Private Messages   Advanced Search   Rules   New User Guide   FAQ   Advertise   Contact Us  
Forum -> Parenting our children -> Teenagers and Older children
Packages in sleepover camp
Previous  1  2  3  Next



Post new topic   Reply to topic View latest: 24h 48h 72h

amother
Lilac


 

Post Thu, Jul 05 2018, 8:11 pm
Such a sore topic for me.

The pain of being the only girl without visitors year after year. I was so young and alone. The hurt and the shame.

Of course I never received any packages. I didn’t even exist!

Op anything u can send that would show your child that she’s loved and not forgotten is good.
Back to top

amother
Pewter


 

Post Thu, Jul 05 2018, 11:46 pm
I just received a text message from my dd camp that they will not allow any more packages if ppl continue to send so many. They had over 150 packages on Friday alone. There is no reason kids need these huge care packages. They are sent to camp fully stocked with everything they could possibly need or want down to rugs for the floor. If someone left something important at home I can understand sending it but anything else is totally not necessary.
Back to top

trixx




 
 
    
 

Post Fri, Jul 06 2018, 2:48 am
ces wrote:
I ordered a few bags of nosh and a jar of pickles from Target using Google Express. Free delivery to camp and after applying promo codes came out pretty cheap!


SO SMART

amother wrote:
If you can do this, please make an effort to. I was one of those people who never, ever (in ten years of camp) got a package. It would have made me feel so loved. Put in a little note and some of her favorite nosh. Or some homemade food that doesn't need refrigeration. Plus any little tchachke she might like.


This.

amother wrote:
I just received a text message from my dd camp that they will not allow any more packages if ppl continue to send so many. They had over 150 packages on Friday alone. There is no reason kids need these huge care packages. They are sent to camp fully stocked with everything they could possibly need or want down to rugs for the floor. If someone left something important at home I can understand sending it but anything else is totally not necessary.


Then ban packages for everyone. But as soon as one girl is getting a package, you need to send to your daughter too. As mentioned above - it can be a postcard, letter, email, a small flat rate envelope with candy or cookies. Literally anything and postage can be the most expensive part. It's just a very small but extremely important way to let your child know you are thinking of them.

My parents did come for visiting day - driving 2 hours to do so - but they came at 1pm and some years I was the last kid on the camp grounds, with the special trip for the non-visiting campers already having left at 11am. I maybe once got a package in like 10 years. Emails and postcards from my mother were super lame ("hi how are you? we're good! bye!") but appreciated.

It seriously takes so little to make your kid feel good. Build resilience and refuse to give into shtus another way.

Forestgreen, I'm right with you.
Back to top

Ruchel




 
 
    
 

Post Fri, Jul 06 2018, 3:55 am
I got one weekly. Couldn't finish it, and the jealousy was over the top. Be careful.
Back to top

Raisin




 
 
    
 

Post Fri, Jul 06 2018, 7:17 am
I never got packages in camp and never felt deprived. (it was a 2 week camp) Very few others did either. We all came from large families. Honestly I was just happy my parents could afford to send me to camp some years.

I do try and send packages to my kids in camp but the postal service is not super reliable. I sent my dd with tons of nosh so not sure she needs any more.
Back to top

PinkFridge




 
 
    
 

Post Fri, Jul 06 2018, 7:46 am
trixx wrote:

It seriously takes so little to make your kid feel good. Build resilience and refuse to give into shtus another way.

.


Excellent point.
And re your parents coming at 1:00. I don't know your story but what about parents who have to visit a few camps the same day?
Back to top

amother
Indigo


 

Post Fri, Jul 06 2018, 8:14 am
This thread is making me think about my son's experience in camp for the last three years.
He absolutely loves this camp, but unfortunately it's made up of a lot of kids from homes where they live very very well. It's the norm for most of the kids in his bunk to receive multiple packages a week (food, new clothing, toys), culminating with the pre-shabbos care package of challah, kugel, deli, and pastries.
The first year he went, we sent him one package a week because he was so gutted with jealousy. This was in addition to the food we sent him with, and the additional treats we brought on visiting day.
The second year, it got a lot worse, and we decided to put our foot down, considering that camp is expensive enough as it is (as is outfitting him for camp) without sending a package weekly, and limited ourselves to one package for his July birthday.
This year, even though the camp has instituted a size limitation on packages (shoebox size), few are abiding by it. Also, his birthday falls out after he's home. So we made it clear that there would be no packages. We explained that he is so lucky to go to camp, and that we love him a lot and send him with lots of food, and a nice amount of canteen money. We also are bringing a lot of nice treats on visiting day, and we'll do something fun together. We also explained that he is old enough to understand that people come from different types of families, and in our family it does not make financial sense for us to send a package every week just because everyone else gets 3, and it doesn't mean he's not as awesome as the boys who have fresh pastrami for shabbos.
He wasn't too happy, but he does love camp, so he accepted it.
Sigh.
Back to top

saw50st8




 
 
    
 

Post Fri, Jul 06 2018, 8:15 am
I never got packages in camp. Some kids did, but not all. I really hate that this has become a thing. I will probably send them something just because but I'm not a fan.
Back to top

amother
Seafoam


 

Post Fri, Jul 06 2018, 8:26 am
I don't know if this is a factor or not, but in some families it's a given that when a kid turns 9 or 10, the kids go to sleep way camp, often for the whole summer. Part of the idea is to send the kid away along with of course giving them a great experience, so there could be that feeling of whether or not your parent is thinking about you. In my family going to sleepaway was a huge privilege and I only started going later (going into 8th grade/ 12/13 years old ) and that was already such a huge treat for me- visiting day and packages were not even a consideration- and the fact that I was on camp itself was my parents gift to me!
I hear today might be different with so many people going to camp from a young age, but some things are getting over the top with the "norms" and "needs"
Back to top

Ruchel




 
 
    
 

Post Fri, Jul 06 2018, 8:28 am
Visit? No. People often work, or at least the father, if kids are away. OR they take a vacay together. OR they simply cannot drive hundreds.
Back to top

saw50st8




 
 
    
 

Post Fri, Jul 06 2018, 8:59 am
Ruchel wrote:
Visit? No. People often work, or at least the father, if kids are away. OR they take a vacay together. OR they simply cannot drive hundreds.


In the US, visiting day is on Sunday when the majority of people are off. People are driving relatively short distances that can be easily done in a day (1-4 hours). Kids who are in camp far away from their family understand that it's impractical for their parents to come and camps often do something fun for them instead.
Back to top

amother
Maroon


 

Post Fri, Jul 06 2018, 9:15 am
Wow, how interesting. I'm a BT, and went to a non-Jewish camp starting in elementary school. Packages? Nope. I wonder if this is a "Jewish camp" phenomenon, or just that expectations have changed over a generation or so.
Back to top

trixx




 
 
    
 

Post Fri, Jul 06 2018, 9:19 am
PinkFridge wrote:
Excellent point.
And re your parents coming at 1:00. I don't know your story but what about parents who have to visit a few camps the same day?


Idk, we never had that. The only reason they came late was not having left early enough (not work, traffic, etc)
Back to top

Chayalle




 
 
    
 

Post Fri, Jul 06 2018, 9:22 am
amother wrote:
This thread is making me think about my son's experience in camp for the last three years.
He absolutely loves this camp, but unfortunately it's made up of a lot of kids from homes where they live very very well. It's the norm for most of the kids in his bunk to receive multiple packages a week (food, new clothing, toys), culminating with the pre-shabbos care package of challah, kugel, deli, and pastries.
The first year he went, we sent him one package a week because he was so gutted with jealousy. This was in addition to the food we sent him with, and the additional treats we brought on visiting day.
The second year, it got a lot worse, and we decided to put our foot down, considering that camp is expensive enough as it is (as is outfitting him for camp) without sending a package weekly, and limited ourselves to one package for his July birthday.
This year, even though the camp has instituted a size limitation on packages (shoebox size), few are abiding by it. Also, his birthday falls out after he's home. So we made it clear that there would be no packages. We explained that he is so lucky to go to camp, and that we love him a lot and send him with lots of food, and a nice amount of canteen money. We also are bringing a lot of nice treats on visiting day, and we'll do something fun together. We also explained that he is old enough to understand that people come from different types of families, and in our family it does not make financial sense for us to send a package every week just because everyone else gets 3, and it doesn't mean he's not as awesome as the boys who have fresh pastrami for shabbos.
He wasn't too happy, but he does love camp, so he accepted it.
Sigh.


I really like this post, because I'm big into teaching kids that we don't have to do everything everyone else does, and we don't have to buy into every mishegas everyone else has. It's so refreshing to see parents who have a talk with their child, and that in itself builds a child much more than endless treats just to keep up with everyone else.

My DD went to a camp one summer that had alot of Sephardi girls, and their mothers would send them pans of Mazzah for every Shabbos - like 9X13 pans full. DD was friends with all of them and enjoyed their treats. She didn't expect me to make the Ashkenazi version of these on a weekly basis! My kids know that DH and I work hard to be able to send them to camp, and that in itself is a privilege. We do try to send them up with nosh, etc...and they earn their own canteen money and have enough.

Still, I did make the effort to sometimes send a treat if I knew someone going who could take. Not weekly, not elaborate, but a batch of rugalach or chocolate chip cookies to make them feel like we didn't forget them just because they were away.

I'm not much of a letter/postcard writer, but we did call them whenever we could.

I went to visiting day every year - a 3-4 hour trip each way. To be honest I have mixed feelings about it....It really is such a shlep, and so overcrowded, so hot.... One year DD told me I really don't have to come, but in the end, I came anyway, because I sensed that underneath that, she really did want me to come.

I think every child is different, so you really have to know what your child really needs. There are some kids who are fine, and why should their parent shlep....and some have posted here how badly they felt when no one came.
Back to top

saw50st8




 
 
    
 

Post Fri, Jul 06 2018, 9:35 am
amother wrote:
Wow, how interesting. I'm a BT, and went to a non-Jewish camp starting in elementary school. Packages? Nope. I wonder if this is a "Jewish camp" phenomenon, or just that expectations have changed over a generation or so.


I think expectations have changed as well as the ease of shipping. It is so easy to buy something on amazon and send it.
Back to top

amother
Honeydew


 

Post Fri, Jul 06 2018, 9:40 am
This is our first year sending a child to camp. The camp doesn't allow any food packages, which I am very happy about. We sent DD with plenty of snacks and will bring her some stuff on visiting day. We send the occasional letter and email, and I think the grandparents will be sending a package or two of some random stuff she wants. I tucked a surprise into her luggage before she left and she had fresh baked cookies to bring on the bus. I think that's plenty of attention so that she knows we are thinking about her and otherwise she doesn't need anything just because.
Back to top

amother
Natural


 

Post Fri, Jul 06 2018, 9:44 am
I'm posting anonymously to avoid the tomatoes, but why do the kids need all the junk/nosh?? I get that they like receiving packages, but why does it have to be food?
Back to top

thunderstorm




 
 
    
 

Post Fri, Jul 06 2018, 11:37 am
If you give your child ample canteen money, I agree extra nosh is not necessary.
My mother gave me $10 canteen money for a half a summer. That didn't even cover 10 ice creams. When I went to camp, every Friday we ordered an ice cream or ices for Shalosh Seudos . This was a camp requirement/expectation. The iceream bars in those days were over $1.00 in the canteen.
That left me with no money for any snacks during the week. If we had a trip, everyone ordered Nosh and drinks from the canteen but I didn't have any money. So I went on a trip empty handed unless I had some nosh from a package or that a bunk mate shared with me.
Also, there were times we earned privileges . Once to go to town to buy pizza and a different time to order soft icecream. It was a privilege the bunk earned. But I didn't have any money , so I couldn't purchase anything. I went to the pizza store and ogled everyone else's cheesy pizza and fries while I sat hungry .
Without a care package, occasional petty cash , inadequate canteen money, and no visitor on visiting day, it made me feel really uncared for. Thankfully I loved camp and it took my mind off any of those negative feelings but it did bother me in the immediate moment when I was not able to be a part of everyone else.
Back to top

PinkFridge




 
 
    
 

Post Fri, Jul 06 2018, 11:40 am
amother wrote:
I'm posting anonymously to avoid the tomatoes, but why do the kids need all the junk/nosh?? I get that they like receiving packages, but why does it have to be food?


If not food, then what? What else do they need that they haven't brought? And if it's a thing they'll want to hold onto and treasure, they certainly don't want to bring something like that to camp.

Besides, how else do we show our love? Wink
Back to top

keym




 
 
    
 

Post Fri, Jul 06 2018, 11:46 am
PinkFridge wrote:
If not food, then what? What else do they need that they haven't brought? And if it's a thing they'll want to hold onto and treasure, they certainly don't want to bring something like that to camp.

Besides, how else do we show our love? Wink


I liked food because it could run cheap and its easily shared.
Also many camps food leave a lot to be desired so food is appreciated. Especially the cookies type.
Back to top
Page 2 of 3 Previous  1  2  3  Next Recent Topics




Post new topic   Reply to topic    Forum -> Parenting our children -> Teenagers and Older children

Related Topics Replies Last Post
Camp Tubby packing newbie
by amother
8 Today at 8:20 am View last post
What are you paying for backyard camp?
by amother
0 Yesterday at 1:35 pm View last post
Camp Dilemma
by amother
6 Yesterday at 11:46 am View last post
Camp Maaminim very selective
by amother
12 Wed, Mar 27 2024, 5:54 pm View last post
Brechers camp
by shev
0 Thu, Mar 21 2024, 9:14 pm View last post
by shev