Packages in sleepover camp

amother

Amber

Fri, Jul 06 2018, 11:50 am

trixx wrote:

Then ban packages for everyone. But as soon as one girl is getting a package, you need to send to your daughter too. As mentioned above - it can be a postcard, letter, email, a small flat rate envelope with candy or cookies. Literally anything and postage can be the most expensive part. It's just a very small but extremely important way to let your child know you are thinking of them.

My kids' camps did ban packages except for necessities. Yes, you could send socks, but not food. Yes, they did inspect all packages.

trixx wrote:

My parents did come for visiting day - driving 2 hours to do so - but they came at 1pm and some years I was the last kid on the camp grounds, with the special trip for the non-visiting campers already having left at 11am. I maybe once got a package in like 10 years. Emails and postcards from my mother were super lame ("hi how are you? we're good! bye!") but appreciated.

Oyyy. I hope they tipped well. When my kids were counselors, they had to stay with their kids until parents came or they went on the trip, then they were free to visit their own families, or have the day off. Since they also needed to be back at 3 or 4, for kids whose parents left by then, your counselors missed a day off.

amother

Smokey

Fri, Jul 06 2018, 1:05 pm

Food does not have to be junk food, although I do send that since it does not bother me. But for those who do not want to send their kids junk, my experience has been that the following will be very appreciated by a camper, depending on their taste:

Pickles
Cans of Baby Corn
Cans of Hearts of Palm (my very picky daughter is obsessed with them!)
Noodle soups (I know it's not healthy, but sometimes the kids hate the dinner in camp so it's a meal substitute)
Cereal (selection at camp may not be great)
Popcorn
Pretzels

The bottom line is to send them something they like and that shows that you are thinking about them when they are away.

amother

Dodgerblue

Fri, Jul 06 2018, 2:12 pm

This thread made me realize that I’m still hurting 15 years later. I was the only girl in camp with no visitors and my parents lived in the same city as all the other parents. I rem walking around on visiting day with that empty feeling in me. Boy it’s bringing me to tears even now. Forget about ever getting packages or letters.
What stands out most in my memory was the summer I was in the 7th grade. I HATED camp that summer but my parents made me stay. It was the first time most of my friends had to fast so my entire bunk (literally, not one kid stayed) went home for Tisha b’av. I called up my mom to get the requisite permission to leave camp but she refused. I begged and pleaded, cried and screamed but she told me to stay. I faked it to my friends and told them I don’t mind staying. But the next day a friend of my mother’s daughter announced in front of all my friends that her mom told her I really wanted to go home and my mother stood her ground and didn’t let me. It was mortifying.
And supposedly I come from a ‘notmal’ Home. But the older I get the more I see how unloved I was

Amelia Bedelia

Fri, Jul 06 2018, 2:28 pm

thunderstorm wrote:

If you give your child ample canteen money, I agree extra nosh is not necessary.
My mother gave me $10 canteen money for a half a summer. That didn't even cover 10 ice creams. When I went to camp, every Friday we ordered an ice cream or ices for Shalosh Seudos . This was a camp requirement/expectation. The iceream bars in those days were over $1.00 in the canteen.
That left me with no money for any snacks during the week. If we had a trip, everyone ordered Nosh and drinks from the canteen but I didn't have any money. So I went on a trip empty handed unless I had some nosh from a package or that a bunk mate shared with me.
Also, there were times we earned privileges . Once to go to town to buy pizza and a different time to order soft icecream. It was a privilege the bunk earned. But I didn't have any money , so I couldn't purchase anything. I went to the pizza store and ogled everyone else's cheesy pizza and fries while I sat hungry .
Without a care package, occasional petty cash , inadequate canteen money, and no visitor on visiting day, it made me feel really uncared for. Thankfully I loved camp and it took my mind off any of those negative feelings but it did bother me in the immediate moment when I was not able to be a part of everyone else.

Maybe this should be a spin-off, but thunderstorm's post about earning privileges reminded me of my camp experience when the camp would "treat" us to a trip to the pizza shop about three times in four weeks, yet would expect us to pay for it. Pizza at home was a real treat. My mom would serve store-bought pizza for supper 3-4 times a YEAR! I didn't see the need to be served store-bought pizza so many times in less than a month and would have preferred not to use my own money to pay for my lunch when my parents paid so much money for my camp experience. I'm wondering if it is typical of camps to do this, offer their campers the "privilege" of paying for their own lunch.

amother

Burgundy

Fri, Jul 06 2018, 3:43 pm

amother wrote:

I agree. Also little cans of Blue Diamond flavored almonds. Natural fruit snacks like Matt's Munchies. Pull top cups of applesauce or applesauce squeezies.

Chayalle

Fri, Jul 06 2018, 4:41 pm

keym wrote:

I liked food because it could run cheap and its easily shared.
Also many camps food leave a lot to be desired so food is appreciated. Especially the cookies type.

My kids used to ask me to bring them fruit when I came on visiting day. You know, peaches, plums, cherries....they said the camp's fruit were of a quality that left much to be desired. I used to bring up a bag of juicy fruit, and enjoy watching them work their way thru it....

Chayalle

Fri, Jul 06 2018, 4:43 pm

Amelia Bedelia wrote:

I've never understood this either. And in the camp my DD attended, those who got no visitors on visiting day were treated to....a trip to the Pizza shop, at their own expense.

amother

Goldenrod

Fri, Jul 06 2018, 7:24 pm

This whole thread seems to me just a sign of our times.
Kids MUST have so many things, it's ridiculous!!
Camp cost a fortune, BH my kids appreciate the sacrifice and BH all understand that not sending packages is not a sign they are not loved!!!
I've brought my kids up to appreciate things and not expect or demand anything!
They're well balanced!

I send emails daily telling them we love and miss them and update on what's going on.
I bring them a few ( very few treats on visiting day), I attempt to go every visiting day, but it can be very hard sometimes and they know before they go that we may not be able to visit.
They appreciate camp for what it is: CAMP, a chance to be in the mountains, learn independence and have a super duper time!
camp is a luxury as it is!

I discuss these things with my kids and they are all well balanced as a result!

We don't buy any of the "must haves" that everyone else has, on purpose, wether we can afford or not.
As a result, as my kids are growing up, they are in college after seminary and Yeshiva Gedolah, working full time and saving money as they don't spend on all the "musts"!!

I make sure my kids know love DOES NOT EQUAL packages of nosh sent to camp!! They also know that every family functions differently, we do many things that other families don't do!

naturalmom5

Sat, Jul 07 2018, 10:41 pm

amother wrote:

If you can do this, please make an effort to. I was one of those people who never, ever (in ten years of camp) got a package. It would have made me feel so loved. Put in a little note and some of her favorite nosh. Or some homemade food that doesn't need refrigeration. Plus any little tchachke she might like.

I sent my parenrs letters begging to come home and my mother send me a card
Name, Don't be a pill
Be a big girl Confused

amother

Chartreuse

Sun, Jul 08 2018, 1:37 am

I am proud to be employed at a mainstream Bais Yaakov type girls sleepaway teen camp which has been the first to exclude visiting day from their schedule three years ago. This year they have implemented a strict "no packages" rule. (If a girl needs deodorant or something important it needs to be cleared with the headstaff by a parent first). What a difference this makes! No jealousy. No feeding into spoiled rotten self entitled habits. Just a real wholesome camp experience! I hope other camps catch on real fast, as this is such a fantastic rule.
And like many other posters, as popular as I was, I wasn't the kinda kid that got packages in camp, and it hurt. Camp is a gift, a luxury, and packages are not necessary to make the experience complete.

rzab

Sun, Jul 08 2018, 5:22 am

saw50st8 wrote:

I never got packages in camp. Some kids did, but not all. I really hate that this has become a thing. I will probably send them something just because but I'm not a fan.

I dont think this is just "becoming a thing." I started going to camp in 1995 and it was def a thing back then.
Maybe it's become a bigger deal, but it was there.

also, I was the kid who didn't get any letters or packages and it was hard. it wasn't even so much that I needed anything, more like the acknowledgement from my parents that they missed having me around....