Teaching toddlers proper names for their anatomy

amother

Lawngreen

Wed, Aug 22 2018, 1:42 pm

I'd like my daughter to correctly refer to her anatomy- but I'm worried. Can this get her (us?) into trouble once she starts nursery in a BP Chasiddish (English speaking type) school?

NovelConcept

Wed, Aug 22 2018, 2:43 pm

Thunderstorm, I'm surprised at this posting of yours. I usually like your posts...

Why wouldn't English speaking chasidim understand, pray tell?

Please don't assume we are all ignoramuses. Really, I expected more from you.

amother

Scarlet

Wed, Aug 22 2018, 3:00 pm

Yes, if a kindergarten girl would use such big words in a chassidish school, you would be in trouble.
Why does a toddler need to know the exact word for everything?

Kiwi13

Wed, Aug 22 2018, 3:02 pm

There are different ways of approaching this issue. My personal belief is that as long as a child has a specific word for each body part you’re still okay. You can teach more later, but for safety reasons they need to have an effective word to tell you in case something happens chas vshalom.

amother

Forestgreen

Wed, Aug 22 2018, 3:24 pm

my personal opinion is that if you are particular that your child should only say abdomen or stomach instead of tummy, then using correct words is your philosophy and that's fine.

however if you have no problem with your child saying tummy, then you should also have no problem using a specific euphemism for their private parts as well. (a separate word for front and back, but it makes no difference what the word is)

there is no need to jump on the bandwagon of announcing to the word how liberal you are by teaching your kids anatomically correct but very un-kid friendly words.

unless of course this is your parenting style and you make sure to teach your child the difference between her stomach hurting and pain coming from her intestines. if that's the case then kudos to you.

amother

Azure

Wed, Aug 22 2018, 3:46 pm

I taught my four-year-old daughter the appropriate anatomical term for her parts, but I work in the women’s health field so I figure even if she says it out loud in school they’ll just chalk it up to what her mommy does for a living LOL

amother

Scarlet

Wed, Aug 22 2018, 3:48 pm

Amother azure, even if you do this for a living, some words are still inappropriate for a little kid to hear some terms at home & to know & say in school. It might be OK in more modern schools bet definitely not in more frum schools.

amother

Gray

Wed, Aug 22 2018, 3:52 pm

What words would you be teaching her? I can't stand when people are so busy teaching correct terms and then they go and teach their child that they urinate from their private part. If you think it's important to teach the correct terms use vulva or urethra, saying private part is just as bad as using any other nickname.

amother

Scarlet

Wed, Aug 22 2018, 3:58 pm

If my child would learn the word v-Gina from a kid her class, I would be very upset. I'm sure the teachers would be baffled if a kid mentions these words in school.

amother

Scarlet

Wed, Aug 22 2018, 5:56 pm

Amother sappire, id like to understand why you think it's important for kids to know the word vulva or aiver. When does your child use the word vulva???? I assure you that if your child would mention the word aiver in school they will be suspended.

simcha2

Wed, Aug 22 2018, 6:12 pm

amother wrote:

Why on earth would they be suspended? When you child is in the bath and says "what's this called?" What do you say?

amother

Sapphire

Wed, Aug 22 2018, 6:23 pm

amother wrote:

I grew up not knowing the names of those body parts until I was 14 or 15. I was shocked and thought it very wrong of my parents and community.

My dh and I both agreed to teach body parts names with no shame.

I may have trouble with their schools if they say those words, but I can’t imagine them bringing up their private parts at 5, 7 and 8 years old. If they do, I think it would be because they have an uncomfortable physical issue, like burning pain etc.

I’m raising my children not to talk about their privates to anyone but mommy or daddy.

amother

Azure

Wed, Aug 22 2018, 6:38 pm

Just to clarify, she knows these are words that are only said to parents or a doctor/grown up. It was helpful when she had a problem and was able to explain what body part bothered her. We don’t discuss these things out of the house. I felt it was important to teach the right words due to so many women and girls not having a proper understanding of their anatomy. It’s not like she prances around town yelling v@g!n@. There is nothing to be ashamed of and I don’t get it the shock of so many posters. She also know what her urethra is.

thunderstorm

Wed, Aug 22 2018, 7:03 pm

NovelConcept wrote:

I'm sorry . I didn't think anyone is an ignoramus. I guess I am the ignoramus. I grew up in an English speaking Chasidish home and I didn't know the real word of a woman's private part until , believe it or not , right before I got married . And I grew up in a very open minded home . We were not "educated" with the real words. Neither were the boys. I only knew what the boys private was called because of a neighbor who insisted on using the real words and would say "Yaakov make sure your pen-s is in the right place so that you don't urinate on the floor" when she was toilet training her two yr old.
I was referring to the girls classmates when I said they won't know what she is saying. I wasn't referring to the teachers.

amother

Scarlet

Wed, Aug 22 2018, 7:24 pm

Amother sappire, why is it wrong to learn the word vulva st 14-15?? Nothing to be shocked about. Your parents didn't wrong you. I can't fathom why it's important for a toddler to know this word.
I'm sure I'm not the only one with the opinion that a school will not tolerate kids saying the word p-enis.

amother

Wheat

Wed, Aug 22 2018, 7:33 pm

I don't make a point of teaching my child words that I don't use myself. Nor do I think my child has any innocence lost by knowing words. (or by knowing the significant anatomical difference between a boy and a girl).

(I'm not Chasidish - so not commenting on what OP should do).

Fox

Wed, Aug 22 2018, 7:59 pm

amother wrote:

I forgot it will change that word to private part lol. The word that annoys me is gina.

One of the latest things to get publicity is that transgender activists want medical guides, etc., to use the word "front hole" rather than [private part]. Apparently the "v-word" is triggering for some transgender individuals, thought I didn't quite get whether it's triggering for the trans folks who have one and wish they didn't or for those who don't and wish they did. Well, whatever!

Personally, "front hole" sounds to me like one of those euphemisms you claim you'll never use with kids -- until actually hear it coming out of your mouth. But maybe there's hope for the world! If transgender activists and parents of preschoolers can agree on euphemisms, the lion may indeed be ready to lie down with the lamb.

Very Happy