Crying at work. | Imamother

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Crying at work.

Forum -> Working Women

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amother

Red

Wed, Sep 12 2018, 10:14 pm

I was overtired, PMSing, and emotionally drained from spending Rosh Hashanah with my difficult family members when I came in to the office. Then I got assigned a new project at work- it’s got lots of really tight deadlines, and it’s very difficult, stressful work. Then my coworker reported me to our manager for doing something wrong. (I was trained in to do things the wrong way, and despite the fact that she’s pointed out the correct way of doing things to me before, I didn’t switch over to doing it because I was so used to doing things the wrong way. I was wrong in doing that, but she was wrong in going to our manager instead of discussing it with me.)

So I went outside, called a friend, and vented about work and my family. I was hysterical- talking loudly, angrily... It was SO DUMB of me!!!!!!!!!!!! 2 of my coworkers came out without me noticing and overheard some of it. I only noticed when I saw them heading back inside.

I came back in, sat down at my desk, and cried my eyes out. It’s a somewhat private cubicle in the corner of the office.

My manager stopped by and asked how things were going with the new project. I avoided eye contact, and could barely talk because I was scared I’d cry while answering. I told him it’s stressful, and he reminded me that I could ask him for help anytime.

I just feel so, so stupid and embarrassed about talking about my problems outside, and about crying at my desk... It was unprofessional and childish.

Please be kind and don’t rub my lack of good sense in my face. I know it was dumb.

If anyone has any advice on how to deal with painful emotions and being overtired at work, please share. And please share similar experiences, if you have any! Misery loves company...

cookiewriter

Wed, Sep 12 2018, 10:16 pm

Oyyyyy. I don’t have anything to say but hugs. What a rotten day. Tomorrow will be better iyh.

hodeez

Wed, Sep 12 2018, 10:16 pm

Sorry but why not make the call in the bathroom?

amother

Cyan

Wed, Sep 12 2018, 10:20 pm

I once cried in front of my boss. I’ve never seen someone so uncomfortable. He basically left the room.

thunderstorm

Wed, Sep 12 2018, 10:20 pm

I've cried more than once at work. As a matter of fact I cried at three different work places. One time I had a melt down in the boss's office and needed to call my DH to pick me up because I was such a mess.
I think it's totally ok to cry, even at work, even in front of co workers . They eventually forget and don't think any less of you. They may just be concerned and want to make sure you are ok.
Just walk into the office tomorrow as if nothing happened , with your head held high. You will be ok , I promise BTDT

oliveoil

Wed, Sep 12 2018, 10:27 pm

hodeez wrote:

Sorry but why not make the call in the bathroom?

In many workplaces the bathroom would be less private than outside.

Emotional

Wed, Sep 12 2018, 10:30 pm

hodeez wrote:

Sorry but why not make the call in the bathroom?

It's very easy to eavesdrop there, and OP wouldn't even realize anybody heard.

amother

Ginger

Wed, Sep 12 2018, 10:32 pm

Btdt. It’s happend to me a few times actually. I was once such a mess I had to go out and just cry it out vent to my husband before I was able to go back in and then of course burst out crying again the second anyone tried to say anything to me about anything or asked me anything. Don’t think into it. Tomorrow will b a normal day and you’ll see someone else have a meltdown a diff day. We all have our moments and sometimes the only thing to do is cry it out. I hope tomorow is a better day for u!

amother

Ivory

Wed, Sep 12 2018, 10:34 pm

I once got a gushing period at work with a massive stain on my skirt in front of two people. I survived. It will get better. Hugs. If you are close to the coworkers who heard you maybe you can go over to them privately and say you were having a bad day and didn't mean half of what you said.

Miri7

Wed, Sep 12 2018, 10:46 pm

We all have very-bad-no-good days sometimes. I'm sorry you had yours at work, that can be embarrassing.

Work hard on this new project, and then one day when you're feeling good, you can casually mention to your boss "hey, thanks for the support last week when I was having a really bad day. I'm glad to report that the project is going well and we're meeting all of the deadlines."

I find that it's more comfortable to acknowledge awkward moments with some grace, than to let them be that "we'll just pretend that didn't happen" type of awkward thing.

You WILL look back on this one day and laugh!

seeker

Thu, Sep 13 2018, 12:21 am

I did that a couple of times. You're a human being and everyone knows that. They are probably a little worried and not judging you at all. Give yourself the slack and compassion that you obviously need, and you will move on.

amother

Dodgerblue

Thu, Sep 13 2018, 2:08 am

If you work in my office, then you should know that we each have had our hard times too.
We 100% don't judge you or feel that you are any less. learning a new job is tough. hang in there. you'll come around.

rachelbg

Thu, Sep 13 2018, 6:50 am

You’re human, like everyone else at your office, and workplaces everywhere. It’s awful, but it happens.
I hope you have a better day today!
Hugs.

amother

Pewter

Thu, Sep 13 2018, 7:00 am

Wow! I didn't know others experience wat I do. I also have difficult family members with stress at work from nasty colleagues (like urs who "tattled" on u) and tight deadlines. I am extremely stressed from it all like u were and then my supervisor comes and Im so embarrassed. I can relate and just want to give my sympathy and tell u that I'm sorry it was so hard for u and that u were then further stressed by the embarrassing moment. I hope today is a better day.

amother

Emerald

Thu, Sep 13 2018, 7:13 am

Wow thought I was the only one this happened to! I remember being told from the manager in front of my supervisor that I was really horrible at what I did. I was going through a really complicated pregnancy at that time and was just proud of myself to attend work. I mentioned this to the supervisor multiple times. So hard to forgive! Bh im in a totally different profession and treated like a mentch!

amother

Burgundy

Thu, Sep 13 2018, 7:54 am

I have a male co-worker that yells at work. He just screams at people when the boss isn't around. It's horrible.

You vented. I'm assuming it's not your usual behavior and that you calmed down. Don't say anything to everyone, just move on. Everyone has a bad day. I walked out and went home early to nap when I was overwhelmed with work/home life. No one cared.

Cheiny

Thu, Sep 13 2018, 10:08 pm

amother wrote:

You’re being much too hard on yourself. You were overstressed and needed to vent and let off steam. You’re entitled. You can say something casual to your coworkers who overheard you like, “I’ve been going through a lot lately and had to vent. Vent I’ve now.” And then smile. Believe me, they’ll forget about it quickly.

chag334

Thu, Sep 13 2018, 10:22 pm

Normal

Didn’t read previous posts but I’ve also done this! Inexplicably and irrationally. It’s part of the territory. And it wasn’t “dumb”!!! U made a mistake. We all do. W have some compassion for yourself and learn from it. Smile