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Wedding advice NY asap!
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Leah613




 
 
    
 

Post Thu, Sep 20 2018, 6:31 pm
Sorry I didnt know what forum to put this in. mazaltov erev YK DD got engaged they want two months wedding so she is not a nervous kallah, go for it, (oh gosh with me working full time and chag etc ... but)
We Live iN LA. trying to see if we can pull off a beautiful but low budget wedding here, if its not more than 8k extra otherwise we will go to NY where chasan is. they dont want lakewood,
the halls package in monsey is not available and even if it was, not sure my daughter liked the pics oy what do I do, can u plz share with me other places in NY that give packages or at least catering and hall, how much, decent priced musician decent priced photographer etc and if it happens to be anyoen in LA is there reading this any advice to cut corners? I need to make decision asap and its almost yomtov thanks so much chag semeach
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thunderstorm




 
 
    
 

Post Thu, Sep 20 2018, 6:40 pm
I think the Viznitz hall in Boro Park does a package. And Mazal Tov!
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momwifedaughter




 
 
    
 

Post Thu, Sep 20 2018, 9:27 pm
U can try eden palace in Williamsburg. Ateres Golds in Boro Park. Ummm
. Mazel tov
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flowerpower




 
 
    
 

Post Thu, Sep 20 2018, 9:37 pm
Mazel tov!!! Ateres Rivka (in BP) has takana night once a week. Probably booked though but worth a try.
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Notsobusy




 
 
    
 

Post Thu, Sep 20 2018, 10:08 pm
I heard the new hall in Passaic does takana weddings. I don't know pricing or anything more about it.
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Leah613




 
 
    
 

Post Thu, Sep 20 2018, 11:33 pm
thanks all of u,. I am also finding out (BT many years) that not only do I pay the wonderful shadchan of course, DD wants 2 wigs, I heard that going price for chasan watch is 1500+ I have to buy her sheva brachas outfits etc she just wants to be "normal" but "normal" seems crazy expensive to me gosh they wanna go live in EY and learn a while like my BT husband said the watch would support them for a month there! anyone can advise me re the watch? his parent bougth her a beuatufl diamond bracelet they also dotnhave mioney but they are FFB and have married off severa so they knwo what they are doing. also all of you re these takan nigth sits fine by me but she is conserned it wont be normal flowers photographer etc she is a bit insecure and wants to be normal
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Leah613




 
 
    
 

Post Thu, Sep 20 2018, 11:33 pm
can u guys advise me of doignt he wedding hall and caterer prices and break down of other costs if I dotn do takana night
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vicki




 
 
    
 

Post Thu, Sep 20 2018, 11:47 pm
Leah613 wrote:
thanks all of u,. I am also finding out (BT many years) that not only do I pay the wonderful shadchan of course, DD wants 2 wigs, I heard that going price for chasan watch is 1500+ I have to buy her sheva brachas outfits etc she just wants to be "normal" but "normal" seems crazy expensive to me gosh they wanna go live in EY and learn a while like my BT husband said the watch would support them for a month there! anyone can advise me re the watch? his parent bougth her a beuatufl diamond bracelet they also dotnhave mioney but they are FFB and have married off severa so they knwo what they are doing. also all of you re these takan nigth sits fine by me but she is conserned it wont be normal flowers photographer etc she is a bit insecure and wants to be normal

Sit - or speak on the phone - with them sooner rather than later to get yourselves on the same page. If they don't have money either they may be sooo relieved to hear you ask to tone it down. No pearls, no mishnayos, no machzorim, no other high end gifts, no whatever else...
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Leah613




 
 
    
 

Post Fri, Sep 21 2018, 12:32 am
vicki wrote:
Sit - or speak on the phone - with them sooner rather than later to get yourselves on the same page. If they don't have money either they may be sooo relieved to hear you ask to tone it down. No pearls, no mishnayos, no machzorim, no other high end gifts, no whatever else...

haha im learning more customs as I read...
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EishesYo




 
 
    
 

Post Fri, Sep 21 2018, 12:32 am
Is Lakewood really a total nono?!
Even A lake terrace up scale wedding is cheaper than a brooklyn mediocre wedding

Neemas hachaim is a beautiful place with amazing affordable qnd gorgeous packages!!
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Leah613




 
 
    
 

Post Fri, Sep 21 2018, 12:33 am
EishesYo wrote:
Is Lakewood really a total nono?!
Even A lake terrace up scale wedding is cheaper than a brooklyn mediocre wedding

Neemas hachaim is a beautiful place with amazing affordable qnd gorgeous packages!!

they dont want everyone to drive so far his family lives even further away from there
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EishesYo




 
 
    
 

Post Fri, Sep 21 2018, 12:37 am
Leah613 wrote:
they dont want everyone to drive so far his family lives even further away from there


Its closer than LA!!
So back to Brooklyn, tiferes rifka is great pretty but booked in general the end of the jewish month in boro park is more available because many have the minhag not to make weddings then. Ateresgolda also nice call the halls to discuss they ate uses to this!!
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Leah613




 
 
    
 

Post Fri, Sep 21 2018, 12:51 am
EishesYo wrote:
Its closer than LA!!
So back to Brooklyn, tiferes rifka is great pretty but booked in general the end of the jewish month in boro park is more available because many have the minhag not to make weddings then. Ateresgolda also nice call the halls to discuss they ate uses to this!!

how far like if it was nov 28 (20 kislev) wd that be considered end of month
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Leah613




 
 
    
 

Post Fri, Sep 21 2018, 12:52 am
thansk and lila tov
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Rutabaga




 
 
    
 

Post Fri, Sep 21 2018, 2:40 am
Mazel tov!

I'm not at the wedding planning stage yet, but I wanted to say that NY covers an extremely large area and getting around can take a long time. Do you know where the chassan's family lives? Some places may be more convenient than others.

It sounds like you need to have a long conversation with your mechutanim about expectations and finances. Who will be paying for what aspects of the wedding and setting your children up? Who will be supporting them while they live in Israel? What gifts are considered standard? Just make sure that no one talks you into spending more than you can afford.

Also, if you're unfamiliar with both the area and the customs of making a "normal" wedding then maybe the chassan's family can do some of the legwork for you?
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youngatheart4




 
 
    
 

Post Fri, Sep 21 2018, 4:23 am
I am no expert but I have married off four children. The mechutanim varied tremendously economically. I saved myself a lot of headaches and aggravation by deciding on a budget in advance with my husband. Once we had an amount in mind I told them that this was our max budget for the wedding (did not include extras like sheitals, watch, candlesticks, bracelet or whatever) and anything desired over that amount would be on them. You need to give your daughter a reality check on finances and what you can afford. I think spending a fortune on "gifts" is insane when you can't really afford it and it is not teaching your daughter and future son-in-law the realities of life. Why not do the same thing for the extras? Tell your daughter how much you can spend in total and let her decide (with her chassan) what is most important. I also agree with the post above that you need to discuss how much you can afford to help with support in the future in advance and don't spend more than you can afford!
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SuperWify




 
 
    
 

Post Fri, Sep 21 2018, 4:59 am
EishesYo wrote:
Is Lakewood really a total nono?!
Even A lake terrace up scale wedding is cheaper than a brooklyn mediocre wedding

Neemas hachaim is a beautiful place with amazing affordable qnd gorgeous packages!!


This!!!

The Lakewood takanah halls are by far more beautiful and new and nicer and cheaper then the BP Monsey halls.
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ccgg




 
 
    
 

Post Fri, Sep 21 2018, 8:45 am
Take the pressure off!!
BT making first wedding long distance while working full time...two months is just too short, considering yomtov in between. The couple will survive and you don't have to be a shmatte, or get sick chas v'shalom!! Chosson can discuss with his rebbe and you can agree on a date that is realistic! Mazel tov!!
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octopus




 
 
    
 

Post Fri, Sep 21 2018, 8:56 am
Isnt there's tiferes Mordechai hall in bp that's also some nights takana? Beautiful hall, delish food
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thanks




 
 
    
 

Post Fri, Sep 21 2018, 9:01 am
We got a watch on Amazon for less than half. We gave a few choices, and returned the others.
We did that with cuff links too.
We could afford more, but we find it unnessacery for a young man to be wearing an expensive watch etc. Same for dil jewelry. It's just nuts.
My neighbor gave their dil a cz. He wants to learn for a few years. I think that's really great that everyone is ok with that.
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