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Is this normal for cleaning help to say?

 
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amother




Coffee


Post  Mon, Oct 08 2018, 11:07 am
I had a cleaning lady who was horrible but I couldn't get anyone else.
She was very slow and always on her phone. She never cleaned the sink drain of food and never cleaned behind the faucets. I would come and find pieces of food from her cleaning the pots still in the pots.
She stopped coming to me one day and my friend told me why
She said I don't respect her. She said that she asked me to get something for cleaning the stove and I kept saying I will get it and kept on forgetting.
She wanted me to get it to make her life easier but I told her that it was ok if the stove was not perfect I will do it.
I went to clean it and it was not hard at all without what she wanted me to get. Yes she needed to use elbow grease but that is what I pay her to do.
She said I respect g-d but not her.
Am I the not normal one or is it her?
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Squishy









  


Post  Mon, Oct 08 2018, 11:19 am
amother wrote:
I had a cleaning lady who was horrible but I couldn't get anyone else.
She was very slow and always on her phone. She never cleaned the sink drain of food and never cleaned behind the faucets. I would come and find pieces of food from her cleaning the pots still in the pots.
She stopped coming to me one day and my friend told me why
She said I don't respect her. She said that she asked me to get something for cleaning the stove and I kept saying I will get it and kept on forgetting.
She wanted me to get it to make her life easier but I told her that it was ok if the stove was not perfect I will do it.
I went to clean it and it was not hard at all without what she wanted me to get. Yes she needed to use elbow grease but that is what I pay her to do.
She said I respect g-d but not her.
Am I the not normal one or is it her?


You shouldn't have told her you would get something and then not follow through. It sounds like you run your house lax. I would be on top of her for the phone, the food crude, and the slow work. At the same time you need to compliment her and offer her a coffee, etc.

I don't think it was just not getting one cleaning product that made her feel unrespected.
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amother




Violet


Post  Mon, Oct 08 2018, 11:21 am
Obviously I don't know what else went on or how you spoke to her. But nothing based on what you shared shows lack of respect. If you told her you would buy her a cleaning product and never did, and maybe never intended too, that isn't the nicest. But other than that, she should do the chores you want her to focus on. She's your employee. You set the priorities, not her.
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ShishKabob









  


Post  Mon, Oct 08 2018, 11:24 am
It's normal for cleaning help to say this.
This does not necessarily reflect badly on you.
You should think about your interactions with her and see if maybe you said/did something wrong so that you can be better aware next time.
Wishing you very productive cleaning help with a pleasant personality and attitude.
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Cheiny









  


Post  Mon, Oct 08 2018, 11:30 am
amother wrote:
I had a cleaning lady who was horrible but I couldn't get anyone else.
She was very slow and always on her phone. She never cleaned the sink drain of food and never cleaned behind the faucets. I would come and find pieces of food from her cleaning the pots still in the pots.
She stopped coming to me one day and my friend told me why
She said I don't respect her. She said that she asked me to get something for cleaning the stove and I kept saying I will get it and kept on forgetting.
She wanted me to get it to make her life easier but I told her that it was ok if the stove was not perfect I will do it.
I went to clean it and it was not hard at all without what she wanted me to get. Yes she needed to use elbow grease but that is what I pay her to do.
She said I respect g-d but not her.
Am I the not normal one or is it her?


I don’t think that’s the issue. The issue is, why would you keep someone who’s so bad????
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Squishy









  


Post  Mon, Oct 08 2018, 11:40 am
Cheiny wrote:
I don’t think that’s the issue. The issue is, why would you keep someone who’s so bad????


She couldn't get anyone else.

I never hired someone who cleans to my standards, so I have to train them. Once you train them, you need to make sure you keep them.
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ora_43









  


Post  Mon, Oct 08 2018, 12:23 pm
Unless there's a lot more to the story, her reaction isn't normal.

To be fair, if you said you'd get the product but (intentionally) didn't, that wouldn't be nice. But it wouldn't be the kind of thing most people quit over.

Honestly, it sounds to me like the issue is that people who are bad at a job in some ways, tend to be bad at it in other ways, too. In this case - there aren't a whole lot of people who are terrible at housecleaning and yet consistently come on time, aren't resentful over the workload, and don't quit without warning. Someone who doesn't mind cleaning is probably also going to be at least decent at cleaning.

Again, all this assuming there was nothing else going on (her pay was within normal range, it wasn't too many hours or too much work, you always spoke to her respectfully, etc).
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amother




Peach


Post  Mon, Oct 08 2018, 1:03 pm
amother wrote:
I had a cleaning lady who was horrible but I couldn't get anyone else.
She was very slow and always on her phone. She never cleaned the sink drain of food and never cleaned behind the faucets. I would come and find pieces of food from her cleaning the pots still in the pots.
She stopped coming to me one day and my friend told me why
She said I don't respect her. She said that she asked me to get something for cleaning the stove and I kept saying I will get it and kept on forgetting.
She wanted me to get it to make her life easier but I told her that it was ok if the stove was not perfect I will do it.
I went to clean it and it was not hard at all without what she wanted me to get. Yes she needed to use elbow grease but that is what I pay her to do.
She said I respect g-d but not her.
Am I the not normal one or is it her?


Is 'normal' the new word for 'right'?

"it was not hard at all" vs "needed to use elbow grease"

If I had the option of working for two companies - one would give me a calculator and one would give me a paper and pencil.

I'd choose the one with the calculator. My job is to add together the numbers - that's what they pay me for. I'll take the job that helps me to it more efficiently, and pleasurably.
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shabbatiscoming









  


Post  Mon, Oct 08 2018, 3:22 pm
ShishKabob wrote:
It's normal for cleaning help to say this.
This does not necessarily reflect badly on you.
You should think about your interactions with her and see if maybe you said/did something wrong so that you can be better aware next time.
Wishing you very productive cleaning help with a pleasant personality and attitude.
Seriously? How in the world would you know this? Because you've met most cleaning help out there?
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dankbar









  


Post  Tue, Oct 09 2018, 11:58 am
If she dropped you from one minute to next wih lousy excuse....go check your drawers if she didnt steal anything
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ora_43









  


Post  Thu, Oct 11 2018, 5:22 am
amother wrote:
Is 'normal' the new word for 'right'?

"it was not hard at all" vs "needed to use elbow grease"

If I had the option of working for two companies - one would give me a calculator and one would give me a paper and pencil.

I'd choose the one with the calculator. My job is to add together the numbers - that's what they pay me for. I'll take the job that helps me to it more efficiently, and pleasurably.

I completely agree with this, but there's still a difference between not-great management, and disrespect.

I think most people have been in a situation at work where the company/boss has decided not to invest in equipment (or hiring, etc) that could make work better and easier. Sometimes their decision is a bad one. Still, it's well within the range of normal boss behavior (unless it's something outrageous like expecting someone to work without basic safety features). It's not like OP expected her to do the same job either way; she acknowledged that it would be harder without the stove cleaner and said she would accept a less than perfect job.

Quit for a better job? Sure. Quit and complain to others? Yeah, that too. Quit and complain that the boss disrespected you? Weird, and indicates a lack of understanding of the concept of being an employee.
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ora_43









  


Post  Thu, Oct 11 2018, 5:25 am
Just ftr I'm speaking as someone who's worked cleaning houses. IMHO people have the cleaning equipment they have. As long as it includes the basics (soap, mop, gloves) they're good. The only problem is if they expect perfect work with less-than-perfect supplies - which OP didn't.
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imasinger









  


Post  Thu, Oct 11 2018, 5:34 am
If I were in that situation, I'd be far more worried about having made a chillul Hashem than about whether she was correct to voice her feelings like that.

Since she's gone now, I'd say to myself, "we both made mistakes here. In the future, if I see someone do a shoddy, slow job, I'll ...."

Okay, ladies, help me fill in the blank.

"I'll leave them a written task list, and not pay that day until the job is done to my standards?"
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amother




Babypink


Post  Thu, Oct 11 2018, 6:07 am
doesn't sound like a good fit at all

hope you find someone better

that said, in general I do ask if someone wants or needs a product and get it

still, food left on pots and the rest of it? I doubt it was just the issue about the product which should not be crucial perhaps preferred.

id focus my energy on finding someone who cleans well and is happy to have the work
and I'm sure you will treat her well to keep her!
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ora_43









  


Post  Thu, Oct 11 2018, 7:45 am
imasinger wrote:
If I were in that situation, I'd be far more worried about having made a chillul Hashem than about whether she was correct to voice her feelings like that.

But OP only "made a chillul Hashem" if she actually did something wrong. If she was the one acting normally (her words), it's not a chillul Hashem just because the ex-employee thinks it was.

Quote:
Since she's gone now, I'd say to myself, "we both made mistakes here. In the future, if I see someone do a shoddy, slow job, I'll ...."

Okay, ladies, help me fill in the blank.

"I'll leave them a written task list, and not pay that day until the job is done to my standards?"

No. I would strongly recommend against this. Someone who did work deserves to get paid.

If they do a terrible job, pay them, and then terminate their employment. But don't withhold pay. That's almost never justified*. And "to my standards" leaves a lot of room for abuse.

Honestly, I don't see much OP could have done differently. She could have let the woman go earlier, but she decided that low-quality work was better than nothing. That's a valid decision. Just - this is one of the risks.

OK, I can think of one thing that could have been done differently. Don't tell an employee "OK, I'll get you that" when they ask for something, unless you're actually going to do it. If you aren't sure, tell them that you aren't sure you can do it and explain why. A simple "that's a reasonable request and I'll definitely try to do that, but I'm extremely busy at work and it might take a while" or "I keep forgetting to get that for you, I'm so sorry! I'll write myself a note" could save a lot of hard feelings.

(* the exceptions - one-time work like home repairs done extremely badly; damage to property through extreme carelessness. Even then, get legal advice first and ask a shaila).
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pesek zman









  


Post  Thu, Oct 11 2018, 8:12 am
This post reinforces my decision not to have cleaning help. This sounds so unnecessarily stressful!
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amother




Ecru


Post  Thu, Oct 11 2018, 8:41 am
When my cleaning lady asks for specific cleaning supplies I get them for her. She’s the one doing the cleaning. In my mind that is disrespectful to tell her you would get it and then not.
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amother




Coffee


Post  Thu, Oct 11 2018, 9:01 am
Op here

I just want to say that I told her one week that I forgot and the next week I went and bought it but it was the wrong size. It wasn't a cleaning supply it was an aluminum disposable drip pan for the stove. She doesn't feel like cleaning my stove so she feels this will lighten the work.
She also brought her own scrounging pad from home for my stove which I told her she can't use and she got angry. I give her everything I gave to my other cleaning ladies and it is what I use also when I clean.
I'm happy she is gone. My friend told me she didn't show up to her and my other friend told me she comes when she wants to and any time she feels like.
So now I hate having to look for someone new but I have no choice.
I would love to do it myself but I have no time.
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imasinger









  


Post  Thu, Oct 11 2018, 9:25 am
Oh, now I get it.

The line about "she cares more about respecting G-d than other people" was probably more about the scrounging pad than anything else. And what happened with the drip pan (forgetting once, then mistakenly getting the wrong size) is human and totally fine.

She sounds like bad news. I hope you find someone good very soon!
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