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Forum
-> Parenting our children
-> School age children
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amother
Emerald
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 Sun, Oct 28 2018, 1:26 pm
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For those of you that have kids that wear their payos behind their ears, I am wondering how big they are supposed to be. My son's are pretty huge and I am noticing that most yeshivish litvish people make their son's significantly thinner narrower. First of all, my son has a ton of hair. But also, I think I am being too machmir on where exactly I am supposed to leave the hair long, and his payos look messy. How wide are your son's payos compared to his ear, and how high up do they start from? You can measure with fingers. Thanks
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amother
Orange
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Sun, Oct 28 2018, 1:57 pm
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Machmir? My ds's don't have peyos behind the ear. Dh said that the halacha is that the hair reaches the bone that is adjacent to the top of the ear. Having long peyos behind the ear, or curly, etc. is like wearing a hat. A way to identify yourself as part of a particular group, but nothing to do with halacha
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ahuva06
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Sun, Oct 28 2018, 3:20 pm
| amother wrote: | | Machmir? My ds's don't have peyos behind the ear. Dh said that the halacha is that the hair reaches the bone that is adjacent to the top of the ear. Having long peyos behind the ear, or curly, etc. is like wearing a hat. A way to identify yourself as part of a particular group, but nothing to do with halacha |
Why did she get hugged? I'm pretty sure she's correct...
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amother
Jetblack
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Sun, Oct 28 2018, 3:56 pm
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I don't think there's a "supposed to." We are regular litvish/yeshivish, and my husband actually doesn't have peyos behind his ears. He has a trimmed beard. My 3 year old son does have peyos behind his ears - really just enough to tuck around. His hair is already straight and not so thick, but we do have his peyos trimmed and thinned by the barber. I don't think there's a right answer - just the look that you're comfortable with.
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Mommyg8
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Sun, Oct 28 2018, 4:03 pm
L'halacha the peyos just have to be half an inch, I think. That's all. So the long peyos look is a minhag. An important minhag to many, but a minhag nevertheless.
The "yeshivish look" is generally thin peyos that are even with the bottom of the earlobe when tucked behind the ear.
It happens that my father and dh never had peyos and they both have beards, though.
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sky
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Sun, Oct 28 2018, 5:06 pm
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While my boys don’t have it’s a pretty strong minhag for some. So it’s not correct to say it’s not necessary if it’s a true family minhag
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amother
Orange
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Sun, Oct 28 2018, 5:46 pm
| sky wrote: | | While my boys don’t have it’s a pretty strong minhag for some. So it’s not correct to say it’s not necessary if it’s a true family minhag |
Idk if this is a minhag or a way of self-identification, but even so, I've never heard of being machmir on a minhag
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Mommyg8
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Sun, Oct 28 2018, 5:48 pm
| amother wrote: | | Idk if this is a minhag or a way of self-identification, but even so, I've never heard of being machmir on a minhag |
מנהג ישראל דין הוא
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amother
Orange
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Sun, Oct 28 2018, 5:59 pm
| Mommyg8 wrote: | | מנהג ישראל דין הוא |
But a minhag is not the same thing as halacha
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