Does anyone really have a good life?

amother

Chocolate

Tue, Nov 27 2018, 10:01 am

I use to think that some people have it all. money, looks, shalom bayis, kids etc. but when I was sent so many nisayons at once. I started questioning if it can really be true that there are people out there with barely any problems. is it possible to have some peaceful quiet years in life or is it always going to be a struggle? is there people who are actually not suffering?

amother

Ruby

Tue, Nov 27 2018, 10:05 am

OP, you dont need to have it all to have a good life!! Trust me, NO ONE has it all. Life without ups and downs isnt called life. People may seem and think that they have it all and still be miserable and have a horrible life. Bh bh we have a good life! We have struggles but that doesnt make our life not good.

amother

Pumpkin

Tue, Nov 27 2018, 10:09 am

I struggle with this very much when I think about bringing another child into the world.
I’m very grateful for the much good in my life Baruch HaShem, but to bring new life into this works of suffering and unknown, I just have a hard time justifying it.
I’m always feeling bad when new babies are born (and I haven’t own babies).

mommyla

Tue, Nov 27 2018, 10:10 am

I have a good life. I also have challenges. They're not mutually exclusive. I believe that a lot of it is in your attitude.

amother

Mistyrose

Tue, Nov 27 2018, 10:39 am

But really why does it matter what others have? Why don’t you focus on yourself. You will be much happier

CHAYA R

Tue, Nov 27 2018, 11:54 am

I am always afraid to think...when will the moment come when all is c"v gonna come crashing down. Bh life is really good... im still young...I do thanks hashem every day for what I have. Or maybe its just a mindset and I am not the type to look at the negative. Maybe I am just in denial. Still figuring myself out...but I definately think that life could be a bed of roses. I think the previous generation was focusing a lot on the pain. I think this generation is more about the trying to see good in every situation..thanking hashem and so on. Is happiness based on circumstance or is it in the state of mind?

amother

Babypink

Tue, Nov 27 2018, 12:02 pm

CHAYA R wrote:

Both. challenges are part of life. The older you get the more challenges you have. Small children small problems, big children big problems.

dankbar

Tue, Nov 27 2018, 12:03 pm

Someone asked me " why the people that suffer, suffer endlessly with one challenge after the other & other people have bliss and no suffering? I said " Everyone has their struggles, some people's dirty laundry are in see thru bags & some in cloth bags"

Not everything that seems so glitzy from outside actually is. We are all but masks.

amother

Bisque

Tue, Nov 27 2018, 12:11 pm

My life was always a struggle full of heartaches and illnesses. I was wondering the about the same question that op has. I guess some people have a good life and I’m happy for them. But hashem gave me a challenging life.

amother

Plum

Tue, Nov 27 2018, 12:11 pm

My husband and I basically share a life. We share our financial struggles. We both come from disfunctional families. We are both broken hearted about the struggles our children face. I have health problems, but it ends up effects his life tremendously. We have secondary infertility. The list goes on... But he is an extreme optimist, and if you talked to him you would think our life is roses. If you would talk to me, you would probably run for the hills and thank hashem that you don't have my life.
Same life.
Different outlooks.
I wish I could be more like him.
I'm trying.

amother

Aqua

Tue, Nov 27 2018, 12:24 pm

I think if you gave the same life to 2 different people.. one might say it's a good life and the other will say it's bad.
It all comes down to your attitude. Are you a negative person? If you are.. you will always see the bad . As if it's highlighted. If you're a positive person you'll see the good. So that's why some people are happy and they're poor, have struggles.. and some are unhappy even though they have a loving family and lots of money.
I know a woman who has a wonderful husband, he adores her, they have kids, money... She's unhappy. Nothing is good enough for her, she complains all the time. Her kids don't want to visit anymore.. so she makes her own misery you see?

nomismommy

Tue, Nov 27 2018, 12:26 pm

amother

White

Tue, Nov 27 2018, 12:28 pm

If you cannot put food on the table, and your children are hungry, no amount of positive outlook will make that seem good.

Kiwi13

Tue, Nov 27 2018, 12:31 pm

A “good life” and an “easy life” aren’t the same thing. Many people have good lives. Not sure if anyone has it “easy,” though. Sometimes things are very, very hard and the focus just needs to be on getting through each moment one at a time. And then the sun comes back out, even if only long enough for you to catch your breath and renew your hope. And we keep moving forward a day at a time, because that’s all we can do.

I consider my life to be very, very good. But it is not without its struggles, and sometimes I feel knocked to the floor by the challenges. I posted last night on this site that I was looking for support. I had some crazy hard things happen over the weekend. Today is Tuesday and it’s a better day. Life is good. Not necessarily easy, but good.

amother

Plum

Tue, Nov 27 2018, 12:34 pm

amother wrote:

Me too.
I think this way too.
Seems almost cruel to bring a sweet neshama into this world of confusion and pain and suffering.
I surrender to hashem, and daven anyway for a child....we need moshiach.
Feeling beat up

amother

Cerulean

Tue, Nov 27 2018, 12:43 pm

amother wrote:

The older you get the more challenges you have. Small children small problems, big children big problems.

Can you help me see this?
I find the opposite is true for me.