Menorah size

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Post  Mon, Dec 03 2018, 11:24 pm
B'h my parents bought my (then chosson) husband a beautiful silver menorah. This was over a decade ago.
The menorah is not huge, but definitely not small. My husband is the most amazing person BH, but I can tell that he was/is disappointed that it's not bigger. He never brought it up, but every time he sees a picture of a friend's or sibling's menorah, he says "wow, he got a mechubadik menorah!". We are simple people, but I guess in our circles, people get bigger ones. I feel bad that he doesn't have a bigger one, but there really isn't much I can do. I really feel like I am being so shallow and vain, but every Chanukah I feel bad again... I guess I'm just venting
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Post  Tue, Dec 04 2018, 12:24 am
When I was newly married, I went with my bil to choose a menorah as a surprise for my husband. I wanted to buy a large, expensive one, but my bil convinced me that my husband would be happier if I saved money and bought him a smaller one. So I bought a smaller one that was more reasonable, and my husband is happy with it. Fast forward a year and bil gets married and my new sil buys him a big, fancy menorah (similar to the one he talked me out of buying for my husband).
Well my mil came over on Chanukah and sees my husband’s menorah and comments “it’s a pretty nice menorah - not as nice as bil’s menorah, but OK. . .”

She didn’t mean anything by it - it was just a thoughtless comment. Well it’s been 30+ years, and she is no longer alive, and the comment still rankles . . .

So I can relate . . .
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