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S/O making beds - bed makers happier than non- bed makers
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happyone









  


Post  Wed, Dec 05 2018, 10:31 pm
when the housekeeper makes the bed, im dedinitely happy.
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amother




Violet


Post  Wed, Dec 05 2018, 10:41 pm
amother wrote:
An awful lot of amothers here are making housekeeping out to be a mark of moral superiority. Get over yourselves. It’s the proverbial “good thing” but morally superior you.are.not.

FTR I happen to stand on the neater side of the equation, and occasionally suspect myself of having mild OCD traits. I’m the one straightening out the towels on the towel bar, multiple times a day, fir example, but unlike a lot of posters here, I don’t feel that that makes me a better person or a better parent or entitled to tell other people how to bring up their children.


On the other thread, it was the slobs that claimed moral superiority. They were the ones who claimed they had happier houses and they spoke less loshen hara. Unbelievable the stuff that was said.

The research shows which group has better lives.
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imasoftov









  


Post  Thu, Dec 06 2018, 3:14 am
amother wrote:
It really doesn't matter which one it is. I think it is correlation, but making the bed is a start to having a winning day. When you care about your environment, you care about other things.

"Bed makers are also more likely to like their jobs, own a home, exercise regularly, and feel well rested, whereas non-bed-makers hate their jobs, rent apartments, avoid the gym, and wake up tired."

I rather be on the side that is winning and happier.

What might matter would be research that showed that non-bed-makers become happier if they begin to make their beds. Which this is not.

Going to leave this brokedown palace,
On my hand and knees, I will roll, roll, roll.
Make myself a bed in the waterside,
In my time, I will roll, roll roll.
In a bed, in a bed, by the waterside I will lay my head.
Listen to the river sing sweet songs, to rock my soul.

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imasoftov









  


Post  Thu, Dec 06 2018, 3:18 am
amother wrote:
The research shows which group has better lives.

As Herodotus didn't say, Call no woman happy till she dies in bed.
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amother




Violet


Post  Thu, Dec 06 2018, 3:33 am
imasoftov wrote:
What might matter would be research that showed that non-bed-makers become happier if they begin to make their beds. Which this is not.



No one claimed the research showed that you become happier if you begin to make your bed. It appears that those that make their beds have their affairs more in order than those that don't contrary to the other thread. Dire consequences were predicted for the children of bed makers. My prediction is that children coming out of happier and financially together households tend to do better than those coming out of unhappier financially not together households.
The happier households are not necessarily rigid and unbending, nor are they the ones busy with what goes on in other households. It is the unhappier people who are jealous of that are concerned about what goes on in other households.
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amother




Floralwhite


Post  Thu, Dec 06 2018, 3:42 am
amother wrote:
It tells us that those who make their beds have a better life than those that don't.


Some days I make my bed. Some days I don’t. I don’t feel happier on days I do make it - it has no bearing on my mood! So do I have a better life on the days I make my bed than the other days? Of course not, that is silly! I would argue that the converse is sometimes true: on days I don’t make my bed I am probably busy doing something more interesting!
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amother




Floralwhite


Post  Thu, Dec 06 2018, 3:48 am
amother wrote:
That's it. Do they delude themselves that they own their own homes rather than rent? Are they deluding themselves that they exercise regularly?


Those are totally different scenarios. Finding money for rent each month is obviously more stressful vs owning your home outright.

Exercising regularly produces endorphins that help people feel happier, that’s a biological fact.

Making one’s bed really is not on the same scale but sure, I’ll buy into the idea that people think they are happier when they make their beds. Personally my mood is not affected at all by the state of my beds.
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amother




Floralwhite


Post  Thu, Dec 06 2018, 3:52 am
amother wrote:
On the other thread, it was the slobs that claimed moral superiority. They were the ones who claimed they had happier houses and they spoke less loshen hara. Unbelievable the stuff that was said.

The research shows which group has better lives.


It is not really nice that you are calling people “slobs” on a thread just because their levels of cleanliness don’t meet yours. Furthermore, it is a potential breech of site rules.

One piece of research doesn’t speak for all people across all situations.

And if it makes you feel better to believe that your life is “better” than non bed makers, enjoy your feelings of superiority.
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Ruchel









  


Post  Thu, Dec 06 2018, 5:45 am
I'd rather have my back be happy
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Iymnok









  


Post  Thu, Dec 06 2018, 6:07 am
My bed is sometimes made.
I am happiest when my hormones are behaving nicely. That has minimal, if any, connection to the status of my bed.
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Raisin









  


Post  Thu, Dec 06 2018, 6:16 am
I think it makes sense that naturally tidy people are happier then naturally messy people. There is not much that makes me happier then a clean and tidy house. Mess makes me feel overwhelmed and grumpy.
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sky









  


Post  Thu, Dec 06 2018, 8:03 am
amother wrote:
Curious if we're all meaning the same thing.

What exactly constitutes making the bed? When I use the phrase, I mean throwing the comforter over it, and pulling so there are no wrinkles. Takes exactly 2.7 seconds. Okay, I'm exaggerating. It takes 6 seconds. Maybe 5.

But reading this thread is making me wonder if others are doing something more labor intensive ??


It’s true it’s so quick. But typically I’m running out of my room carrying a baby still nursing and rushing many children to get ready and out and making a hot breakfast before they run out and then immediately start work for 7 hours with my baby. I don’t see my room again until the evening. (I think my work ethics are really good and I’m definitely not lazy)
My DH likes made beds so he’ll run around trying to make as many beds in the house as he can before leaving to work. So I try to make mine because I’m embarrassed I don’t and it really does take 7 seconds with one hand. I don’t even smooth it.

I was recently in a fancier linen store and the sales lady was telling me to buy fancy decorative pillows and I said “I’m lucky if I make the bed the throw pillows from when I got married are never in the right place”. She gave me such a putting look I felt really stupid.

eTa: I’m equally happy regardless of if the bed is made or not.


Last edited by sky on Thu, Dec 06 2018, 9:13 am; edited 1 time in total
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Harried mama









  


Post  Thu, Dec 06 2018, 8:12 am
Maybe it's the opposite? Maybe when I'm feeling happy, I have the emotional energy to make my bed, but when I'm unhappy, I just don't have the strength to do it? That would be an alternative explanation for the correlation.
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amother




Floralwhite


Post  Thu, Dec 06 2018, 8:45 am
Raisin wrote:
I think it makes sense that naturally tidy people are happier then naturally messy people. There is not much that makes me happier then a clean and tidy house. Mess makes me feel overwhelmed and grumpy.


But I know of some people who enjoy their mess and are therefore happiest when they have their stuff in a mess!

I am in between and how tidy my place is has no bearing on my mood.
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amother




Violet


Post  Thu, Dec 06 2018, 8:58 am
amother wrote:
Some days I make my bed. Some days I don’t. I don’t feel happier on days I do make it - it has no bearing on my mood! So do I have a better life on the days I make my bed than the other days? Of course not, that is silly! I would argue that the converse is sometimes true: on days I don’t make my bed I am probably busy doing something more interesting!


Again, the research is being misinterpreted. Also, ONE person's experience doesn't confirm or dispute the data. No one said that if you make your bed you will be happier that particular day.

There are certain characteristics happier successful people share in general and one of them is bed making.
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amother




Lime


Post  Thu, Dec 06 2018, 11:51 am
amother wrote:
It doesn't matter to whom? and for what?

People who have someone else to make their bed for them have something to be happy for.


We had full time live in, I regret my mom did not make an issue we do this minimum in a timely manner:

MAke your bed before going to school.
Scrape your plate in garbage and Take your plate to the sink.
Put that milk or juice back in fridge.
Hang up your used clothes if reusing or put in laundry hamper.
Well she did make a fuss on shabbes asking why our chair had a million things... that's not enough.

Even if you are bill Gates or a son to Donald Trump lehavdil, its a beautiful habit and you are doing your share besides for impressing everyone and you never know if you will afford the help your parents had weather full time or part time, and if you are a guest somewhere or staying at someones house for a while they might be using your room lets say for a computer, or come in for something in the closet and they will be annoyed if you keep your (their) room messy.
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amother




Aquamarine


Post  Thu, Dec 06 2018, 12:33 pm
amother wrote:
Again, the research is being misinterpreted. Also, ONE person's experience doesn't confirm or dispute the data. No one said that if you make your bed you will be happier that particular day.

There are certain characteristics happier successful people share in general and one of them is bed making.


Research? It was a survey.

From what you quoted - no mention of 'successful'.

In a survey of 68,000 people by Hunch.com, 59 percent of people don't make their beds. 27 percent do, while 12 percent pay a housekeeper to make it for them. Here's what disturbed me: 71 percent of bed makers consider themselves happy; while 62 percent of non-bed-makers admit to being unhappy.


first off - no stat here on the happiness for people who have their beds made for them as I read it.

What do we have?

From a likely self selected group of 68,000 people:

25,875 unhappy non-bed makers
14,245 happy non-bed makers
13,035 happy bed makers

5,325 unhappy bed makers.

Total: 58,478. Missing is the population whose beds are made for them. No comment on their happiness in what you posted.

So we have a statistically meaningless difference between the happy people in terms of bed making or not.

what is shows is if you find someone at a party who makes his bed, he is more likely to be happy then sad.

But if you go around the room and ask a person if they are happy, and they are, the chances that they made their bed are 41%. Its actually more likely that they didn't.
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Sleepymama









  


Post  Thu, Dec 06 2018, 4:16 pm
amother wrote:

One more thing: perhaps unhappy non bed makers are unhappy because they have to deal with annoying busy body bed makers harping on their life choices. Just a thought.


LOL! this really cracked me up!

My two cents:
I feel happier and more relaxed when the house is clean.
BUT-
if I used up all my energy getting everything clean and neat and I have no patience or energy left for the kids or my husband, then I feel UNhappy (to say the least).

Happiness=using your energy wisely.

Sometimes that means use your energy to create the serenity of a clean and functional home. Sometimes it means ignore the house and save your energy to be the kind and empathetic mother your children need.

I'm not a super woman. I can't do all the things and have all the energy. I have to choose wisely.
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amother




Violet


Post  Thu, Dec 06 2018, 4:25 pm
amother wrote:
Research? It was a survey.

From what you quoted - no mention of 'successful'.

In a survey of 68,000 people by Hunch.com, 59 percent of people don't make their beds. 27 percent do, while 12 percent pay a housekeeper to make it for them. Here's what disturbed me: 71 percent of bed makers consider themselves happy; while 62 percent of non-bed-makers admit to being unhappy.


first off - no stat here on the happiness for people who have their beds made for them that person, as I read it.

What do we have?

From a likely self selected group of 68,000 people:

25,875 unhappy non-bed makers
14,245 happy non-bed makers
13,035 happy bed makers

5,325 unhappy bed makers.

Total: 58,478. Missing is the population whose beds are made for them. No comment on their happiness in what you posted.

So we have a statistically meaningless difference between the happy people in terms of bed making or not.

what is shows is if you find someone at a party who makes his bed, he is more likely to be happy then sad.

But if you go around the room and ask a person if they are happy, and they are, the chances that they made their bed are 41%. Its actually more likely that they didn't.


You are making assumptions.
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amother




Floralwhite


Post  Thu, Dec 06 2018, 5:18 pm
Sleepymama wrote:
LOL! this really cracked me up!

My two cents:
I feel happier and more relaxed when the house is clean.
BUT-
if I used up all my energy getting everything clean and neat and I have no patience or energy left for the kids or my husband, then I feel UNhappy (to say the least).

Happiness=using your energy wisely.

Sometimes that means use your energy to create the serenity of a clean and functional home. Sometimes it means ignore the house and save your energy to be the kind and empathetic mother your children need.

I'm not a super woman. I can't do all the things and have all the energy. I have to choose wisely.


The above makes sense for sure!

Today I used my energy getting annoyed at these IMA threads so I just didn’t have the will left to make my bed. 🤣

Actually, I was about to make my bed when I saw all these pompous posts, reliance on a single statistically non-viable survey, name calling and superiority.

The result is today I take great glee in NOT making my bed. All I care about is when I go to sleep, I can snuggle with my DH who couldn’t care less if our bed is made as long as I am lying in it. Tongue Out LOL

Oh and if any of you call me, my DH or my kids a s*#b, I will report your post.

Good day.
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