Home
Log in / Sign Up
    Private Messages   Advanced Search   Rules   New User Guide   FAQ   Advertise   Contact Us  
Forum -> Relationships -> Simcha Section
Who pays for hotel for Shabbos Bar Mitzvah or Sheva Brochos?
1  2  3  Next



Post new topic   Reply to topic View latest: 24h 48h 72h

amother
Copper


 

Post Fri, Dec 21 2018, 11:38 am
If somebody makes a simcha in a hotel for shabbos who pays the hotel room? Also, when simcha is out of town who pays for hotel for the night?
Back to top

flowerpower




 
 
    
 

Post Fri, Dec 21 2018, 11:49 am
If you choose to make a simcha in a hotel and invite people then you should pay for their rooms. If others want to join the simcha although not really invited then they pay for their own room.

If someone is hosting an out of town simcha then she usually puts up her guests by neighbors and friends in the area.
Back to top

cm




 
 
    
 

Post Fri, Dec 21 2018, 11:49 am
In general (IME) the guest pays for his/her own accommodations. In special circumstances, it is appropriate for the host to pay (elderly low-income parent, for example).
Back to top

SixOfWands




 
 
    
 

Post Fri, Dec 21 2018, 11:51 am
amother wrote:
If somebody makes a simcha in a hotel for shabbos who pays the hotel room? Also, when simcha is out of town who pays for hotel for the night?


If the simcha is in a hotel, and people are expected to stay (ie, its Shabbat), the hosts pay.

If its in a hotel but you don't need to stay (eg, Sunday evening simcha using a hotel's facility), then you pay for yourself if you choose to stay.

If the simcha is "out of town" (ie, its not where you live), then you pay for your own accomodations.
Back to top

pesek zman




 
 
    
 

Post Fri, Dec 21 2018, 11:52 am
My parents BH did a hotel Shabbos sheva brachos for me. They made a guest list and paid for all the rooms. Even my husbands family and they generously allowed us to invite some friends too. I can’t imagine asking guests to pay for their own rooms
Back to top

amother
Gold


 

Post Fri, Dec 21 2018, 12:18 pm
If you make a shabbos simcha in a hotel, you cant invite people and demand they pay for their rooms, that's tacky. Although, my aunt made a shabbos sheva brachos at a hotel. She only invited grandparents, her siblings and siblings in law. Some of the married nieces wanted to go, so she said she's inviting the married but they have to pay for their rooms.
Back to top

amother
Cyan


 

Post Fri, Dec 21 2018, 12:19 pm
For sure the baal Simcha for a bar mitzvah/ Sheva brachos located at a hotel for shabbos. If the Simcha is not at the hotel, the baal Simcha should offer to provide a neighbor for you to stay at and if you are uncomfortable staying at others, you can pay for hotel room.
Back to top

amother
Copper


 

Post Fri, Dec 21 2018, 12:44 pm
Let me clarify the host is willing to pay for the food for shabbos. They just want the guests paying the rooms.
Back to top

sky




 
 
    
 

Post Fri, Dec 21 2018, 1:02 pm
If having oot of town guests or guests who live too far to walk it is the hosts responsibility to provide accommodations.

If the simcha is in a hotel the host is required to pay all expenses including accommodations. .
Back to top

amother
Gold


 

Post Fri, Dec 21 2018, 1:06 pm
Amother copper, if one is making a shabbos simcha at a hotel they should provide the food and rooms. If they cant afford it, they should not make the simcha at a hotel.
Back to top

amother
Cobalt


 

Post Fri, Dec 21 2018, 1:09 pm
amother wrote:
Let me clarify the host is willing to pay for the food for shabbos. They just want the guests paying the rooms.


the Simcha is not at the hotel if the host is 'willing to pay for food'..... for all smachot the guests don't pay for food (expect to the extent of helping to cook).

in anycase - if the parameters the host set up make it such that you can't attend. Send regrets.
Back to top

studying_torah




 
 
    
 

Post Fri, Dec 21 2018, 1:10 pm
What if the simcha is in Brooklyn, you live out of NY and don't have a place to stay for the shabbos simcha, nor do the hosts offer to find you a place to stay.
Then do you say ok I will stay in a hotel and pay for yourself?
Back to top

amother
Cobalt


 

Post Fri, Dec 21 2018, 1:11 pm
studying_torah wrote:
What if the simcha is in Brooklyn, you live out of NY and don't have a place to stay for the shabbos simcha, nor do the hosts offer to find you a place to stay.
Then do you say ok I will stay in a hotel and pay for yourself?


If you want to attend and have the means to do so.
Back to top

amother
Copper


 

Post Fri, Dec 21 2018, 1:13 pm
amother wrote:
the Simcha is not at the hotel if the host is 'willing to pay for food'..... for all smachot the guests don't pay for food (expect to the extent of helping to cook).

in anycase - if the parameters the host set up make it such that you can't attend. Send regrets.


The simcha will be in a hotel.
Back to top

studying_torah




 
 
    
 

Post Fri, Dec 21 2018, 1:15 pm
Cobalt- what I'd one doesn't have the means but as close family they're expected to attend?
Back to top

ra_mom




 
 
    
 

Post Fri, Dec 21 2018, 1:18 pm
amother wrote:
Let me clarify the host is willing to pay for the food for shabbos. They just want the guests paying the rooms.

Did the the hosts rent a party room at a hotel, and are using it as a simcha hall for the meals, but sleeping at home nearby? Are there people you can stay by neaby?
Or are they having a destination simcha and will be sleeping at the hotel for shabbos and expecting the guests they invited to pay their way for accommodations?
If it's the latter, just opt out. Very tacky.
Back to top

amother
Cobalt


 

Post Fri, Dec 21 2018, 1:19 pm
amother wrote:
The simcha will be in a hotel.


So what does it mean "willing to pay for food"?
Back to top

amother
Cobalt


 

Post Fri, Dec 21 2018, 1:21 pm
studying_torah wrote:
Cobalt- what I'd one doesn't have the means but as close family they're expected to attend?


family couldn't be all that "close" if there is no offer to find them somewhere to stay.

But its Brooklyn in your example - there are other avenues (other than from hosts) of getting Shabbos accommodation no?
Back to top

amother
Yellow


 

Post Fri, Dec 21 2018, 1:21 pm
The fact that someone can ask a question like this astounds me. If this sort of thing goes on, seems to me that classes need to be given on how to behave in a civilized society.
Back to top

amother
Cobalt


 

Post Fri, Dec 21 2018, 1:24 pm
amother wrote:
The fact that someone can ask a question like this astounds me. If this sort of thing goes on, seems to me that classes need to be given on how to behave in a civilized society.


really?

There are civilized society rules about hosting parties in hotels and accommodations?


or are you saying - its clearly not civilized to go on the internet, inquire how hosts should behave - and then report back to them that they are behaving badly.
Back to top
Page 1 of 3 1  2  3  Next Recent Topics




Post new topic   Reply to topic    Forum -> Relationships -> Simcha Section

Related Topics Replies Last Post
Ground meat from tomchei Shabbos looks different
by amother
1 Today at 1:44 am View last post
What's the latest you would go away for Shabbos if invited
by amother
24 Today at 12:55 am View last post
Baby girl shabbos stretchies/footies
by ThisMom
0 Yesterday at 11:43 pm View last post
Nice top for dropping in to a bar mitzvah
by amother
8 Yesterday at 9:57 pm View last post
Long shabbos
by amother
2 Yesterday at 9:25 pm View last post