Dd4 keeps coloring on floor/walls

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Forum -> Parenting our children -> Preschoolers

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amother

Maroon

Mon, Jan 07 2019, 7:55 pm

So my 4 year old loves coloring and is great at it. She recently learned how to spell her name and I keep finding it written literally all over the house. How do I get her to stop??

So far we’ve talked seriously about it after the fact. She apologized and said she won’t do it again. That clearly wasn’t effective.

We had her clean it, no change. (Totally unrelated, how do I get pen off of painted walls? Laugh

)

We tried saying no markers/crayons for x days. Still going on.

I told her tonight that there will be a consequence but I really don’t know what it will be. She recently picked a set of permanent markers as a prize, I’m thinking of taking those away permanently saying she’s not ready to use grown-up markers if she treats them wrong. But I’m not sure if this is the right route.

Please advise!!

lucky14

Mon, Jan 07 2019, 7:59 pm

Honestly I wouldn't let her have any kind of writing objects until this stops. And I'd make sure to put them all high up where she can't get them and be careful I don't leave any on the tables or whatever. Do you have other kids at home? I'd just do this for my own sanity. Not sure if it would be good for teaching her just no way would I want to have to keep cleaning that up.

simba

Mon, Jan 07 2019, 8:00 pm

I have beautiful drawings all over the walls of my house. My DS4 has really decorated nicely.
He knows he is not allowed to and tried not to.
Somehow the temptation is real.
Welcome to mommyhood.

Mon, Jan 07 2019, 8:03 pm

Advice: stop going with the no's and don't's. Start working with the yeses and it's okays. Give her plain paper, toooons, and say "here! Write as much as you want." Give her construction paper, memo pads, etc. Anything that is okay to write on.

amother

Lilac

Mon, Jan 07 2019, 8:05 pm

My mom made one wall of the playroom into a white board, all coloring went on there.
I got a roll of painters paper and I lay it out on the floor about 10 feet long, the kids love it.
When my kids used to write on the wall I would hide all writing/coloring supplies for a while and make them clean it up.

amother

Jetblack

Mon, Jan 07 2019, 8:09 pm

tf wrote:

My 4yo has had unlimited access to tons of papers, pens, markers, crayons, tape, scissor, glue, etc for at least half a year already. She recently started a stage where she colors on anything that pops into her head. It's so frustrating, and definitely not because she lacks better options. I think it's just the combination of enjoying coloring, plus experimenting with different surfaces that are forbidden.

DVOM

Mon, Jan 07 2019, 8:09 pm

simba wrote:

I have beautiful drawings all over the walls of my house. My DS4 has really decorated nicely.
He knows he is not allowed to and tried not to.
Somehow the temptation is real.
Welcome to mommyhood.

I love your empathy for his struggle!

I have very artistic children. I love this quality in them. Unfortunately, it's not a trait that encourages cleanliness.

I have told my 3 and 6-year-olds that if I don't see the damage, they can color wherever they want. They color on the floor and walls with Crayola washable markers and a box of baby wipes next to them. They color, wipe, repeat. It may be unusual, but this really doesn't bother me.

I would not allow the permanent makers though. Any art material that cannot clean up is used very sparingly or not at all. For example, my boys love to paint with acrylics. We reserve this activity for the summertime. They are allowed to paint outside and only in their bathing suits. They swim in paint-splattered bathing suits, but this has been a good way for us to contain this mess.

Mon, Jan 07 2019, 8:18 pm

amother wrote:

I guess this kid needs to feel what it is like without for a while before she can get it back.😥
OP didn't say anything about trying options so for that kid giving ok options is a better choice.
חנוך לנער על פי "דרכו"

amother

Babypink

Mon, Jan 07 2019, 8:52 pm

amother wrote:

The consequence for not being able to resist coloring the walls when given markers - is not being given markers. (if you are looking for a consequence).

Another approach is the 'we have a problem' - 'you seem to love coloring on walls' and 'I find it hard to clean up, and I don't want to do it, and I don't think you should spend too much time cleaning walls either'..... What ideas can we come up with.

(this by the way is straight from 'how to talk to kids...' book. The solution suggested was a big roll of butcher paper).

amother

Maroon

Mon, Jan 07 2019, 9:29 pm

tf wrote:

Seriously think I haven’t tried that?!?
We keep the printer paper at her height and she takes freely. I always offer her construction paper. She has appropriated every notebook in the house, even old checkbooks (with permission). Whenever she asks for a printed coloring page I always say yes (except for extreme circumstances obviously!). We’ve given her envelopes and sent pictures in the mail to cousins, she’s decorated big cardboard boxes, clothing tags, drawing pads, coloring books...the list goes on!

With my particular daughter, if there is a reward chart she will follow it perfectly until it’s finished, receive the prize, and go right back to the negative behavior. She is not the impulsive type, she is bH responsible and intelligent for a 4 year old, and really understands what she is doing after the fact (don’t worry, she has other struggles). I’ve tried problem solving with her for other situations but she has a very hard time with it and when we come up with an idea together it never yet was successful. I’m not against trying though! I will speak to her tomorrow.

I have a nice art kit in the closet which I’ve been saving for a rainy day, I’m happy to use it as a reward of some sort but I just don’t know how to get the behavior to stick.

I’ve tried taking away the markers and crayons for 1-3 days but the issue is that it’s also punishing my 3 yr old then which I dislike, and she will do this with a pen she finds on the counter or in the couch pillows, etc.

I’m just trying to figure out how best to proceed...

Mon, Jan 07 2019, 9:35 pm

Sorry, Maroon, if I offended you. I know many many parents who don't yet know of it, and your original post didn't mention any of those, thus my suggestion. I don't know you so there's no way of knowing...
It's only a suggestion. Either you take it or you don't. And either way, all is fine.

amother

Maroon

Mon, Jan 07 2019, 9:46 pm

tf wrote:

Sorry I wasn’t trying to come across as harsh! I’m frustrated/exasperated with the situation (it should be the worst, I know!) and trying to figure out how to handle it correctly. I really shouldn’t have responded to our post alone because it seems to be directed at you specifically then. Sorry for jumping on what you said.

I’m going to read through all the suggestions again and see if I can implement some...just nothing specifically stood out as new. But there are ideas that I haven’t tried in this specific situation so maybe it will play out differently. Any other ideas are also welcome!

amother

Jetblack

Mon, Jan 07 2019, 9:51 pm

I totally get it. My DD isn't even doing it with markers, she's using pens that we have everywhere.

amother

Blonde

Mon, Jan 07 2019, 10:24 pm

I love the washable Crayola markers and baby wipes idea upthread. If all else fails, that seems like a great way to go.

amother

Powderblue

Mon, Jan 07 2019, 10:38 pm

No way would I give a preschooler permanent markers!!!
Even if she didn't doodle all over the house, it can get on the table and her clothes.
I would definitely change that prize as a consequence.
(I wouldn't offer it again until she's ten and only if you have no younger kids!)

ectomorph

Mon, Jan 07 2019, 10:38 pm

I have several preschoolers and I only allow washable crayons in the house. any other writing equipment is kept hidden.
It's the only thing that comes off easily after a long time and from anything.

ectomorph

Mon, Jan 07 2019, 10:39 pm

Just so you know washable markers aren't washable after a few days they leave a faint stain on my white paint

amother

Maroon

Mon, Jan 07 2019, 10:58 pm

amother wrote:

I know not our smartest move Banging head

But she only uses those by the table with a double paper and a parent watching. Our wall and floor coloring troubles are with washable markers, crayons, and pen. I’m finding it impossible to remove the pen marks!

amother

Ivory

Mon, Jan 07 2019, 11:17 pm

lucky14 wrote:

id go with this.
Weirdly enough even as an adult, when I have a pen in my hand the compulsion to doodle on anything within reach is almost not controlable. Obviously as an adult I have a level of self control but I do scribble alot and I think that keeping writting material out of reach is the only practical real option.

anon coz this craze of mine is embarrasing

funmother

Mon, Jan 07 2019, 11:18 pm

Curious till what age is normal my dd is older and has done it twice within the past 6 months. When she was four she scribbled a lot. When she does it what changed was. we cleaned it as soon as possible when she wasn't looking and kept any eye on her when she colored. Without saying I was punishing her I would switch to non writing activity like a cut and paste collage, beads and again without mention the walls we told her her magic doodle was for during the week and all other projects like the ones listed above was for weekends

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