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Good teenagers being disrespectful

 
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amother




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Post  Sun, Jan 13 2019, 3:15 pm
My 2 teenage girls between the age of 14-16 years have 2 issues:

A) they are good girls and can be very helpful and sweet but can have moments where they have utter disrespect to us parents. Or they just don't have the patience for us which results in them talking chutzpah or just doing these annoyed facial expressions.
They talk nicer to their friends then us parents.

B) their relationship between each other is also very strained. One has social and emotional issues. And the other one has become as much as I love her, snobbish.
I have to say 70% of their connection is a shouting match and not getting along. The emotional ones wants their connection and the other one hasn't got the patience for her.
For her, her friends count more then the family.

My girls have got a good name outside the home , And they are really good girls but these two issues are still happening at home.

Any advice?
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oneofakind




 
 
 


Post  Sun, Jan 13 2019, 3:22 pm
Your kids sound very normal. You can gently correct chutzpa to your face by providing the right tone/words but keep your orders very short.
The needy one should have outside help to deal with her social/emotional issues. You can nicely ask the other one to be a little more patient with her but unless she's outright mean, she just doesn't have what it takes now to deal with her right now.
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amother




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Post  Sun, Jan 13 2019, 3:30 pm
Yes my daughter does get some help. And I do get my other one because her whole life she had to always be more careful with her sister because she gets offended so quickly.

We did once ask a psychologist about their relationship and his answer was, just because they are sisters doesn't mean they have to become friends. I get where he is coming from but as parents you do want them to get along.

But I need advice how I can smooth it over for them. And how I can get them to stop talking to us parents like we don't know anything.
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oneofakind




 
 
 


Post  Sun, Jan 13 2019, 3:43 pm
Is there a project they would both be interested in doing together that both would enjoy? A chesed, crafts, course?
You can't force things...it may even backfire.
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