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Questions I've had about the frum world
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lora




 
 
    
 

Post Thu, Jan 24 2019, 9:05 pm
dogs take up so much time! I would in theory love to have one but how would I keep my full time job and cook dinners, take care of my baby, and still have some me time?
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hillary




 
 
    
 

Post Thu, Jan 24 2019, 9:43 pm
We had quilts inside quiltcovers. We called it bedding.
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lucky14




 
 
    
 

Post Thu, Jan 24 2019, 10:24 pm
thunderstorm wrote:
My mother is a BT my father is a convert. My inlaws are both converts. They all refer to the last meal of the day as "supper".



The members of my family who are BT and converts also call it supper. I call it dinner. I wonder if it has to do with what part of the country you grew up? Do different parts of the country call it different things?
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dee's mommy




 
 
    
 

Post Thu, Jan 24 2019, 10:47 pm
1) why do we call it "supper" when the rest of the universe calls it "dinner"?
2) same question, but saying "linen" instead of "sheets"
3)why do we sleep with duvet covers and not a quilt+top sheet?
4) why is it so uncommon to have a dog?

1) I didn't grow up frum, but we called it supper
2) I don't really remember ever calling it linen
3) My parents use duvets, but I on the other hand have banned them from my house. I always just called it a blanket and sheet.
4) I don't know the answer to this one. I grew up with dogs, but since I knew the work involved in taking care of them, especially the puppy stage, I didn't take on dogs or any other pets in my own home.
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imorethanamother




 
 
    
 

Post Thu, Jan 24 2019, 11:47 pm
Dogs are actually quite expensive. Between the vets and the shots and all their medical expenses that don’t fall under insurance, and the fact that you can’t just “put down” a dog if they get sick, the financial issue is the time and energy to take care of them (they’re like bored children, who never get toilet trained), is what deters me from getting a dog.

The people I know with dogs have money and time.
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pause




 
 
    
 

Post Thu, Jan 24 2019, 11:51 pm
All this talk of supper vs. dinner makes me think of "The Last Supper" which was the final meal. Makes sense to call the final meal of the day supper.

I'm not terrified of dogs but I don't trust them. Many people in my community are terrified.
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pistachio88




 
 
    
 

Post Fri, Jan 25 2019, 12:20 am
1.) Most people I know say dinner but some say supper s
2.) I use linen and bedding interchangeably
3.) My parents are from Europe I never used sheets. When I first tried sheets instead of a duvet as an adult I didn't like it. Probably why I say linen or bedding instead of sheets (no sheets)
4.) Fear of dogs I think it comes from the Holocaust at least in most people I know.
What
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Chana Miriam S




 
 
    
 

Post Fri, Jan 25 2019, 12:44 am
Edited because double

Last edited by Chana Miriam S on Fri, Jan 25 2019, 1:09 am; edited 1 time in total
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thepickled




 
 
    
 

Post Fri, Jan 25 2019, 12:44 am
In my community dogs are considered spiritually impure, like all non-kosher animals. We wouldn’t intentionally bring that into the home and care for it like a loved one.
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Chana Miriam S




 
 
    
 

Post Fri, Jan 25 2019, 1:05 am
andrea levy wrote:
Where I live, supper is not a frumthing. My friends from Anglo backgrounds tend to say this. I say dinner. I’m also from a family that the earkiest family came to Canada in 1880 and the last one who wasn’t born here, came in 1905. If that makes a difference.

I say sheets and in my shul whatsapp, where ppl often give stuff away, sheets are what they are called. Linen is a catch all phrase

I did not grow up frum and we used duvet covers.

I am allergic to dogs
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Iymnok




 
 
    
 

Post Fri, Jan 25 2019, 2:00 am
1- Lunch is the midday meal.
Supper is the evening meal.
The main meal is called dinner. It can refer to either. In the US usually supper is the main meal, thus often called dinner.

2- Linen is the non-clothing textiles, bedding, towels, tablecloths, napkins, etc.

3- duvet/comforter/blanket/quilt with a cover versus a set of sheets and a comforter is a personal choice.
A fitted sheet+cover may be easier for busy homes. Making the bed is way easier.

4- a dog would make a huge difference for my son. But we have other kids and limited space and resources. I’m sure many feel the same way.
We have a turtle.
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salt




 
 
    
 

Post Fri, Jan 25 2019, 2:26 am
I always thought supper was a British word and dinner American.
I've never heard American's say supper, I've only heard them make fun of my accent and say "suppah".
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shabbatiscoming




 
 
    
 

Post Fri, Jan 25 2019, 2:52 am
imorethanamother wrote:
Dogs are actually quite expensive. Between the vets and the shots and all their medical expenses that don’t fall under insurance, and the fact that you can’t just “put down” a dog if they get sick, the financial issue is the time and energy to take care of them (they’re like bored children, who never get toilet trained), is what deters me from getting a dog.

The people I know with dogs have money and time.
Its so interesting that you say its expensive. I dont see that at all. We adopted a dog from a shelter about two years ago. Yes, we paid for an initial vet visit and shots, but it was well under 1000 shekels (I am in Israel) and when she needs a shot, yearly or sometimes longer periods of time, its not such a big expense at all.
And other than that, what does she cost? A BIG bag of food every three or four months that costs 250 shekels. Its pennies. And no, we do not have time or money just lying around. But getting a dog was THE best thing we ever did for our family.
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shabbatiscoming




 
 
    
 

Post Fri, Jan 25 2019, 3:06 am
MiriFr wrote:
If anyone has answers, I am dying to know.

Feel free to add to this post!
I'll start.
1) why do we call it "supper" when the rest of the universe calls it "dinner"?
2) same question, but saying "linen" instead of "sheets"
3)why do we sleep with duvet covers and not a quilt+top sheet?
4) why is it so uncommon to have a dog?


1. I think its a new york thing that people call it supper, not a frum jewish thing.
2. we said sheets growing up.
3. the top sheet thing is for sure a personal preference, but an over all frum jewish thing.
4. where I live everyone and their brother have dogs, and its lovely Smile
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WitchKitty




 
 
    
 

Post Fri, Jan 25 2019, 3:35 am
MiriFr wrote:
4) why is it so uncommon to have a dog?

I would think that the reason is that the gemara (bava kamma) says לא יגדל אדם את הכלב אלא אם כן קשור בשלשלת
and probably some people decided to delete the last part and just leave the לא יגדל אדם את הכלב...

I would love if it was okay for chareidim to have a dog. I would get one immediately

pause wrote:
All this talk of supper vs. dinner makes me think of "The Last Supper" which was the final meal.

That's what I'm thinking of, just the opposite- that would make certain parts of 'the rest of the universe' have an aversion to the word supper.
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marina




 
 
    
 

Post Fri, Jan 25 2019, 8:44 am
These are the questions you have about the frum world? Hahahahaha
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essie14




 
 
    
 

Post Fri, Jan 25 2019, 9:10 am
WitchKitty wrote:

I would love if it was okay for chareidim to have a dog. I would get one immediately .

if you’re not chareidi enough to not have the Internet, you can have a dog Very Happy
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zaq




 
 
    
 

Post Fri, Jan 25 2019, 10:09 am
None of the things you posted , except the dog, have anything to do with being frum. There are both regional and class variations in speech and usage, and you may be equating “New York metro area” with “frum world.”

“Linens” is a more general term than “sheets” as it includes pillowcases, towels, bath mats, blanket covers and other fabric items used for bed and bath.

It may also be a bit of a tzniut/refinement/prudery (take your pick) thing. “Sheets” cannot be anything but bed-related, and beds imply s@x. “Linens” can be as innocuous as dishtowels and tablecloths.

Frum people seldom own dogs because it is a “thing” not to own tref animals unless they work for a living. IOW a horse or donkey is ok if he pulls your wagon or plow; a cat is ok if it keeps mice out of your home or granary. A dog is ok if he herds your cattle or scares off burglars, but not ok as stam a pet.
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dancingqueen




 
 
    
 

Post Fri, Jan 25 2019, 10:11 am
Your questions are about the culture of the specific frum community you chose.
1. I don’t know anyone who calls the evening meal supper. Everyone I know says dinner.
2. We would say sheets
3. I don’t know what a duvet is really. So it’s a fitted sheet for your blanket? That actually sounds really annoying to change. We do sheets and blankets.
4. I know lots of people with dogs in my community. I would never have a dog because I inherited the Jewish fear of dogs. (It’s not just a holocaust things, my family bH left Europe before but the Cossacks would also torture Jews with dogs).
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mommy3b2c




 
 
    
 

Post Fri, Jan 25 2019, 10:54 am
The duvet one was already answered. It’s because most Ashkenazi Jews are European and only here for a couple of generations and duvets are a European thing.

I call a sheet a sheet and a whole set of linen, linen.

I love dogs but I have no interest in caring for them, so I don’t have one.
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