Do you dress your kids at night for the next day?

amother

Ruby

Fri, Feb 08 2019, 9:26 am

shabbatiscoming wrote:

Im sorry, if you dont do this then how would you know what other's clothing look like?

And no, they do not look all wrinkled and a mess, not at all.

And why is it not something good to get used to? What could remotely be wrong with it?

Because we see our own kids in the morning in their pajamas they look wrinkled.

TwinsMommy

Fri, Feb 08 2019, 9:34 am

I've never done that.

BUT---- my daughter often likes to fall asleep in her clothes from the day. I don't make my kids wear pajamas every night if they'd rather wear sweatshirts or their clothing or whatever. My son always does wear pajamas though.

But the next morning she changes.

I only have 2 kids so getting them out the door in the morning isn't so harried. Wake them at 6:15--- potty, get dressed, shoes, lunch in backpack, meds, breakfast, ready at 7:00. These days his van comes at 7 and her bus comes at 7:15.

They're 12 year old twins so they dress themselves. But back in the days where I dressed them, it just didn't take that long since there's only 2 of them and back then school started later.

I don't think it's the worst idea I've ever heard.

amother

Mistyrose

Fri, Feb 08 2019, 9:47 am

my sister in Israel does this. Her 6 year old son gave such a fuss about getting dressed in the morning. it took forever to dress him and he was always late to school that she gets him dressed at night for the next day (school starts earlier in Israel at 8, my kids start at 9)

I have another friend in Israel with 9 kids the oldest is like 12. I said how do you do it? she said I dress them at night for the next day no pajamas

I think it's more an Israel thing. Not so common in America where I live.

amother

Wine

Fri, Feb 08 2019, 10:00 am

amother wrote:

I dont get my kids dressed the night before but almost every night they sleep in their clothes from the day. Leggings and a tshirt or sweatshirt. We do morning baths and changing into pjs is just another step and creates more laundry . I only use pjs on shabbos or if their clothes from the day are dirty . I never thought about it to much until reading this thread but I love sleeping in clothes and maybe that's why I dont mind when my kids do. Shells and hard tail skirts are more comfortable than any night shirt or sweats in my book!

I honestly can't tell if you're being facetious. If you're serious, I apologize, but it's hard to imagine someone finding day clothing comfortable for sleeping.

Metukah

Fri, Feb 08 2019, 11:08 am

amother wrote:

my sister in Israel does this. Her 6 year old son gave such a fuss about getting dressed in the morning. it took forever to dress him and he was always missing late to school that she gets him dressed at night for the next day (school starts earlier in Israel at 8, my kids start at 9)

I have another friend in Israel with 9 kids the oldest is like 12. I said how do you do it? she said I dress them at night for the next day no pajamas

I think it's more an Israel thing. Not so common in America where I live.

Is your sister Israeli? Your friend Israeli? I thought not.

I come from an Israeli family, dh is Israeli and I have never in all my life come across anyone who does that.

All the Israelis I know would be revolted by the idea.

Sorry OP I try not to be judgmental but IMHO, dressing children at night for the morning, stinks of dysfunction.

amother

Natural

Fri, Feb 08 2019, 11:13 am

You are not supposed to wear clothes you sleep in- it causes forgetfulness (not sure where this is bought down but it is definitely a real kabbala thing)
Also it is so uncomfortable! I can’t believe people actually do this. Imagine sleeping in stiff pants instead of cotton pajamas. And let’s say a kid drools in their sleep etc.
very dysfunctional!!! I would get more help in the morning or cut back my hours. This is not a normal thing to do at all
Except maybe a baby in a stretchie
You want your kids to grow up not
Knowing that they should wear pajamas?

amother

Saddlebrown

Fri, Feb 08 2019, 11:19 am

amother wrote:

My parents did this with me and my siblings when I was a kid. I HATED IT. I am a very sensory person. Part of life as a sensory person is being as comfortable as possible, as often as possible. I feel resentful of my parents not understanding my needs as a kid when I couldnt even express it. Nowadays I only buy clothing that is very soft, and by 5 pm I am in my favorite pajamas.
You can make lunches and have breakfast ready to go the night before
you can put the kids to bed earlier so they wake up earlier
you can teach the kids to be more independent in the morning routine
You can hire a girl to help you get out of the house in the am
but no sleeping in clothing!!

OP here,
I tried reaching my kids to be more independent. They are just more delayed than the average child. My oldest one was getting dressed by that age all on her own. They also fight with me and run away when I try to dress them.
My kids think it's the biggest treat to sleep in their clothing.

shabbatiscoming

Sun, Feb 10 2019, 3:27 am

Metukah wrote:

First of all, no it does not stink of dysfunction (and yes, that is being judgmental, not sure how you think its not) it smells of parents trying to figure out better morning routines.
Secondly, the first time I ever saw this, dressing a child in their clothing the night before, was about 35 years ago when we were visiting extremely israeli cousins (sabras through and through). The father told us that they did this so that their mornings ran smoother.
So, I dont think its either israeli or anglo, but israelis definitely do do this as well.

amother

Orange

Sun, Feb 10 2019, 3:31 am

Having tried this with my kids, they sleep better in PJs so that's what they do, but I often sleep in clothes. Nothing dysfunctional about it, UNLESS they do in fact look rumpled and disheveled in the morning, or are sweaty and gross.

Seriously, do what works for you. If nobody can tell that they slept in their clothes, then you are doing great. Leave the judgmental folk out of this, unless they are volunteering to come and help you out in the mornings.

amother

Pewter

Sun, Feb 10 2019, 3:43 am

I fall asleep in my clothes sometimes and I wake up feeling gross. Granted, a bra and tights and shell and slip and skirt and sweater are not as comfy as loose fitting pajamas. I'll usually wake up in the middle of the night, get into PJs and go right back to sleep far more comfortably. If I manage to sleep the whole night in my clothing then it all goes straight into the hamper in the morning.

I can understand doing this with babies or toddlers who basically wear the same thing night or day and who obviously can't dress themselves, although that won't really work if they tend to have leaky diapers. I can't envision making school aged kids wear their clothing to bed because there is no way that proper school clothing is as comfortable as pajamas. Uniforms especially tend to be stiff and scratchy and would look rumpled if slept in.

amother

Blush

Sun, Feb 10 2019, 4:00 am

amother wrote:

I was just going to say that you're not supposed to sleep in clothing or shoes- but I wasn't sure if it was halacha or minhag and what the reasons are.

amother

Yellow

Sun, Feb 10 2019, 4:17 am

How about the opposite? On shabbos day my younger kids sometimes like to stay in pyjamas for the day. I occasionally let them, if we're not going out.

They enjoy not having to get dressed once in a while..

Last week a friend came by in the afternoon and she seemed horrified to see my kids in pyjamas.

myname1

Sun, Feb 10 2019, 4:49 am

amother wrote:

My preschooler also likes to stay in her pjs when she can, especially on Shabbos. I think my MIL was horrified...

Metukah

Sun, Feb 10 2019, 4:59 am

shabbatiscoming wrote:

I never said I wasn't being judgemental. I said I try not to be. In this case I wasn't very successful.

I didn't say Israeli's don't do it, I said it's not an Israeli thing.

I personally still think it is dysfunctional. I try to make my mornings easier, so I prepare the schoolbags the night before with snacks and drinks, I prepare dh's lunch and my son's if applicable. I put out all the kids clothes so there is no scerfuffle and stress in the morning. I shower the kids at night so they are already wearing clean underwear. How long does it take to put on a shirt, skirt/jumper, tights and sweater? If that is too much for the morning, then the problem lies there and not in the desire to dress the kids the night before.

(as an aside, growing up, I also always knew that there was a halachic/kabbilistic issue with wearing clothes that were slept in. I don't know any details...)

ra_mom

Sun, Feb 10 2019, 5:48 am

amother wrote:

I love staying in PJs when I can. It's the rare occasion that I get to do so, but it's awesome. There's nothing like lounging around in loungewear.

amother

Apricot

Sun, Feb 10 2019, 10:12 am

Please do it if it will make you calmer and more loving in the morning. As long as the clothes are comfortable (leggings, sweatpants, sweatshirts) to sleep in, they will not look rumpled in the morning with freshly brushed and styled hair. Older kids with uniforms or thicker pants, tzitzis, etc can be taught to lay out their clothes before bed and get dressed themselves.

Another tip that helps me with my sensory six year old who always has a different complaint or tantrum about some article of clothing: dress him in his bed while he is still groggy and waking up! Works like a charm, and when he's fully awake he just enjoys hugs and kisses and runs down to breakfast happy to have "avoided" the annoyance of dressing!

sky

Sun, Feb 10 2019, 2:07 pm

baby12x wrote:

Bad idea to sleep in tights. Can cause infection etc. You should encourage them not to

.

Ive heard this many times but always wondered if it’s one of those things mothers tell their kids or medically advised to the public who have no existing issues?

It is very common to sleep in leggings and I think cotton tights breath more then leggings so I’m trying to figure out why tights are the issue.

I think many people are thinking of adult clothing. Sleeping in a pencil skirt and blouse is uncomfortable. A pair of leggings and a t shirt or sweatshirt is not. I’m thinking it would be more common to do this with toddlers who can wear comfy clothes.

I sometimes fall asleep for the night while nursing in tights, slinky skirt and a shell and hoodie - my clothing - and don’t find it uncomfortable at all. (However I always change when I awake)

amother

Slategray

Sun, Feb 10 2019, 3:39 pm

sky wrote:

Feet are specifically prone to fungal infections, not specifically legs (for most people). I would also worry about vaginal yeast infections for girls if they constantly wear multiple layers that are closely fitting in that region.