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Pros and cons of feeding kids a lot of information
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amother




Cyan


Post  Mon, Feb 11 2019, 12:05 pm
amother wrote:
Not OP but also wondering
So in other words you all agree that feeding too much information to little kids is not damaging? It’s not too much for their little brains to hold?
As long as its knowledge in nature and not yentish of course.
I was unsure about this because my 4 yr old seems to know a lot because he is around adults all day (only child) and just talks facts related to science and geography like a 9 year old. And yes he knows the name of the school he will iyh he going to. He also knows that Hashem watches over our future babies and you don’t pick them up from the hospital... (he just a wants to understands how baby gets from Hashem to mommy’s hands) People always give me the stares when he starts talking.


What does the bolded mean exactly? How can a child be given "too much" knowledge? What's too much? Doesn't Judaism value knowledge and thinking?

I'm wondering if your child is perhaps lacking social skills? Or does he know how to relate to people in a variety of ways aside from sharing his knowledge? Just asking because maybe that's why people are staring.
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Ravenclaw




 
 
 


Post  Mon, Feb 11 2019, 1:47 pm
Brains grow, neurons form according to how much information you put in , not the other way around.
(Am bad at biology, so neurobiologists, feel free to correct me, but that’s how I understood it)
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sequoia




 
 
 


Post  Mon, Feb 11 2019, 1:54 pm
When I was three I said, “mom, it’s not fair, right now you and dad are going to read books and enjoy yourselves, and I won’t!”
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amother




Coffee


Post  Mon, Feb 11 2019, 2:11 pm
amother wrote:
Not OP but also wondering
So in other words you all agree that feeding too much information to little kids is not damaging? It’s not too much for their little brains to hold?
As long as its knowledge in nature and not yentish of course.
I was unsure about this because my 4 yr old seems to know a lot because he is around adults all day (only child) and just talks facts related to science and geography like a 9 year old. And yes he knows the name of the school he will iyh he going to. He also knows that Hashem watches over our future babies and you don’t pick them up from the hospital... (he just a wants to understands how baby gets from Hashem to mommy’s hands) People always give me the stares when he starts talking.


I don’t think there’s anything wrong with sharing age appropriate knowledge with a child! Some kids are naturally very curious. My 6 year old is very smart and curious. She soaks up information like a sponge. I try to answer all of her questions on her level.

Sometimes one of my children asks a question, and while I’m answering I can see their brain tuning out...that’s when I know I’ve gone past their understanding and stop right there.
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SixOfWands




 
 
 


Post  Mon, Feb 11 2019, 2:21 pm
amother wrote:
I spent shabbos with a relative this past week and I noticed she feeds her kids an insane amount of information. Almost unnecessary information. Examples would be - she got a new wig, her 10 and 8 year told daughter know what brand it is, what the words highlighting, lowlighting and ashy mean. Her kids know my tenants names and they ask me how are the kleins? She talks to them a ton and anything kosher is up for discussion .
I'm not like this at all. My mom wasn't like this. I didn't know the terms "brand name" "designer" until 9th grade 🤦‍♀️🤦‍♀️ and I wasnt in hs 30 years ago. I'm only in my 20s!!! There was a certain innocence to my childhood and I'm happy I didn't know a lot ... but am I handicapping my daughter by being like my mom? This relative asked my 4 year old daughter- which school are u going to next year, will you have a uniform, how does it look / what color is it? Will u take a bus? Will u have school lunches ? I was watching my daughter while this was happening and she was just sitting there with her mouth hanging open. She maybe had an answer for 1 out of every 10 questions being thrown her way . Funny thing is this relative loves children and I think she thought she was just being cute and friendly but I felt so bad for my child I just wanted to tear her away from the conversation ...


A 10 year old and an 8 year old are approaching the age where fashion will be important to them, if it isn't already. Understanding highlights and low lights just makes sense.

Knowing your tenants' names is kind of like knowing your own neighbors' names.

As to the questions about your child's school next year ... every 4 year old I've ever met is very excited about what school they're going to next year, and loves talking about it. Its not "yentish." its giving your child a chance to speak about things that she's interested in and excited about. I guess your child isn't interested or excited, but that doesn't change the fact that most are.
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Rachel Shira




 
 
 


Post  Mon, Feb 11 2019, 3:33 pm
I guess I just don’t understand the idea that there is such a thing as too much knowledge for a child. Yes there is stuff that’s not their business, or however you want to phrase it. But things that affect them - like details about their school, uniform, lunch, new sibling, Shabbos plans - I personally think that knowing those things only empowers a child and gives them a sense of ownership over their lives. Kids need to know about the structure of their lives and those little things matter.
I’m a preschool teacher and I love when a kid comes in and says “I have pasta in my lunchbox today!” or “My mommy said I’m leaving before naptime with my sister.” I think the fact that their parents gave them that information and the fact that I believe them (obviously I double check important things) teaches them to take a little responsibility for their daily lives.
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dancingqueen




 
 
 


Post  Mon, Feb 11 2019, 4:42 pm
I’m not a “none of your business” kind of mom. I feel like that’s kind of old school. Most of the things you mentioned I would talk to my young kids about if they asked, except for money related stuff that I find tacky.
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allthingsblue




 
 
 


Post  Mon, Feb 11 2019, 4:47 pm
How do you know she told her kids this info, and they didn't pick it up from her talking to her sisters, mother and neighbors?
Also, the questions that she asked your 4 year old- it would be very normal for the 4 yr old to know the answer to most of those questions. With things relating to my children, ie going to a new school or getting a new sibling, I give them plenty of advance notice and many parents do.
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amother




Peach


Post  Mon, Feb 11 2019, 6:12 pm
My 5 year old daughter had a friend over on shabbos and I told the friend that she had such a pretty shabbos dress. The friend replied, it's from Zara's.

My kids have no idea what brand their clothing is or about any financial matters - how much we make, pay in rent etc.

I have no problem answering their questions about math, science, geography...as long as I know the answers, of course.
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SixOfWands




 
 
 


Post  Mon, Feb 11 2019, 6:19 pm
amother wrote:
My 5 year old daughter had a friend over on shabbos and I told the friend that she had such a pretty shabbos dress. The friend replied, it's from Zara's.

My kids have no idea what brand their clothing is or about any financial matters - how much we make, pay in rent etc.

I have no problem answering their questions about math, science, geography...as long as I know the answers, of course.


Presumably the child is capable of reading the label, or went shopping to purchase the dress.

Why make these trivial things into major issues. When I was a kid, I knew that most of my dresses came from Betty Lynn, because that's where we shopped. I'd have to be a dolt not to know that. And one of my boys would only wear 2 particular brand of pants -- and you'd better bet that he knew what they were.

Who cares?

Your children's ignorance as to where you shop doesn't make you a good mother. It doesn't make you a bad one either.

Why do people need to bring down others' parenting? Does it make them feel better about themselves?
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amother




Jade


Post  Mon, Feb 11 2019, 7:44 pm
I'm OP. No this thread was NOT to bring down others parenting, rather to get an answer to the original question, what are the pros and cons of feeding kids a lot of information.
Just because it's not my style to share a lot and I might even bug out from kids who talk like adults that doesnt mean that there is anything wrong with it and some kids are thirsty for information and their parents will deal with them as they see fit. For now my kids aren't asking and I am not offering because I just domt see what there is to gain for me and my child
You should do as you see fit for yours
Thanks everyone for the input !!
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