Small yerusha - the dilemma

amother

Babyblue

Sun, Feb 24 2019, 7:28 am

We are a young couple + 2 DC under 3. I'm the sole breadwinner work with a low pay and DH is studying and sometimes does unpaid internship. We have absolutely no savings. The situation is tight.

Anyway! I just received a small "yerusha" from a relative (5000$).
We already used 2300$ because we were 2 months late with the rent (bh our landlords are kind people) and also to buy groceries etc. because due to some problems we started this month with the bank account already in the red...

Now the dilemma is what to do with the rest of the money.

On one side, I think we should put it aside because we have literally not a dollar of savings and our situation is really not stable...
My DH thinks it's better to invest it in something concrete rather than in a savings account, like buying something and selling it on Amazon. He says those things are more lucrative but I'm just scared to loose all this money.

And then another option would be to be finally able to buy me a new sheitel (cheap like for 600$ max), new shoes because the ones I have are not really great, a new bed for our eldest, a wardrobe because we currently live with racks etc.

Please no bashing. My life is so far from the one I've imagined. Bh I'm so blessed but on some aspects it gets so hard... Any positive advice?

baby12x

Sun, Feb 24 2019, 7:30 am

3-6 month of expenses in savings before you even consider investing money!

baby12x

Sun, Feb 24 2019, 7:32 am

Read this post and blog to help you get started getting your finances in order.
https://adimesaved.com/basic-g.....nance

mommy3b2c

Sun, Feb 24 2019, 7:34 am

I think your husbands idea is not very smart. You can buy something to sell on amazon and not sell even one piece. I think you should put aside $1500 in case of emergency and use the rest for the shaitel, shoes, bed and wardrobe. Your husband should also find a part time job such as tutoring or telemarketing to bring in some extra money. Do you have a car? He should drive for uber or lyft. That can bring in $35 an hour or even more.

amother

Yellow

Sun, Feb 24 2019, 7:53 am

From what you're describing, you need to use the money to pay your bills the next few months. You hadn't paid rent in awhile? Forget the yerusha for a moment. Do you expect to be able to meet your expenses and fully pay your bills the next few months? If not, the money has to be a available for regular monthly bills needed to live. Hatslacha.

FranticFrummie

Sun, Feb 24 2019, 7:56 am

baby12x wrote:

3-6 month of expenses in savings before you even consider investing money!

Speaking as a person who is currently 2 months behind in rent, I cannot recommend this enough. You absolutely must have security first and foremost. A new sheitel won't help you sleep better at night.

Shoes that support your feet and are easy to walk in are important. I always believe in buying good quality walking shoes.

Mattresses can go a lot longer than you think. If it's saggy, put several layers of cardboard between the mattress and box springs.

A good sheitelmacher can help fix the color, and maybe update the cut on the one you already have.

Please tell DH that the Amazon, Etsy, and other selling sites have already played out. They are pretty much taken over by Chinese wholesalers. Ebay is very hit and miss, and you have to have pretty special stuff to even hit your minimum bid. You might get lucky and have a bidding war, but I wouldn't count on it.

DH needs to start taking on students to tutor after school. It's the best strategy.

Ruchel

Sun, Feb 24 2019, 8:23 am

That's a good yerusha in the frum world unless maybe except a parent.

amother

Saddlebrown

Sun, Feb 24 2019, 8:57 am

Put away as much as u can and use the rest towards necessities. Don't even think of investing it. It's not enough money to go very far and u seem to really need it for a day to day basis.

33055

Sun, Feb 24 2019, 8:57 am

How long is it until DH completes his degree and starts earning?

amother

Cyan

Sun, Feb 24 2019, 9:07 am

It sounds like you're headed toward more debt. How much longer until dh starts earning some money? What's the plan until then? I would absolutely not spend this money on anything non essential until you're earning enough between the two of you to already get through the month. Buying and selling is a verrrry risky investment for beginners. Absolutely nothing is guaranteed or even close to it. Someone like you should stay far away from that right now. In summary, you'll get the most bang for your buck by using it to stay out of debt.

amother

Gray

Sun, Feb 24 2019, 10:06 am

OMG Please don't buy to sell on Amazon.

My nephew did that and his mother now has a bunch of junk of which he sold maybe a few pieces. There are smooth talking people out there who can convince that they're gonna sell the next big thing... and its not.

Purple2

Sun, Feb 24 2019, 10:17 am

This might not be as practical, but op, treat yourself to the shaitel.
Sometimes in life a treat like that can keep you going through the tough times. It will make you happy and you will remember the person who passed away whenever you wear it and feel good about yourself. It will be an Aliya for their neshama as well.
The rest, do put into savings as it seems you will need it until you’re more stable financially.

Wife1

Sun, Feb 24 2019, 10:38 am

I rule I was told about investing is ONLY INVEST WHAT YOU CAN AFFORD TO LOSE best advise ever!

amother

Green

Sun, Feb 24 2019, 11:38 am

How about pay the next 2 months rent in advance so you don't have to worry about it and have yishuv hadas?

mom!

Sun, Feb 24 2019, 11:47 am

What a difficult decision! I can't tell what to you do and I am happy not to be in your position. What I can tell you, as the wife of an amazon seller, that it is NOT AT ALL what its cranked out to be. Especially your first few listings. You need to do a ton of paid advertising, by far more what you can imagine. My husband was told by many "on your first couple of products, be happy if you break even." Haztlacha!

CatLady

Sun, Feb 24 2019, 12:18 pm

My opinion: You need a sense of security at this stage, which is a great use of an inheritance because your loved one would want you to feel safe and secure. If it were me, I'd go to Costco, stock up on as many staple items as possible. I always feel good when I have food stocked up.

The rest should go into your savings account. DH should be tutoring and/or driving Uber as a side hustle and staying away from Amazon unless he's selling his old textbooks.

In the meantime, make sure to maximize every purchase (Ebates, cash-back credit cards, etc.) Things will start to look better soon!

amother

Scarlet

Sun, Feb 24 2019, 12:23 pm

Please NO AMAZON.
Amazon will undercut you, it's very hard to sell.
As my sibling who tries Amazon says, "I hope we'll sell our sechoirah and break even by the end of the year..."
This sibling is NOT doing well financially, and amazon is his sde job now for 6 years.
They are budgeting so much That they don't eat standard shabbos food bc they can't afford it. Sad

DVOM

Sun, Feb 24 2019, 2:07 pm

amother wrote:

Here is my advice, for what it's worth, from one frugal wife-of-a-college-student to another:

It is so so so tempting to spend any extra money that comes in on 'fun stuff': a wig, new furniture, new shoes. For me, the temptation is new toys and art supplies. I can remember thinking, the rent got paid (or not paid) somehow up until now... why should I sink all this fabulous cash into something as mundane and boring and unexciting as rent?? I really feel for you, my dear. On the surface, there really is no dilemma. If it's a question between paying for necessities (rent) and luxuries (wig, furniture), of course, necessities win. I know, it is really hard to go for many years without the things that make life interesting, exciting and joyful. We can survive on beans, rice, and water, but what a sad, colorless existence!! But the most responsible course, in my view, is paying for the things we need before the things we wish we could have.

So I would take 2,500 dollars and hand it to my landlord, and thank god for giving me the means to pay my bills with a bit more peace of mind for the next few months. I would take the last 200$ and visit a Habitat for Humanity Restore Store and a second-hand clothing store in a wealthy neighborhood (Lakewood NJ has the fabulous Serendipity. Shoes are 3-5$ a pair). 200$ should be able to buy a wardrobe and a new bed with a bit left over for shoes.
There are things that are not worth buying cheap; I think a wig is one of them. Cheap wigs look.... cheap. Give the one you've got a good wash in the bathtub tonight and see if you can figure out a new way to style it (braids? half up? change the part?) that will give you a new look for nothing. Plan on a new wig being your 'graduation' present when you're husband makes his first paycheck post-college.

Speaking of husbands and paychecks, there may be creative ways for your husband to bring in some extra cash around his college schedule. Mine drives for uber, fixes watches, and fills in for a caterer. Every dollar counts!

Chin up, girl! You can do this!

amother

Babyblue

Sun, Feb 24 2019, 6:12 pm

Thank you so much to everyone who replied! I read everything and it was so goodbye to be finally able to feel heard about this stuff because no one knows about it and we keep well the appearance.

Okay, Amazon is a categoric no, I'm happy you are all on board with me on this topic!

For the rest I have to say when "stuff" doesn't happen we are managing paycheck to paycheck so bzh the next bills will be paid on time.

About my DH working, it's a bit of an issue, we live in a place where finding a job is hard (but rent is cheap). We don't have a car and he has already done some tutoring but it doesn't always work out. Bzh after Pessach or on September he'll be able to find a proper job in his field.

Thanks to your advice, I think we are going to put most of the money on a savings account and use a bit for necessities.

thanks again for all your advice!

amother

Babyblue

Sun, Feb 24 2019, 6:15 pm

CatLady wrote:

My opinion: You need a sense of security at this stage, which is a great use of an inheritance because your loved one would want you to feel safe and secure..

Thank you so much for this words. I needed to hear this.