Is this something I am supposed to be doing?

DrMom

Tue, Feb 26 2019, 8:56 am

amother wrote:

I don't understand mothers who choose to have kids and then they don't look after their children's needs. Something as basic as hair removal she shouldn't have to work for to be able to do.

Removing facial and eyebrow hair is a "basic need?"
People should not reproduce unless they are prepared to remove their daughters' eyebrows?

LOL

Clothing
Food
Shelter
A Torah education
Good midot
Eyebrow hair removal

^^^^ Which one of these things doesn't belong?

Fabulous

Tue, Feb 26 2019, 9:29 am

amother wrote:

To all posters saying that it's not a need what would you do if your 14 yr old has a unibrow and she doesn't like it?

there is also something known as a tweezer. I know someone who is dark and a bit hairy and she never waxes. She only tweezes and she is more than presentable. She is actually quite girly and into her looks and she doesn't like what waxing does to her skin and the expense.

amother

Brown

Tue, Feb 26 2019, 9:33 am

Chayalle wrote:

I did laser for my eyebrows and upper lip in my 30's, and I was B"H quite successful with that. But will note that I have never been pg since I did the laser.

My daughter did it as well, and it has all grown back. She has not been successful with it.

Our experience is that laser for teens is a waste of money. They are still hormonal, growing, etc...so the hairs just grow back.

Stick to waxing.

In terms of paying, my girls pay for their own waxing using babysitting money. I occasionally treat them, like before a Y"T.

I would say stick to electrolysis for the face. I've done it and do it now for my daughter and it works very well. Laser isn't recommended for the face!

amother

Babypink

Tue, Feb 26 2019, 10:00 am

I did electrolysis for upper lip in my late teens and 20s. I had a lot, so it took a while to get rid of completely. I still have a few stray hairs that I tweeze. I also have scarring so my skin is white above my lip. So I don't think electrolysis is a perfect answer for the face either. Never tried laser... Waxing still makes me swell and break out in hives, I try it every now and then hoping that it will work. Waxing also forces you to wait till it grows in before you can wax again, so there is always an "ugly" period, which more permanent forms of hair removal don't require, so I don't think waxing is such a great option either....

singleagain

Tue, Feb 26 2019, 10:01 am

I have sensitive skin and waxing and threading and plucking often hurt me, but I like my eyebrows to look neat. Another option since I'm also scared if laser and electrolysis is something like this

Panasonic Facial Hair Trimmer for Women ES2113PC, with Pivoting Head and Eyebrow Trimmer Attachments, Dry Use, Battery-Operated https://www.amazon.com/dp/B000.....EE440

Especially to help me between waxes, which I have become less sensitive to over time.

amother

Coral

Tue, Feb 26 2019, 11:42 am

amother wrote:

You can also just tweeze eyebrows every week or so - it's not so much hair to deal with

I was just going to post this. Is it really so rare to tweeze eyebrows instead of waxing them? I've been tweezing for about 20 years, and I got 1 waxing before my wedding which I hated!!! I never plan on getting another one, I can take care of myself, thank you very much!!

Metukah

Tue, Feb 26 2019, 12:18 pm

amother wrote:

Arms and legs may be negotiable, but anyone who considers mustache hair removal for a self conscious teen a luxury is really out of touch with the needs connected to raising a teenager.

Doesn't have to be laser though.....

If she indeed has a mustache! So many teenagers today think they know what they need. I was the same as a teenager. My mother, sisters and I have very little, light body hair. I do my eyebrows once a year, and it's only a little shaping, I have no mustache hair to talk of, even hair removal on other body parts I only do every few months and even then my beautician tells me it's too early. So I'll be the first to honestly say that I don't understand enough. My 7 year old daughter has dark hair on her legs and I plan to get her started on waxing as soon as it is age appropriate, so I'm sure if she had mustache hair I would get that dealt with as well.

But, and this is a big but, I still don't think parents have to pay for it. If parents are struggling and the teenager can make some money to cover these things, as long as the parents are supportive, it's not so bad. When I was a teenager my parents struggled (that's what it seemed to me anyway), so I babysat and paid for camp, waxing, makeup etc..

orchidee

Tue, Feb 26 2019, 12:29 pm

I remember being resentful that my mom made me pay for all the stuff myself that all my friends seemed to be getting easily. That makes it feel to the teen like a need that isn't being met. OTOH, I wouldn't want my daughter (who isn't anywhere near a teen yet!) to expect me to pay for all the stuff she "needs", even if the financing isn't an issue. I believe that it's a fine balance between the two...

FranticFrummie

Tue, Feb 26 2019, 12:31 pm

I made it a point to be absolutely neutral about DD's choices. I never gave an opinion one way or another, and let her decide. She has sensitive skin, so didn't want to do anything painful. She cut her leg once while shaving, and decided that light colored hair doesn't need to be removed. LOL

Her body, her choice. She also knows that if she were really distressed about something, we would research until we decided what was the right choice for her. B'H, she is very confident with her "less than perfect" body. She'll never be a runway model, and she's just fine with that.

Tue, Feb 26 2019, 12:33 pm

Mother should not impose her standards of beauty on her child and insist on medically unnecessary procedures.

Mother should be empathetic and take her child's concerns seriously, helping her explore options for personal care and consulting with a physician as appropriate. It is best to avoid high-risk or permanent interventions until the child is able to make an adult decision with a more mature understanding of risks and benefits.

As for "who pays," why should there be a standard? Families can work this out for themselves.

amother

Brunette

Tue, Feb 26 2019, 1:11 pm

I am an oddity, but I have zero leg hair to speak of, and only sparse hair on other body parts too.

I doubt all of my children will be similarly blessed. How am I supposed to teach them about shaving, waxing, tweezing what have you when I myself have no earthly clue about how it's done? (Okay, some clue, but very little practical advice.)

And I would in theory pay for laser/electrolysis of a mustache on a girl, but I'd wait until the technology progresses enough that it is actually permanent.

amother

Salmon

Tue, Feb 26 2019, 1:16 pm

I tweeze my own eyebrows, and when I was a teen my mom taught me to bleach my upper lip. That’s still what I do. I did laser but the hair grew back for the most part since I’ve been pregnant several times since. Very cheap and easy.

gamanit

Tue, Feb 26 2019, 3:35 pm

amother wrote:

Many teens botch their eyebrows when they try tweezing themselves. I wouldn't recommend it.

I've heard of far more botch ups with waxing as tweezing only removes one hair or max 3 at a time. I know of more than one girl who had terrible waxing jobs done. At least they were able to blame someone else for it I guess? I always tweezed my eyebrows. I have yet to go for a waxing for them or any other hair removal treatment. I don't trust anyone else to do it. You can tell your teens to follow the rule I set for myself when I first started; I limit myself to removing ten hairs from each eyebrow per session. If I feel like it looks bushy I'll pull out my tweezers again the next day and continue. This way I do it very carefully. I have dark hair btw.

Raisin

Tue, Feb 26 2019, 5:49 pm

this is great for removing lip hair. (other facial hair too but I don't have that bh)

https://www.tweezerman.com/smo......html

I would pay for a teenager to remove facial hair if she wanted it. None of my my girls have wanted to so I am not forcing them. I don't believe waxing body hair is necessary for young girls. Maybe in the summer before camp but not the rest of the year.

amother

Firebrick

Tue, Feb 26 2019, 6:37 pm

amother wrote:

You can also just tweeze eyebrows every week or so - it's not so much hair to deal with

Lucky you. There are women in my family who are mortified by a three day yuntif because they tweeze (wax sensitivity, cant thread) and they have noticable unibrow stubble.

This is not a one size fits all!!