not managing financially

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Forum -> Household Management -> Finances

Not managing financially

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View latest: 24h 48h 72h

amother

Tangerine

Tue, Mar 05 2019, 10:40 am

I'm earning more than I ever did and managing worse than I ever did. Ok, dh's pay did take a cut this year and we're feeling it and he keeps trying to get more hours. But we're just not managing! Here is our current financial status:

1. a little more in bank than needed to cover last month rent check, which we finally paid on Friday, along with tzedakah check to cover the rest as we simply didn't have the whole amount needed, and this is with small HUD payment.
2. checks written out for day camp and clothing will need to be held off until next payment.
3. a few thousand dollars owed to local grocery, which will only able to be paid when receive tzedakah assistance closer to YT.
4. a few thousand dollars owed to school for tuition, which bothers me more than anything as so badly want to pay.
5. a few thousand dollars owed to credit card.
6. a few hundred dollars owed to tutor.
7. wearing same 3 sweaters day in day out received at beginning of winter with same skirt every day.
8. new sheitel needed, can't afford even the simplest, never mind the cut.
9. a few thousand dollars of dental work needed with no way of paying
10. and the list goes on

Need I say more? I'm working full time for many years without ever breathing, way harder than anyone I know, yet struggle so hard. Where are we going wrong? Should I stop working and just go on govt assistance? Perhaps we will manage better that way. Seriously, how does everyone else do it??????

amother

Tangerine

Tue, Mar 05 2019, 10:42 am

forgot to add, didn't start shopping for Purim, not costumes or Shalach manos bec simply don't have the money. I tried gemachs for costumes and didn't find and trying to convince children to wear costumes we already have. Maybe I shouldn't give Shalach manos this year if I don't have how to pay?

mommy3b2c

Tue, Mar 05 2019, 10:42 am

What size are you? Maybe I can give you some clothing.

amother

Tangerine

Tue, Mar 05 2019, 10:43 am

mommy3b2c wrote:

What size are you? Maybe I can give you some clothing.

amother

Blue

Tue, Mar 05 2019, 10:47 am

I think there are soooo many families that depend on family money every single month to survive. It's just so hard to keep up with the bills on 2 very ordinary salaries. Hopefully things get better.

amother

Wine

Tue, Mar 05 2019, 10:48 am

amother wrote:

Where do you live?

amother

Sapphire

Tue, Mar 05 2019, 10:51 am

It's hard so hard you can take a step back and see what you can cut back on. Do you pay utilities? If yes can you lower your heat by 2-3 degrees. Are you cooking and having a lot of leftovers that got thrown away? are you making sure to buy produce that's only in season / on sale . Couponing is amazing I save a lot that way.
Also there are ways to stretch things like chop meat and tuna when you're making tuna patties and so on
These things are not necessarily fun or easy to do but it's how I'm able to manage even with this we are super behind right now with no light in sight.
Not using disposables saves.
No take out.
No cleaning help.
2nd job for your dh or you
And yes I do theses thing not easy but what keeps is going I don't get any government programs or help of any kind

amother

Khaki

Tue, Mar 05 2019, 10:53 am

What do you and dh do for work?

amother

Sapphire

Tue, Mar 05 2019, 10:56 am

amother wrote:

Thank goodness I was able to get my kids costumes this year from the gemahs and they are happy you can also try home made it can be fun all you need is some oak tag.
For sm do less and simple put a cute saying or a pic of your kids and call it a day

amother

Tangerine

Tue, Mar 05 2019, 10:57 am

amother wrote:

I'm the type who never needs the heat but share with basement and can't always shut. Yes, we pay utilities and it's a fortune every month- like $500!
I work full time and can't manage without some of the above such as disposables, cleaning help and take out.
I'm legally not allowed to work 2nd job based on my contract and husband is really trying.

Don't know, I just don't know!

amother

Tangerine

Tue, Mar 05 2019, 10:57 am

amother wrote:

What do you and dh do for work?

I work in an office full time and he works as PARA for various agencies.

amother

Pewter

Tue, Mar 05 2019, 11:03 am

is there anyway for you to go back for training to get a higher paid job even if it means taking out student loans?

Raw

Tue, Mar 05 2019, 11:08 am

Where do you live? What size costumes do your kids wear? I have so many I can lend.

ShishKabob

Tue, Mar 05 2019, 11:18 am

OP, hugs to you. More people than you know are running this type of life. So many people owe tuition, credit cards, grocery bills. It doesn't reflect on you personally, if it were up to you, you wouldn't owe anything.
Please don't work harder or try to take on more.
You are already doing your hishtadlus.
I don't think you need to run yourself more ragged. Daven to Hashem to send you a parnossa brchavah! Don't give up and don't despair. Yeshuas hashem kheref ayin. Accept as much help as you can right now and when you're in a better place financially you can pay it back or return the favor to whoever needs it at that time. Bhatzlocha!

shirabira

Tue, Mar 05 2019, 11:20 am

What color and length wig do you wear? May have one for you...

simba

Tue, Mar 05 2019, 11:25 am

amother wrote:

Don’t frown at your size..I’ve got some beautiful stuff in that size. PM me your address and I’ll mail it out.. or I’ll posy an email if you want to stay anon.

amother

Pewter

Tue, Mar 05 2019, 11:33 am

shishkabob's right- A LOT of people are in debt.

naturalmom5

Tue, Mar 12 2019, 4:13 pm

Its bshert I saw this post today. I went from over 300 lbs to 155 in the last year and a half. That means I dropped from a size 24 to a size 12. I am choking from all the clutter in a small apt.
Please let me give you clothing, 20 and 22 ..

giselle

Tue, Mar 12 2019, 4:22 pm

I have a lot of Purim costumes too. Would be glad to share with you.

amother

Tangerine

Wed, Mar 13 2019, 2:51 pm

Thanks so much, everyone, for your sympathy and kind and generous offers. Mi Keamcha Yisroel!
Just to update: BH we found Purim costumes at another gemach so are set with that. We also got small tax return but more than we've received in many years since we overpaid with marketplace last year so Hashem stored that money for us and it couldn't have come at a more opportune moment as our account would've been less than $30 that day! Yeshuas Hashem k'heref ayin! So we BH dispersed it responsibly among the many various places and expenses we owe so it feels a little better, although still need lots more.
Regarding clothing, I don't really feel comf accepting clothing at this point but thanks so much for the offers and will keep in mind!

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