Don’t waste homemade food for Shalach Manos

amother

Gold

Tue, Mar 05 2019, 1:33 pm

Ladies I know lots of people don’t eat homemade food they get from other people for Shalach Manos so I wouldn’t waste my time baking and cooking when it’ll end up in the garbage. A lot of people are machmire and won’t eat from others. When you get a lot of stuff from different people and sometimes you can’t even keep track of who gave what you don’t wnat to rely on just trusting everyone. You don’t know if they toivel dishes if you eat cholov stam not pas yisroel whatever. Just you have to know even if you’re very religious and do everything right some people won’t eat it. Bought food is best for everyone.

amother

Violet

Tue, Mar 05 2019, 1:38 pm

I give homemade goods every year & everyone thoroughly enjoys it. For teachers and principals I just give a box of chocolate. All people we give to are either family, or close neighbors and friends.

amother

Periwinkle

Tue, Mar 05 2019, 1:40 pm

I know all the people that I receive mishloach manos from and I would eat from all their houses- I love getting homemade items! In my experience they have always been labeled- cholov yisrael or yoshon or baked in a fleishig oven or the like.
I understand this view if it were in certain kinds of communities and you are bringing to teachers or rabbis who don't know you but for friends and family and neighbors?

amother

Plum

Tue, Mar 05 2019, 1:41 pm

amother wrote:

On the flip side - a lot of people are friends with the people they give to and know full well if they will accept each others food.

paperflowers

Tue, Mar 05 2019, 1:44 pm

Nah, I love homemade shalach manos. And most people label if it’s chalav yisrael, yoshon, made in a fleishig oven etc.
Most of the people I receive shalach manos from are people whose homes I would eat in.
I guess in your experience you end up having to throw away a lot, and that’s a real shame. But it’s not my experience.

SixOfWands

Tue, Mar 05 2019, 1:45 pm

amother wrote:

I give homemade goods every year & everyone thoroughly enjoys it. For teachers and principals I just give a box of chocolate. All people we give to are either family, or close neighbors and friends.

How do you know that?

Do you really think that people will tell you, to your face, that they dumped your food?

I'll be leaving at about 7:45 on Purim, and won't be home until 9 or 10 pm. My kids may -- or may not -- think to pick up any shaloch manot and put them in the refrigerator. But even then, we won't know if they arrived 20 minutes before they were retrieved, or 4 hours. So they will be trash.

Any shelf-stable food we don't use is donated, BTW.

amother

Black

Tue, Mar 05 2019, 1:45 pm

Please update that no one should waste onYOU.

I and most of my friends and neighbors eat home made as long as we know the people and it is packaged nicely. (My only friend who doesn’t is admittedly obsessed over cleanliness - she never eats food she doesn’t personally prepare). Personally I get tons of thanks for my home made lunch I send every year. People even call me the next day.

Going Anon do this - my father in law is big yeshivish posek in a large city and gets literally hundreds of mm. Nothing is thrown out (they don’t throw out any food ever). As long as it is labeled correctly and he knows of the people they eat it.

Where I live normally Purim is pretty cold. Maybe deli I would toss but most kugel, cakes, breads and veggies are totally fine sitting outside in the average Purim weather. I could see place like Florida being an issue.

amother

Navy

Tue, Mar 05 2019, 1:46 pm

Why do we send shalach Manos in the first place? The Trumas Hadeshen says it is to contribute to the seuda, and the Manot Halevi (by Rav Shlomo Alkabetz) says it's to encourage feelings of friendship. In both cases, the idea is that people eat each other's cooking. (There wasn't much takeout food in either the 14th or 16th centuries.) It doesn't speak well of us that we are too divided to eat food that our friends have prepared. I'm perfectly happy to indulge other people's chumras, but we lose some of the spirit of the day when we refuse to eat food that another religious Jew has cooked.

yamz

Tue, Mar 05 2019, 1:50 pm

amother wrote:

Navy, why did you go amother to say this? I can't like your post enough!

Raisin

Tue, Mar 05 2019, 1:51 pm

SixOfWands wrote:

I agree leaving food that can go bad is not a good idea if the recipients are not home. So its a good idea to have an alternative for those people.

But challah, cakes, cookies, bread...all those should be fine if packaged properly.

My friends who don't keep chalav yisrael don't give me home made stuff.

ra_mom

Tue, Mar 05 2019, 1:52 pm

A lot of people's nosh ends up in the trash too.
You do yours by fostering good will and giving MM, no matter what it is, and leave the rest up to others.

thunderstorm

Tue, Mar 05 2019, 2:17 pm

Like others have mentioned, I only give mishloach manos to family and friends and these people eat by me all the time. I love receiving the homemade mishloach manos. We fight over that stuff. It's only here on Imamother that I've discovered that so many people toss food. I usually get feedback from my recipients praising my food. I don't think that they go out of their way to call me if they are just lying.
I give Rebbes, teachers and some of DH's Rabbis chocolates and wine. But those closest to me get food that I put my heart and soul into and want them to enjoy it. It is one of the ways I decide who I'm giving to. If the person is not close enough to me to trust my kashrus and cleanliness then I don't give to those people. I stick to giving to less people but to people I know that will eat my food.

amother

Violet

Tue, Mar 05 2019, 2:19 pm

Six of wands, as I said, I only give homemade food to close family and friends & they're always telling me how good it was and how they wait for my shalach manos. To teachers and DH work people, we give store bought. I have no reason to believe that my parents and siblings will dump my homemade foods.

amother

Violet

Tue, Mar 05 2019, 2:26 pm

One of my neighbors sends a breakfast every Purim morning. I look out for it and it's probably the only normal thing I eat all day. I would never think of dumping it.

amother

Gold

Tue, Mar 05 2019, 2:34 pm

paperflowers wrote:

Even though that’s what you feel doesn’t mean other people do and I’m telling you a lot is thrown away. People aren’t gonna let you know it so they smile and gush and say thanks, I love it. A lot of people don’t mark what it is either and for sure not gonna tell you if it’s yoshon and all. Everyone here who’s saying nah it’s all fine we eat everything homemade that’s you and your not so careful as some people want to be, Kashrus is a very serious thing to some people so they’re more careful,

rachel6543

Tue, Mar 05 2019, 2:41 pm

I love homemade treats! I don’t get them too often, but they are appreciated by me. Especially when I get homemade challah, yum! I’d say in the past only once or twice have I not eaten homemade goodies, as I was not sure enough about the person’s kitchen. I live in a smaller community and my husband and I know whose kitchen we can and can’t eat by.

Rubber Ducky

Tue, Mar 05 2019, 2:49 pm

We look forward to the soups, challah rolls, and other homemade items that we receive as long as we know the givers and don't have a problem with their kashrus. Much tastier than the store-bought stuff!

I label everything, so my baked goods have my name on the card and say that they're pareve from a pareve oven, pas Yisroel, yoshon...

But you don't have to eat my cooking, that's OK.

amother

Copper

Tue, Mar 05 2019, 2:57 pm

I get lots of text messages thanking me for my mm that my friends ate on Purim. I can't imagine anyone going out of their way to text me a lie like that! They are all people who have eaten my food previously, and I package everything tastefully and in an appealing way, so why wouldn't they like it? It goes without saying not to leave perishable foods sitting out. That applies whether or not it's homemade.

allthingsblue

Tue, Mar 05 2019, 3:11 pm

amother wrote:

I also throw out the chocolate candies, hard candies, sparkling grape juice and many other store bought items. What's the difference?

Chayalle

Tue, Mar 05 2019, 3:14 pm

I happen to enjoy the homemade stuff.

After Purim, I take all the bought stuff that we don't want (we do like chocolate!) and DH carts it all off to Yeshiva.