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Help an obese woman dress well!
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amother




Lavender


Post  Fri, Mar 08 2019, 8:16 am
I've put on a lot of weight and I'm now about a size 24 or 3X. (Yikes, I know.)
I made an appointment with a dietitian and I just signed up at the gym. But meanwhile, can you help me look less dowdy?
I carry my weight in my midsection, so I look pregnant as well as heavy. I'm huge on top also.
My rear end is not so bad.
I'm not planning to spend a lot on clothing because I hope to start losing soon, but meanwhile I need a few pieces for work where I have to look professional.
I'm in my low 40's so no teenage styles, but I don't want to look frumpy, dowdy, or over-the-hill. Just classic and respectable.
What style of skirts and tops should I look for? Or dresses maybe? I'm really bad at this....
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amother




Hotpink


Post  Fri, Mar 08 2019, 8:20 am
try eshakti.com. I've been very successful there.
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amother




Lavender


Post  Fri, Mar 08 2019, 8:26 am
amother wrote:
try eshakti.com. I've been very successful there.

Thanks. But they have different styles. I'm asking what kind of cut and style to look for, in any brand. Pencil skirts? Flary skirts? Dresses? Stuff like that.
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FranticFrummie




 
 
 


Post  Fri, Mar 08 2019, 8:42 am
If you are in the US, go to Lane Bryant or Nordstroms. Both stores have stylists who can help you find the cuts and lengths that are the most flattering for your body type.

Big goes not have to mean dumpy, and once you know what to look for you can be very professional and fashionable.

Another tip, wear a big statement necklace or colorful silk scarf around your neck. It will draw attention to your face, and add flair.

My mom weighed 300 pounds because of a medical issue, and she always looked classy.
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giselle




 
 
 


Post  Fri, Mar 08 2019, 8:44 am
amother wrote:
Thanks. But they have different styles. I'm asking what kind of cut and style to look for, in any brand. Pencil skirts? Flary skirts? Dresses? Stuff like that.


If you’re not big on bottom, then definitely pencil skirts. Would a blazer work for your office? I agree with frantic frummie about s scarf.
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yersp




 
 
 


Post  Fri, Mar 08 2019, 8:48 am
Don't think I'm crazy, I know someone who is very overweight and is having a hard time losing weight. She shops at high end maternity stores. She does not look pregnant at all. In fact she looks amazing.
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naturalmom5




 
 
 


Post  Fri, Mar 08 2019, 9:33 am
Roamans.com

Lane Bryant
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amother




Linen


Post  Fri, Mar 08 2019, 9:46 am
ave.com
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Squishy




 
 
 


Post  Fri, Mar 08 2019, 9:59 am
I used to work in an upscale boutique that catered to large women. I dressed Roberta Flack and lots of opera singers. I was unsquishy in those days, but I have the eye, so they hired me.

I disagree with the colorful scarf unless you are wearing a sleek silhouette like a straight line tunic. You don't want bulk. I would opt for a dangly scarf if you must wear one.

Beautiful earrings on the larger side will draw attention to your face. The plastic ones currently in style will work great and help you look put together. They are very cheap in stores like Charming Charlie's. No need to pay higher prices. And these can work well on adults who don't want to look teenage.

I fully agree with the pencil skirt. Always have nice shoes for your look.

Tunics and longer tops will work great for you. Look for longer jackets with a slight flair. You want something that skims over your middle. Larger sweaters that end mid thigh with ribbing work well. The blouses with the gathering on the bottom may work depending on your stomach and the cut of the blouse. Look for details at the top and mid thigh. Don't buy things busy in the middle.

You can look in Macys and Chiccos. I love Nordstrom's, but you have to resist the personal shoppers sales push. Nordstrom's is great when you are in a mood to splurge. Catherine's has nice things. You can get good sales there, but you may have to make the clothes more tznius depending on your standards.

If you are in Monsey, there is a great little store in someone's house. The lady is formerly big and designs her line. She isn't pushy at all. Her clothes are fabulous. I went shopping with a friend there for a dress for a shimcha. If this is of interest, please let me know.

Hatzloucha on your journey. Remember diet is the key. You also want support for this. Having a cheerleader is helpful.
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andrea levy




 
 
 


Post  Fri, Mar 08 2019, 10:24 am
I wish I could help you more because I formerly weighed 315 pounds and because I was embarrassed and felt that there was no hope to look good, I often Shlumped. I was also working in food so my clothing tended to be wash and wear, opting for stuff that was long ( no stockings needed in hot kitchens).

When I look back at the few pictures I have that I think I looked good in, what I notice is that it wasn’t only the outfit as the attitude I wore it with. First, there’s finding that outfit.

For example. Even now, still overweight by over a hundred pounds but down 85, I LOVE to shop. I can go through thirty or forty dresses when looking for one for a Simcha. Recently I realized that the size you are in clothing should not a guideline. I was in a store where I own two dresses that are a fourteen. I started shopping and realized that my size ranged in that store from 12-20 depending on the cut and fabric of the dress. I just kept putting stuff on until patterns of like started to emerge.

In the end, they didn’t have my size in the one I wanted. The xl was too small. The 2X was too big. I ordered the 1X1, to home and it was perfect. What was really weird was that the exact dress in a long version REALLY did not look good on me. So don’t assume anything about the dress. Try it on. See what fits. Some shapes will look great. Some won’t. Some sizes will work better than others. Go work what looks good and makes you FEEL good.

I keep saying dress because I also have a small t tush and big breasts and belly. I have a high waist also. I recently however bought s sequinned skirt in nordstrom rack that is a pencil skirt. I bought it because I loved it and it was returnable and thus began the search for a top. The top had to cover the top part of my skirt because of my high waist but not be too long to let the sequins show and look dumpy. The shirt I found actually gives me some shape on top too!

I found the perfect top in a winners a few weeks later. With black stockings and some cute pointy medium heeled shoes and a bit of jewelry I bought for my nieces bat mitzvah I’m going to look adorable! I haven’t found the right head covering for it yet but hopefully I’ll figure it out soon. I’m going to post a few pictures from recently where I know I looked great and more importantly I felt great. These are the shapes that fit my body. You’ll figure out from trying on what works for yours!

I realized in looking for pictures that I don’t have good pics of some of my favourite current outfits. Maybe Sunday I’ll suggest a date with hubby and dress up!


Last edited by andrea levy on Fri, Mar 08 2019, 11:00 am; edited 1 time in total
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andrea levy




 
 
 


Post  Fri, Mar 08 2019, 10:25 am
yersp wrote:
Don't think I'm crazy, I know someone who is very overweight and is having a hard time losing weight. She shops at high end maternity stores. She does not look pregnant at all. In fact she looks amazing.


I wear maternity leggings all the time. My baby is 19!
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amother




Sienna


Post  Fri, Mar 08 2019, 10:38 am
riccifashions.com has a plus size line that is nice.
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andrea levy




 
 
 


Post  Fri, Mar 08 2019, 10:39 am
https://I.imgur.com/mV951J2.jpg ( pre-observant)


https://I.imgur.com/JwxYms3.jpg This is the dress that looked bad longer. This is what I mean by high waisted.

https://I.imgur.com/OWRAphD.jpg Dec. 2018
https://I.imgur.com/F8Qkpzl.jpg June 2018- the jacket isn’t quite right but the dress is perfect.

There was a time that this was my favourite dress:
https://I.imgur.com/TARjOpk.jpg

Should never have bought this:
https://I.imgur.com/K5X3W7R.jpg

Felt great in this although it really didn’t fit properly
https://I.imgur.com/oNwzKAU.jpg


Last edited by andrea levy on Fri, Mar 08 2019, 10:56 am; edited 2 times in total
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SixOfWands




 
 
 


Post  Fri, Mar 08 2019, 10:52 am
Loft now has a plus-sized line that has some nice-looking, less expensive alternatives.

The one thing that I would avoid is a shift dress, unless you're wearing a blazer with it. You need to create a waist, either with an actual waist or through use of different colors. A lot of larger women also like empire waists that skim over their tummies, but still create a waist effect. Eloquii has a LOT of them. They also carry a lot of pencil skirts, which are likely to look good on you.
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dankbar




 
 
 


Post  Fri, Mar 08 2019, 10:56 am
Macys has a PLUS SIZE SECTION they call it Womens
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Squishy




 
 
 


Post  Fri, Mar 08 2019, 11:03 am
SixOfWands wrote:
Loft now has a plus-sized line that has some nice-looking, less expensive alternatives.

The one thing that I would avoid is a shift dress, unless you're wearing a blazer with it. You need to create a waist, either with an actual waist or through use of different colors. A lot of larger women also like empire waists that skim over their tummies, but still create a waist effect. Eloquii has a LOT of them. They also carry a lot of pencil skirts, which are likely to look good on you.


I disagree about creating a waist. Don't draw attention to the middle. Mid thigh is best with OP's shape.

https://m.imgur.com/OWRAphD

I like this look of Andea's best. I would loop the necklace twice if it went. I can't see the earrings. Less is more in my opinion. Simple classy and elegant.

Love that look.
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SixOfWands




 
 
 


Post  Fri, Mar 08 2019, 11:10 am
Squishy wrote:
I disagree about creating a waist. Don't draw attention to the middle. Mid thigh is best with OP's shape.

https://m.imgur.com/OWRAphD

I like this look of Andea's best. I would loop the necklace twice if it went. I can't see the earrings. Less is more in my opinion. Simple classy and elegant.

Love that look.


But see how the dress has an empire waist, creating a waist effect? All of Andrea's looks did, IIRC.

Nothing like this:

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momof2kids




 
 
 


Post  Fri, Mar 08 2019, 11:14 am
You should balance the look, loose tops will hide a midsection balance with a more fitted skirt. Also solid colored tops in jewel and darker colors helps. Look for dressed that play with color blocks or pinstriped or tailored in key areas.
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amother




Slategray


Post  Fri, Mar 08 2019, 11:30 am
This may be off topic, and not what your post was about, but I am compelled to say this because I care. please considor weight loss surgery. I"ve been in your shoes and surgery saved my life. I am healthier, feel good about myself and can walk into any shoppes and look beautiful.

.
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andrea levy




 
 
 


Post  Fri, Mar 08 2019, 12:25 pm
amother wrote:
This may be off topic, and not what your post was about, but I am compelled to say this because I care. please considor weight loss surgery. I"ve been in your shoes and surgery saved my life. I am healthier, feel good about myself and can walk into any shoppes and look beautiful.

.


If we are headed in that direction, I’ll just say that when I was eating like a maniac, I could never have followed the food plan after surgery. If you are like me, please consider going low carb first, getting your insulin reactions under control and then seeing if you still need surgery. I never had it because I was a) pretty sure I’d be incapable of following the prep and the follow up, and b) because I was pretty sure that I’d hurt myself by overeating after.
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