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Do you hold back from complaining?

 
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ShishKabob




 
 
 


Post  Tue, Mar 12 2019, 1:14 pm
Do you hold back from complaining or pointing out issues to your child's school/yeshiva due to the fear of being labeled a complainer? or being labeled that type of a mother?
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amother




Tangerine


Post  Tue, Mar 12 2019, 1:19 pm
yes. and because I tried and was becoming THAT mother and yet wasn't getting anywhere so if it won't even help best to keep my mouth shut.
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amother




Seashell


Post  Tue, Mar 12 2019, 1:20 pm
I choose my battles because I don't expect perfection, and I know they can't possibly please everyone all the time. So I don't hesitate to speak up when something is really affecting my child and there are ways they can help. But I definitely keep my mouth shut a lot too.
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Chayalle




 
 
 


Post  Tue, Mar 12 2019, 1:31 pm
amother wrote:
I choose my battles because I don't expect perfection, and I know they can't possibly please everyone all the time. So I don't hesitate to speak up when something is really affecting my child and there are ways they can help. But I definitely keep my mouth shut a lot too.


This.

I also try to take the time to compliment them for all the things they do right.

When I go to PTA, if I can get a sec with the principal, I do, and I tell her how wonderful DD's Morahs are, and I thank her for running a school with such a fantastic staff, and I tell her how grateful I am for everything she does on my behalf.

For Chanuka or Purim, I try to send a note to the teachers to tell them how much I appreciate them. If I can, I include a giftcard with the note.

This way, if there's some point I feel a need to bring to their attention, I tend to find a more receptive ear.
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Ruchel




 
 
 


Post  Tue, Mar 12 2019, 5:41 pm
I am positive and all but if I need to you'll literally hear me scream
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groisamomma




 
 
 


Post  Tue, Mar 12 2019, 6:16 pm
Chayalle wrote:
This.

I also try to take the time to compliment them for all the things they do right.

When I go to PTA, if I can get a sec with the principal, I do, and I tell her how wonderful DD's Morahs are, and I thank her for running a school with such a fantastic staff, and I tell her how grateful I am for everything she does on my behalf.

For Chanuka or Purim, I try to send a note to the teachers to tell them how much I appreciate them. If I can, I include a giftcard with the note.

This way, if there's some point I feel a need to bring to their attention, I tend to find a more receptive ear.


Same. If you're there for the good you'll be listened to when you have a [very] valid complaint.
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amother




Firebrick


Post  Tue, Mar 12 2019, 7:36 pm
I send my principals and teachers emails when something goes really well or is well appreciated. I decide which complaints to report or investigate based on the child, age, teacher, timing, and my priorities. I often try to verify complaints with other parents in the class, and we coordinate to all report so none of us are singled out and the school notices a more generalized problem. There's one issue I chose not to mention about a teacher for one child because I knew he could handle it and I had other priorities. The next kid to have this teacher could not, so I pushed then.
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seeker




 
 
 


Post  Tue, Mar 12 2019, 8:36 pm
Yes. Sometimes there are personal issues that need to be sorted out but that's not the same thing as complaining, in my view.
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amother




Floralwhite


Post  Tue, Mar 12 2019, 9:29 pm
I know my kids aren't easy on their teachers.
I definitely have some thoughts about how the school could improve the curriculum but I'm not voicing anything because I don't want to be seen as ungrateful.
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amother




Blue


Post  Tue, Mar 12 2019, 9:56 pm
Ruchel wrote:
I am positive and all but if I need to you'll literally hear me scream


Sorry, that never ever works. Then you're just the crazy parent.
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